TOS Caption Contest #97 - Whom Gods Delay

[Phantassm]

Matthew & Luke are angered by the King James interpretation of their gospels!

Nona just learned the vulcan technique of hand-pleasure.

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

CW: "It say here that Snu-Snu can only be imparted by priestess in Peach Wookiee fur bikini."

CF: "Such is law!"

 

[Shatmandu]

Picard: "Candle wax, pearl gray, hot."

Shatner, thinking: "If I have to suck in my gut any more, my belly button will be on my back ..."

Manager Grignak: "Mind that you eat here, we do not. Extra napkins, do I give you, please to wipe up ass sweat from booth seat when finish."
Picard: "I don't work for you. <turns, leaves in huff>"

Picard: "Tea, Earl Grey, hot."
Manager Grignak: "Out, we are."
Cloud William: "Milk shake. You try milk shake."
Picard: "My dignity prevents me from consuming such a thing."

 

[Shatmandu]

Pleather Festus: "Oh, I thought perhaps you'd be the other Captain, the non-haired one with the ... interesting ... pants ... <leers>"

 

[Triskelion]

Beverly, (from door): Lucky, don't forget my damned curly fries!
Picard: I told you to wait in the truck!

 

[Gertch]

"Welcome to New Risa. You not in Holi Reservation book. You can stay - in Cloud Festus room."

 

[Rat Boy]

Cloud Festus: "No, no! Only the eyes of a manager may see the eleven herbs and spices!"

 

[Rat Boy]

Jenson: "It is said that good shall defeat evil..."

Shatner: "Wait, wait; isn't this like the seventh episode where people from another planet pit us against each other in a contest of good versus evil?"

Nimoy: "Just stick to the script, Bill."

Shatner: "You stay out of this, you prima donna!"

Nimoy: "Hack!"

Jenson: "Well, it sure wasn't like this on the set of Bonanza."

 

[cooleddie74]

"Here in Holiest of Holies...it is spoken that men with fireboxes will come from the sky...and bring about a new day of peace...and learning...and velour."

"GOT IT...

It was a fly.

Seriously."

 

[Rat Boy]

Cloud Honky-Tonk: "Sorry; no Megan Fox on list."

Carl Spock: "I think we can make an exception, you dig?"

 

[cooleddie74]

WILL-I-AM:"Holiest of Holies say you not funky and smooth enough.

Carl Spock not allow you to stay for Groove Festival."

 

[Triskelion]

Welcome strangers. Be ye Bookbinders, Furriers or Wigmakers?

 

[Rat Boy]

Cloud Honky-Tonk: "I... do not fully understand, one named Carl... but the Funky Words will be obeyed; I swear it!"

 

[EliyahuQeoni]

"Ass you cover, otherwise service no"

 

[M'Sharak]

Don't call me fuzzy, Greenie!
Don't call me greenie, Fuzzy!

[cue wah-wah guitar]

 

[Starpaul20]

Cloud William: Holiest of Holies says...
Tigh: Ah, shut the frak up or I'll shove that book where the 'Holiest of Holies' can't get at it!

 

[SciFi75]

The Supreme Moderator: Assless chaps, references to gay sex, pimping, references to farting, making fun of the disabled, insulting the other sex, Sulu bashing...."

The list for all of the violations of the Captain Contest was beginning to get ugly.

 

[26138]

Cloud William: We no serve you.
Picard: I've got shoes; I've got a shirt; Where's my service?
Manager Grignak: Ass you cover, or service no!

 

[Rat Boy]

Cloud Honky-Tonk: "It is said that groovy shall defeat funky."

Carl Spock: "Amen, soul brother."

 

[M'Sharak]

Cloud William: Who those guys?
Carl Spock: They are my theme music, fuzzy man. Every badass has got to have some.