Contest: ENTER VGR Caption Contest #236: The One Where Paris is Demoted

[Laura Cynthia Chambers]

Paris: "Ehhhh....what's up, Doc?"
EMH: "Nice try, but it would be more convincing with a carrot."

 

[Oddish]

PARIS: "So you're saying that before we can trade with your people, we have to put on these skintight blue onesies?"
AMBASSADOR: "That's correct."
CHAKOTAY: "I'd like to see you in one of those, Kathryn."

 

[Leviathan]

EMH: Actually Mr Paris...the Probe-U-Lator goes in the OTHER end...

 

[Leviathan]

Shown here is the standard Starfleet Personnel response to the Probe-U-Lator.

 

[Leviathan]

Janeway wins yet ANOTHER staring contest....

 

[tharpdevenport]

Tom: "Doctor said he scanned my head and found nothing. Apparently I suffer from Dizzy Dean syndrome."

 

[Laura Cynthia Chambers]

When the teacher looks at you and you have to pretend you weren't just talking in class.

 

[Oddish]

TOM: "Head lice. I still don't believe it. I got head lice."

 

[Laura Cynthia Chambers]

Janeway: "What's the matter, Tom? I thought you liked lemons!"
Paris: "CARS! Not lemon juice!"

 

[tharpdevenport]

TOM: "Head lice. I still don't believe it. I got head lice."

Doc: "Space lice. Commonly founds on space salamanders. Funny, Captain had them, too. Downstairs."

 

[Oddish]

Doc: "Space lice. Commonly founds on space salamanders. Funny, Captain had them, too. Downstairs."

Not sure I needed THAT image on my head.

 

[Finn]

EMH's Log; I'm impressed. They were holographic lice. That'd teach him to mess with B'Elanna. I'm waiting a couple days before telling him.

 

[tharpdevenport]

Doctor: "All right now. Are you comfortable?"

Tom: "Yes."

Doctor: "Feeling okay?"

Tom: "Yes."

Doctor: "Well, now, see? Going to the doctor for a check up wasn't so bad, now was it? Now I'll get comfortable: Computer -- activate emergency medical extra small pink speedo."

 

[Oddish]

Computer -- activate emergency medical extra small pink speedo."

Didn't need that image in my head either.

I'm starting to empathize with Bashir in "Looking for Par'mach in All the Wrong Places".

 

[A Chimpanzee & 2 Trainees]

Nuh uh.. no, I don't believe you!

I'm telling you Wesley, he's not an android, just some guy in gold paint!

 

[tharpdevenport]

Didn't need that image in my head either.

I'm starting to empathize with Bashir in "Looking for Par'mach in All the Wrong Places".

Doctor: "Computer, add additional emergency medical Penisrock attachment. For science."

 

[A Chimpanzee & 2 Trainees]

Doctor: "Computer, add additional emergency medical Penisrock attachment. For science."

Tom: My Eyessss!!! Ruk, protect!

 

[Oddish]

Computer, delete the Doctor's junk.

 

[tharpdevenport]

Computer, delete the Doctor's junk.

Computer: "Request denied."

Doctor: "Don't have my access codes. The Penisrock stands."

 

[Laura Cynthia Chambers]

Paris: "What do you mean, you've never seen "The Beast of Hollow Mountain"? You really are a backwards primitive race, aren't you?"
Chakotay (thinking): "Aaaaand, that's when things started to go downhill..."