TOS Caption Contest #123 - Bend Over
- Thread starter Outpost4
- Start date
AlrikFirst Time Winner!
Woo Hoo!!! Much thanks.
Rand:"I am sooo sorry for spilling on your lap Captain. Here let me help clean that up for you."
Kirk:"No harm yoeman...but you missed a spot. Mmmmmm......yeah.......right there...........that's it."
McCoy:"Oh dear lord....get a room would ya?" *chug*
Spock:"Then I had a vision that a young Russian gentleman would be manning this station. I wonder what that could possibly mean."
Stiles:"I've got a bad feeling about this."
Scotty:"Aye Mr. Spock, I had an entire bag of jelly beans stashed here and now there's only this wee red one left. Who'd go 'n do sucha thin?"
Spock:"Fascinating. Perhaps someone is trying to look out for your health Mr. Scott."
Scotty:"Ga, are ya daft man? Ja think I'm gunna balloon up and grow a mustash or somethin?"
Spock:*raises one eyebrow*
"But in front of..."
"The good doctor is either high or blind, Scotty found him draining phaser coolant yesterday evening. Now, unzip me and get to work."
McCoy: "Jim, have you noticed the pictures for these caption contests have gotten a little more...suggestive?"
Kirk: "Suggestive? What are you talking about? How can anyone misinterpret what's going on here?"
Rand: "Uh, sir, I'm caught in your zipper."
Kirk: "Oh, that's okay. Let me just take my pants off and that'll fix it."
McCoy: *sigh*
Grace Lee Whitney had the unfortunate task of re-gluing Shatner's pubic toupee after every shot.
Scotty: Ack! That's where Doctor McCoy left Mr. Arex's stool sample!
RAND:"I sure hope this stuff on your lap is ranch dressing, sir."
STILES:"The gummi control panel is malfunctioning, Mister Spock. Options?
Should I reroute power to the Pixie Stik sensors?"
SCOTTY:"See, lad?
Bloody told ye I usually leave one stray quaalude next to me eight-track stereo deck!"
SPOCK:"When I give the signal...jettison the stale pork rinds and nachos in the galley. Then ignite the whole mess!"
Kirk: Yeoman, when I said take care of the captain's log... this isn't what I meant.
Bones: Oh, shuddup, Jim. You know you like it.
McCOY:"Tell her the story you were telling me, Jim.
You know.
The one about the blond yeoman who choked to death on protein?"
STILES:"Main navigation's offline, sir.
Should I go to backup? A spotter, road flares and asking directions?"
SCOTTY:"There's yer bloody multivitamin, Mister Spock.
Now ye'd best be careful with 'em. Sometimes the junkie ensign on Deck 20 mistakes supplements for uppers."
KIRK:"Be careful, Janice.
Get it all in the cup...then wait while I go get the subspace webcam."
SCOTTY:"That Dr. Daystrom was full of shit."
Yeoman Rand was quite skilled at "milking the prostate."
RAND:"Dr. McCoy is here...do you want me to open my mouth and make the barking noise this time sir?"
"See, lad.
Told you Morpheus knew where to hide the wee red pill in case the bloody Klingons boarded the ship and looked!"
McCoy: "Jim, have you noticed the pictures for these caption contests have gotten a little more...suggestive?"
Kirk: "Suggestive? What are you talking about? How can anyone misinterpret what's going on here?"
Rand: "Uh, sir, I'm caught in your zipper."
Kirk: "Oh, that's okay. Let me just take my pants off and that'll fix it."
McCoy: *sigh*
Kirk: "Oh dear, I spilled vinaigrette all over your uniform."
Rand: "I'd better take it off and toss it in the wash."
McCoy: "I'm outta here."
