TOS Caption Contest #108 - Movie Night!

[Outpost4]

I want to thank Rat Boy for filling in for me this last week. It was great to take a break and he was also more timely in posting his new contest than I generally am (it's still Saturday, right?). You're the best, Rat Boy.

This last week we had Nerys Myk with an unfortunately prescient caption, plus wins from two of our regulars, Shatmandu and Gertch. I wish Nerys Myk's caption hadn't become so poignant, but to paraphrase another great actor, we'll always have the Hole In The Wall.

I'd also like to make one more nomination to the Mudd Club - Captian Gertch, or just simply Gertch, as he has become. Besides being devistatingly funny, Gertch is one of those rare folks who has principles, stands steadfastly by them and yet never lets them get in the way of realizing we are all Bozos on this bus. In hiring people, I'd often hear an applicant say, "I love people." In Gertch's case, it's absolutely true. He cares for his fellow man, all of them, much more than most. I consider him a friend. I wish he lived next door.

KIRK: Then you jump first.

SPOCK: No, I said.

KIRK: What's the matter with you?

SPOCK: I can't swim.

KIRK: Are you crazy? The fall will probably kill you.

Kirk, offscreen: "Say 'chee-eeese!' <a flash, then a pause as he looks at the image in the camera> Goddammit, Sulu ..."

Everyone marches to the beat of a different drum. And some are obviously tone deaf.

At the last minute I have decided to post three pictures instead of my normal two. The third one is so weird, I just had to use it, and yet I don't think it's strong enough to hang on its own.

TOS Caption Contest Pantheon of Winners

26138
A beaker full of death (3x)
Adam Ihle (4x)
AlphaTrionTJW
Alyssa
ancient
Atavachron
Bad Atom (2x)
Battrekker
cakes516
CaptainJon
Captain Kate (2x)
Classic Fan
commodore64
cooleddie74 (16x)

cultcross
DeafPoet
Defcon (2x)
Diesel Micky Dolenz (9x)
Dohlman
DrBob (8x)
DS9Sega (5x)
EliyahuQeoni (3x)
FishDS9
galleywest (4x)
Gertch (19x)

Plus one this time for a total of 20!
goldbug
Guartho
Haggis and Tatties
Hambone (2x)
highlander (2x)
Jackson_Roykirk
J. Allen (2x)
jayrath
John_Picard
jptrekker
Kahloke
Kegek (2x)
Kirby
KJM
Mallory (4x)
MGagen
Mojochi
M'Sharak (9x)
NCC-1701 (6x)
Nerys Myk (17x)

Plus one this time for a total of 18!
Noname Given (2x)
NTRPRZ
Outpost4 (14x)

Quo Vadimus
Rat Boy (26x) [IMG]http://img.villagephotos.com/p/2005-1/940070/HappyBeam.gif
Redfern
SciFi75 (5x)
scottydog (15x)
Shatmandu (13x)

Plus one this time for a total of 14!
Sir Rhosis (2x)
T'Bonz (8x)
terranova
Tharpdevenport (3x)
the 4th hanson bro (2x)
The Castellan
The Cutest of Borg (2x)
The Laughing Vulcan (12x)
The Old Mixer
The Squire of Gothos (10x)
The Tone (2x)
TigerOfDarkness (2)
Tim M (3x)
Triskelion (6x)
Tristan
Turbo (2x)
vassa
Woulfe (4x)

Mudd Club

 

[Outpost4]

Training films warning about the dangers of social diseases were common in Star Fleet but unfortunately came too late for Chris Pike.

Kirk: Tubers tonight?
Spock: Can we hold off a few days?

Scotty: Watch out. I just waxed the floors in the Engine Room...

 

[scottydog]

After watching Bambi, the crew did an interpretive dance of "deer antlers".

 

[26138]

Stop! Hammer time!

 

[scottydog]

Spock: "Captain, do you like my mom jeans?"

 

[Ziz]

Mendez: What the hell am I looking at? When does this happen in the movie?
Kirk: Now. You're looking at now sir. Everything that happens now, is happening now.
Mendez: What happened to then?
Kirk: We passed then.
Mendez: When?
Kirk: Just now. We're at now, now.
Mendez: Go back to then!
Kirk: When?
Mendez: Now.
Kirk: Now?
Mendez: Now!
Kirk: I can't.
Mendez: Why?
Kirk: We missed it.
Mendez: When?
Kirk: Just now.
Mendez: When will then be now?
Kirk: Soon.
Mendez: How soon?
Pike: Sir!
Mendez: What?
Pike: We've identified their location.
Mendez: Where?
Pike: It's the moon of Vega.
Kirk: Good work. Set a course and prepare for our arrival.
Mendez: When?
Pike: At 1900 hours, sir.
Kirk: By high noon tomorrow they will be our prisoners.
Mendez: Who?

 

[Shatmandu]

Kirk leans over and whispers: "On my first day as Captain, I fired the little skinny guy back by the turbolift doors. He was Pike's nephew or something. Pike never forgave me, but what can he do about it now?"

Spock: "I shall endeavor to control my Vulcan inner-anus, Captain."

 

[Rat Boy]

And Kirk thought sitting through Pike's vacation slides before was bad.

Kirk: "Sorry it took so long, there was a long line at the store."

Spock: "That's okay, I ate the cat."

The Klingon judge wasn't impressed by the combined floor exercise routine.

 

[scottydog]

Spock: "Very well, Captain. We will go with your interpretation that Edith Keeler must die of pleasure."

Kirk: "Good. Choose your sex toy and let's find her."

 

[Shatmandu]

Hay, I forgot to say thanks for the win!

Spock, rolling eyes: "Yes, Captain, walking around with that in your underpants might help us locate Doctor McCoy."

Pike: "Beep."
Commodore: "Kirk, the theme of your stag film is disturbing to Captain Pike ..."

 

[Outpost4]

Leg wrestling was outlawed in the 23rd century as too violent.

 

[Outpost4]

Kirk: But I thought you said you had two...

 

[Rat Boy]

Spock: "I believe we have arrived during the wrong era of economic crisis."

Kirk: "What makes you say that?"

Spock: "I am fairly certain tabloids of the 1930s didn't care whether or not Linsday Lohan was a lesbian."

 

[Shatmandu]

Fraternity handshakes had become very elaborate by Kirk's century.

 

[Jackson_Roykirk]

Kirk: Errrr Spock....thanks for buying these groceries....but this isn't what I meant exactly when I said I wanted to give Edith a sausage sandwich tonight.

 

[Shatmandu]

Kirk: "You weren't a vegetarian last night, sister ..."

 

[Outpost4]

Mendez: And, Chris, this was moments before your ship ran into the giant alien deep fryer?
Pike: Beep.

 

[John Picard]

Git down, git fun-kay!

 

[Gertch]

Thank you for the win and inclusion to the asylum! And also for the very kind words. I'm adding them to my LinkedIn recommendations right now.

Kirk: "I thought something different than the rock tonight."

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Pike in chair: beep beep beep

Pike on screen: "Analyse the transmission."

Pike in chair: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep

Pike on screen: "Plot a course to the Talos Star System"

Pike in chair: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep

Pike on screen: "Take it nice and easy, we don't want to strain the engines."

Kirk: "Okay, we get it, you've memorised the dialogue." to Mendez, "You don't know how annoying that gets unless you suffer two days of it."

Spock: "I am endeavouring to construct a mnemonic circuit, and you bring me two varieties of tuber. Why?"
Kirk: "I remember in science class that by sticking a couple of electrodes in, you can generate electricity..."
Spock: "Electricity is not our problem, detailed microcircuitry is. Besides it's lemons, not potatoes."
Kirk: "Don't look at me! At least I tried. Besides I spent most of science class shagging the teacher."

Everywhere that you may go
We're jammin' in the street
All the people that you meet
Dance to the beat

If you come to new york city
You'll never be the wack
When you see us city kids
Spinning on our backs

I like the way he does that dance
When he glides across the floor
You know it really blows my mind
I always yell for more

I can't believe the things i see
Like diving on the ground
Then he's standing on his head
And groovin' to the sound

Streetdance, streetdance
Streetdance, streetdance
Streetdance, streetdance