TOS Caption Contest #108 - Movie Night!

[cooleddie74]

"We don't have a lot of time, Spock...Edith will be up here in just a couple of minutes!

Quick...pull down your trousers, bend over and start moaning...I'll stand behind you holding these when she knocks and walks in!"

 

[cooleddie74]

MENDEZ:"Seen it, Jim.

Is AIRWOLF on another channel? I just love AIRWOLF."

 

[Nerys Myk]

Announcer: And now back to Earth's Funniest Home Videos.

MENDEZ: ooooh, that had to have hurt.

KIRK: A line drive to the balls never gets old.

 

[John Picard]

Kirk: No whammies No whammies No whammies!

Brilliant! This is a clear cut winner.

 

[cooleddie74]

SPOCK:"No mozarella or swiss?


You are dead to me, Captain."

 

[cooleddie74]

MENDEZ:"Great. History Channel's showing more reruns.

Anything else on, Jim?"

 

[Rat Boy]

Kirk: "Damn that Grignak! He said this was the Lindsey Lohan/Sam Ronson sex tape!"

 

[cooleddie74]

KIRK:"Oh, this is a good one, Jose...Chris...

This one's where Sam leaps into a starship captain and has to keep his English armory officer from having everyone else think he's gay."

 

[cooleddie74]

SPOCK:"Jim...how is a hard roll and log of bologna going to construct a mnemonic memory circuit?"

KIRK:"Got me.

But if we get really, really lonely they'll make the night pass a lot quicker."

 

[S'kai]

SPOCK:"Jim...your attempt to construct a starship model out of food items and a lampshade is unlikely to impress Miss Keeler."

 

[Outpost4]

Spock: Jim, I said we needed a Marconi, not a bologna.

 

[Starpaul20]

Kirk: So, does anyone have any more... scatological jokes to add?
Scotty: Aye, how about "gravity plating failed"?
Pike: Beep, Beep, Beep!

 

[Shatmandu]

Spock: "Uh, speaking of your diet, Captain ... the other tenants stopped by and asked that you only ... evacuate your bowels ... in the alley, rather than the shared facilities ... due to the inherent spraying ..."

 

[Gertch]

Kirk: "With all the down and out people around here I thought I'd ask Edith if she'd like to help me hide the salami."
Spock: "She will know that is baloney sir."

 

[scottydog]

Kirk: "How can you stand there with your hands clasped behind your back and tell me you don't know where the other tube of salami is?"

Spock: "My hands are not clasped behind my back."

 

[Shatmandu]

Spock: "I'm a top."

 

[Rat Boy]

Spock: "You do realize I'm a vegetarian, don't you?"

 

[Shatmandu]

Spock: "Can I be the horny lumberjack and you the timid hitchhiker this time?"

 

[Outpost4]

Spock: Captain, you're so butch.

 

[Outpost4]

Kirk: So, does anyone have any more... scatological jokes to add?
Scotty: Aye, how about "gravity plating failed"?
Pike: Beep, Beep, Beep!

Kirk: What in the fuck is "gravity plating"?