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Voyager Caption Contest 120: Best Friends Forever

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Tuvok: Commander, may I ask how you repaired the food replicators so quickly?

Chakotay: It's simple, I just cross-linked it to urine recyc. Like so.
 
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PARIS: Maybe you should try a laxative?

TUVOK: Vulcan meditation will...(grunt)...suffice. It's worked for thousands of years

PARIS: Did they have Leola Root on Vulcan a thousand years ago?

TUVOK: Fair point...get me some laxative!

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NEELIX: You're not still mad about the Leola Root Pie, are you?

TUVOK: Will...kill...you...someday.
 
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Tuvok: *shudder* I didn't realize you Talaxians could do that...
 
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Chakotay: What's a nice girl like you doin' in a place like this?
Janeway: A demigod with a space station, buzz off.

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Tuvok: Mr. Paris, I suggest you find some other officer to chat with or my nonviolent principles will be seriously put to the test.
(beat)
As will your skull's structrual integrity.


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Tuvok: Mr. Neelix.
Neelix: Mr. Vulcan?
Tuvok: I believe you served Romulan ale instead of berry punch in that punch bowl.
Neelix: Is that why I can't stand up? I thought they were very potent berries!
 
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CHAKOTAY: My people have a legend.....

JANEWAY: One to beam up. Hello? Dammit, I said one to beam up! VOYAGER COME IN!

CHAKOTAY: You're gonna break a rib pounding on your chest like that . Which reminds me of another tale of my people....

JANEWAY: For the love of god, Voyager, beam me up!!!
 
Thanks for the Captionated...

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Paris: "Do we have to be so Vulcan about this?"
Tuvok: "Logic dictates that I stay true to my nature."
Paris: "Okay, okay. The church is inclined by 32 degrees to true, while the steeple has been distorted at 5% above midpoint, which will require a raising of and an additional force of 2.3 Newtons on the right index finger to set right."

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Janeway: "Janeway to Security. I've passed my Akoochimoya tolerance for the day. Get this idiot out of here, and his spirit guide, and get me some damned coffee."

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EMH: "Are you ready to lambada?"
Seven: "Are you prepared to spend the next four hours rewriting your groin subroutine?"
EMH: "The waltz it is."

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Neelix: "If you've finished mindmelding with the chair, Mr Vulcan, I need somewhere to park my keester."

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Chakotay: "Here's to swimming with bow legged women."
Tuvok: "A logical sentiment."
 
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Paris: Nope, the Enterprise android's world's smallest violin is point three microns smaller.
Tuvok: Dammit!


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Chaks: I dream of a universe where the stars are your eyes and the universe worships the night -
Janes: How can stars be eyes?? Stop being an idiot with no sense of diametric scale. And how can night fall in the whole universe at the same time?
Chaks: The hell, Riker!?


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EMH: Ever been to Mars in a '57 Chevy?
Seven: No. Have you ever surgically removed a size eight Borg boot from your own lower digestive tract?


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Tuvok: I wonder if Seven and the Captain are going to need us this week.
Neelix: Oh no he di'in't!


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Tuvok: To lizard baby separation anxiety.
Chaks: Yep.
 
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NEELIX: Turns out the mushrooms I put in the Leola Root salad are psychotropic when ingested by Vulcanoids.

TUVOK: This talking hedgehog is beginning to scare me.
 

Neelix: "Mr. Vulcan, what are you lookng for under here?"

Tuvok: "The Enterprise caption contest. I have an overwhelming urge to make Archer look foolish."

Neelix: "I'm sorry, Mr. Vulcan, but the contest has been gone for months. And Archer already looks foolish."
 
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Janeway: Is that your hand on my ass?

Chakotay: Yesssss

Janeway: You have half an hour to stop that!
 
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Paris: I've scanned the entire ship three times. No trace of the next caption contest.

Tuvok: Illogical!

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Janeway: Commander, is that a caption contest in your uniform or are you just happy to see me?

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Doctor: Seven, what's wrong?

Seven: I am having difficulty focusing on this dance routine. I am preoccupied by the location of the next caption contest.

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Neelix: Mr. Vulcan! What are you doing down here?

Tuvok: This is the only place on the ship that I have not checked. I must find the caption contest!

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Chakotay: And we'll threaten to serve this poisoned wine to the entire crew unless they tell us where the caption contest is.

Tuvok: Logical.
 
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Chakotay: Captain what is wrong?

Janeway: I think that ba**ard Paris has swapped my eye drops for superglue....again!
 
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Paris: I've scanned the entire ship three times. No trace of the next caption contest.

Tuvok: Illogical!

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Janeway: Commander, is that a caption contest in your uniform or are you just happy to see me?

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Doctor: Seven, what's wrong?

Seven: I am having difficulty focusing on this dance routine. I am preoccupied by the location of the next caption contest.

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Neelix: Mr. Vulcan! What are you doing down here?

Tuvok: This is the only place on the ship that I have not checked. I must find the caption contest!

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Chakotay: And we'll threaten to serve this poisoned wine to the entire crew unless they tell us where the caption contest is.

Tuvok: Logical.

:guffaw::guffaw::guffaw::guffaw::guffaw::guffaw:

You win the thread!

No but I totally will be posting the new contest tonight lol.
 
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Neelix: What's wrong?

Tuvok: I'm hammered ever since Tom Paris added three shots for every time someone says "new caption contest tonight!" without actually doing it, to our weekly drinking game.
 
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What did you say your password was again?

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I'm not falling for the old "Let me touch your commbadge" trick again.

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After her date with The Doctor, Seven summed it up to Captain Janeway: "He took it out."

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Neelix: I don't know how safe you'll be hiding under the table when the ship explodes, Mr. Vulcan.
 
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