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TOS Caption Contest #104 - This Time, Blue Shirts Die

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McCOY:"WELL, Spock?!

We all gonna stop jawin' and bang this broad or not?!?"
 
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"Stay avay from de bean casserole, Hikaru.

TRUST me.

And my apologies."
 
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Pavel: "Let your son be an actor Chekov, Growing pains is a good show Chekov, Boner is a cool nickname Chekov."
 
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Sulu (inner monologue): "He's so hot when he's frustrated."



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Spock: "Lt., I donm't care how 'hot' Ensign Bambi is, she is wearing a red shirt, therefore she will be joining the Away Team."
 
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Yeoman - Mr Spock, would you care to say a few words, you knew him best.

Spock - Lt. Shiny Sides was a great friend, someone I knew would always accept me when others wouldn't. Somone whom I carried on many deep heartfelt talks till all hous of the morning, and could make me see things from a different perspective. To many he may have just been a goldfish, but to me he was much more. He was my best friend. Rest in Peace Lt. Shiny Sides.

Scotty - Plays Amazing grace

McCoy - And now we commit this body back to the earth from which it came.

Boma - Flush

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Pavel - I can't believe Lt. Shiny Sides is gone.

Sulu - It's just a damn goldfish, you can get a bag of them for like a buck at PetCo.

Pavel - You my friend, have no soul.
 
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BOMA: All I'm saying is we should have on suits and gloves and stuff.
It is glowing and the Doctor and the Engineer are hiding behind a feaking wall!!!
 
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- Dirty Sanchez, Chekov. Turkish Snow-cone, Chekov. Portuguese Breakfast, Chekov. Chili Rainbow, Chekov.
- Bad night at the Menagerie, Pavel?
- Don't make me he-bitch man-slap you!

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Spock: And now gentlemen Yeoman Bette will demonstrate the proper usage of the new shuttle "squatter".
 
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Chekov: "Yeesh! I pick the night of Engineering's Chili Supper to pop in and use the toilet."



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Boma: "We were just talking about heavy things on the shuttle ..."
Spock: "It is never appropriate to tell Yeoman Loveshead how much your penis weighs."
 
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Chekov: "If dat's the vay it vorks around here, de Keptin can keep his promotion."


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Spock: "'Trouser Trout' is not a phrase I am familiar with, Mister Boma."
 
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Chekov: "Sulu! If you dont stop poking me with that stick under the console im telling the Captain"
Sulu " Stick?"


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Spock " It is as we suspected gentlemen...we do not have enough credits for four spliffs, we must disassemble three and construct one hyper-joint which we will all share."
 
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Chekov: "Can't nawigate out of a vet paper bag? I should tell the keptin to go wuck himself."
 
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Chekov: "No, really: vhat if God vas one of us?"

Sulu: "That's it. We're not listening to adult contemporary anymore. I'm switching to Howard Stern."
 
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"Bend over, Chekov...

Take off your shirt, Chekov...

Spread your asscheeks, Chekov...

Pardon my cold hands on your shoulders, Chekov...

Tell the cops and I'll stab you in the face, Chekov...

Ven vill it END?!"


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SPOCK:"Logically, her mouth cannot service all four of us at once. One of us has to go first."
 
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"I've been more abused in this contest than a schlemazl in the front row of a Don Rickles concert!"
 
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"Dear God...

Please...

Don't let me be typecast after this show ends. Please. At the very least...throw me a LOVE AMERICAN STYLE episode...or Eastwood film role as a background guy every year or two."
 
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