Contest: ENTER VGR Caption Contest #216: The One With Giant Hirogen In It

[Orac]

Welcome to the all new Star Trek Voyager Caption Contest!

Here are the winners of the last contest...

@Tenacity wins the Best Fart Joke with:

Seven: That smell, was last night burrito night again?

Chak: Yes it was, where's that coming from?

Janeway: As a starship captain, my shit don't smell.


@Apilo wins the Captain's Choice Award with:

EMH: Is it still showing 'HTTPS_404_NOT_FOUND'? Engineering is getting disciplined after this...


Third Prize goes to @Tenacity with:

EMH (using little old lady voice)

"Who is it?"

@Ryan Thomas Riddle wins Second Prize with:

Doctor (Picardro): Why can't you stop being a prick for one second?!
Doctor (Dick): I prefer the term 'Holo-Dick', thank you very much.



And the winner is @Captain pl1ngpl0ng with:
Janeway: yeah that probe out there looks excactly like my first husbands slong...

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Here're th' new pictures:

 

[Captain pl1ngpl0ng]

Hirogen: Yeah, we picked up a transmission from Earth, something called Pulp Fiction, you just wait here...

 

[Orac]

Janeway: My god, it looks exactly like my third husbands flaccid penis.

 

[JirinPanthosa]

JANEWAY: Is that what I think it is?
DOC: Yes. One of the crew is cosplaying species 8472.

Seven and Tuvok enter a dimensional rift into the Kelvin timeline.

HIROGEN: 350 years ago we visited a planet called Earth. We've had to wear these ever since.

CHAKOTAY: It's an ancient Earth mobile game. You win by spending a lot of money on unlocking perks.
NEELIX: Humans truly were savage.

JANEWAY: Wait, you built an entire culture around murdering people? How is that even sustainable?
HIROGEN: Racist!

 

[Tenacity]

Neelix: Nobody plays Tetris anymore.
Chak: Shut up, I'm trying to concentration.
Neelix: You're almost at the top.
Chak: I'm be fine if I just get a long one.
Neelix: That's what she said.
Chak: Shut up.

 

[Captain Crow]

Chakotay: Neelix. I'm looking through Tom's diary and he keeps mentioning a bridge officer called "Commander Blanderson the Charismaless Wonder". Any clue who this person is?

Neelix, unconvincingly: No.

[shuttle interior suddenly lights up red]

Seven: SHIT ME!

[screeching brakes sound as shuttles front end dips down]

Seven, while flipping the bird: BRAKE CHECKING ASSHAT!

 

[Tenacity]

Janeway: This was no boating accident..

 

[Apilo]

Seven: Warp 9! 9.2... 9.3...
Tuvok: We need breakaway speed!

 

[Nerys Myk]

TUVOK: Wait, Kirk fights a woman in a foil bikini and I get this guy?

EMH: Yes, according the old man his scheme was foiled by "meddling kids and their dumb dog".

SEVEN: Screw "Vulcan normal", turn on the damn AC!

 

[kira_nerys]

Neelix barely hides his disappointment as he sees Chakotay getting way hotter dating app matches than him.

 

[Tenacity]

Neelix: Wait, are those nudes of Kes?
Chak: Just another random petite blonde on Spacebook, calm down.

And so Tuvok had to endure UV tanning lights all the way to Risa, just so Seven would not arrive melanin challenged.

 

[Finn]

[

Janeway: He’s more lively than Chakotay.

 

[Herbert]

EMH: Captain, I'm afraid this is all that's left of..
Janeway: <Excitedly> Neelix?!!?!
EMH: uh, no, it's..
Janeway: Damn. I was hoping to be finally rid of the annoying little f k

 

[Nerys Myk]

JANEWAY: So we know it's molting, changing and growing. What does this mean?
EMH: Have you seen the film "Alien"?

 

[Orac]

The Boney M reunion concert was a huge disappointment for the fans.

 

[Tenacity]

Janeway: my God harry, what have they done to you?

 

[Delta Vega]

"Galileo. . . . . . Galileo
Galileo Figaro
Magnifico o o o o o o o oh"

 

[Nerys Myk]

JANEWAY: This? Bought it at Gabriel Lorca's Estate Sale

 

[kira_nerys]

"Um, hey Steve"?
"Yeah?"
"Do you think there is a special happy place we go to after we die?"
Steve uncomfortably, "Oh boy, I don't know how to break this to you.."

 

[Tenacity]

EMH: Now that it has molted it's original skin, it could look like any one of us.