So the Discovery not only has a built-in fidget spinner saucer ("You've never heard of the Millennial Falcon? It's the ship that made the Chipotle Run in less then twelve Pinterests"), but it also spins around on its axis and drops bombs to take out multiple fighters like the
Death Blossom from
The Last Starfighter, is navigated by
Aang's flying bison from
Avatar: The Last Airbender, and is powered by quantum 'shrooms? Swell. And people thought the USS Prometheus splitting into three parts on
Voyager was "too fanboyish." Two is fine, but three parts? Fuck that noise.
Cmdr. Landry AKA Tory the Cylon died like she lived. Stupidly and impatiently. Rekha Sharna deserved a better role. Oddly she's listed as being in all thirteen episodes of the first season on IMDb, so that's either a mistake, they list every episode where she's part of the credited cast, or the showrunners were trying to conceal the spoiler of her Darwin Award winning death after only two episodes. Seriously, she couldn't just shine a flashlight into the cell to make sure the water bear was unconscious instead of dropping the forcefield right away and getting
Revanented?
It was nice of the mining colonists to all take perfectly timed turns dramatically crying and screaming into the subspace radio before dying so Captain Loco could make a manipulative point to his crew about where their duty lies.
So, Starfleet, whose reputation for "impeccable technical hygiene" (as per that terribly written line from the first pilot) was so precise and predictable that T'Kumbaya decided to set a trap by it, left behind a dilithium processor aboard the Shenzhou even though they've begun forcing prisoners to perform hard labor under deadly conditions to extract dilithium for the war effort? And they also left behind a derelict Klingon vessel full of intelligence about the 24 Klingon Houses and a prototype cloaking device and living Klingon crew who could be interrogated or traded for Starfleet POWs? In what was clearly defined as their own territory? And they left behind a whole ship instead of scuttling it or towing it for scrap? But they did lead a special expedition back to retrieve the captain's telescope so a traitorous mutineer could have a nice moment to reflect when she's feeling down? Huh?
And the Klingons are no better, pledging to go to war in T'Kuvermodel's name but leaving behind their sacred Lightbright flagship with the now vitally important (six months later) cloaking device, and leaving his people behind to starve to death. Doesn't seem very honorable, but then the Klingons never do. While this isn't the first time we've heard of the Klingons eating their enemies (Kor bragged about feasting on an adversary's heart), I thought it did a bit of a disservice to Captain Georgiou's character to have them describe in graphic detail peeling the skin from her skull and eating it. Seriously, WTF? Just makes that bullshit about how the transporter couldn't beam her up if she didn't have any lifesigns all the more ridiculous now that you see what happens to their dead if they're left behind.
In the long list of evil shit this Starfleet will do, we can now add mutilating and torturing clearly sapient and intelligent animals for weapons and propulsion research. Goodie. They really are no different than the Equinox crew, except the Equinox crew were in a far more desperate and isolated situation than even Starfleet is.
I know Tilly rubs some people the wrong way, but she's one of the few positives I can take away from the show so far and one of the rare likeable characters, despite annoying the people around her sometimes. I find her charming in her naivete and positive outlook. Likewise with Stamets, who's the opposite of Tilly behavior wise, but is ethical and steadfast in trying to make sure his life's work is not misused for foul deeds. Isaacs is excellent as Lorca, I just don't like the character very much. I'm still indifferent on Burnham, though her pursuit of understanding of the super-tardigrade instead of just trying to weaponize it did redeem her somewhat.
Back to more long stretches of mushmouthed Klingon dialogue slowly spat out of static face masks while I miss half of what's happening onscreen as I read the subtitles. Joy. Wait, was that just some subtle Klingon sex talk? "Uncouple"? Bomchickawowow.
I give this episode a "C+".
