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TOS Caption Contest #128 - Record Time

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SCOTTY: Borgas frat!!! The bloody remote Mudd gave aint working!!!
 
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Uhura: "Sulu, I never thought that you--"
Sulu: "Don't say it. Not here. It'll just be our little secret."
 
Re: Caption Contest #128 - Record Time

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Sulu: "I'm Here, I am queer and I am Fabbbulllouuuuussssssssssssth!
 
Re: Caption Contest #128 - Record Time

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Scotty didnt realise he wasnt alone when he got out his his magnifying glass



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Uhura; "Sulu move your hands at once!"


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Sulu " Better?"
Uhura " not really, no!"



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Kirk; "Seven years is far to long, he's totally shagged out"
McCoy; "Nurse! Beam me down Scotties magnifying glass and a large jar of moisturiser"
 
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McCoy: "God Jim, what happened to Spock?"
Kirk: "I dunno, Chekov saw it happen though, he said he was bitten by a wampire. He's gone to try and catch it."
McCoy: "A wampire! What the hell's a wampire?"
Kirk: "How the hell should I know?"
 
Re: Caption Contest #128 - Record Time

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McCoy: "Yes, apparently Vulcans don't just go blind when they do it too long, they lose all feeling in their lower extremities."
 
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Bones: "Sulu, scan the surface for Gorn life signs. That pizza he just delivered had some funky mushrooms on it. Spock is really tripping balls."
 
Re: Caption Contest #128 - Record Time

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The Honarable Reverend Doctor McCoy: Dammit Spock!! How many times have I told you....Bro's before ho's....BRO'S BEFORE HO'S!!!!
 
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Romaine, upset: "And who's to say I even want an abor-"
<Scotty moves sliders on Supplemental Transporter. Romaine doubles over.>
Scotty: "Ye were sayin', luv?"
 
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Uhura: "Vomit???"
Sulu: "Yes Vomit, Gringak, Ass-less Chaps Picard, Even Rabbi Gornstien."
Uhura: "You're all.....all......"
Sulu: "Yes we all are.........in a boy band called New Kids in the Cosmos."
 
Re: Caption Contest #128 - Record Time

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McCoy: "I sold Scotty a bunch of roofies yesterday. I'll ask him where he was last night ... <flicks wrists>"
 
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McCOY:"McCoy to Enterprise...three for emergency beam-up! Have Dr. M'Benga standing by with a medkit and a shitload of barf bags!"
 
Re: Caption Contest #128 - Record Time

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McCoy: "I ask him 'Does a bear shit in the woods?' and the dumb bastard gets mauled trying to prove me wrong ..."



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Uhura: "I can't believe someone would steal my Tribble. Oh Nibbles, I hardly knew ya."
Sulu: "There, there ..."
<A muffled Tribble-chirp sounds, as if buried under clothing and intestines.>
Uhura: "Nibbles?"


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Romaine: "The best part was when you drank so much, you couldn't get a boner. <laughs> Oh, wait until I tell everyone ..."
<Scotty moved sliders on Supplemental Transporter. Romaine collapses to floor.>
Scotty: "Hard to talk without a spine, eh, lass?"
 
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Re: Caption Contest #128 - Record Time

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KIRK:"This is the last time we let landing parties bring finger paints down with them..."
 
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