Picard: "Oh ... ooohhh ... OOOHHH ... where have you been, Ass-Rubbing Clone? It feels like it's been years since I've seen you. Make it so!"
Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #575: Around the Table
- Thread starter LeadHead
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Picard: "Oh ... ooohhh ... OOOHHH ... where have you been, Ass-Rubbing Clone? It feels like it's been years since I've seen you. Make it so!"
Picard: Worf, just admit you farted and we can get on with our lives.
Picard: Poke her? I hardly know her!
Crusher: So as you can see they were cyanotic and non-responsive, so I was unable to resuscitate with pulmonary
stimulators and the cardiac infusers. Even the cortical electrodes did not produce any positive results.
Picard: Interesting, what, uh, is your next step?
Troi: Captain, I'm getting that you have no idea what Dr. Crusher just said and are just trying to make it seem like what she said made sense to you.
Picard: Doctor, I when you are done with your current case, you need to take a look at Counselor Troi, as her empathic ability is clearly not working.
Crusher: Sir, I've told you multiple times, her abilities are fine, yours however...
Christmas Day: When your parents are so fascinated with the toy they bought you that they won't let you play with it.
That moment when they realized the little thing in Beverly's medical tricorder contain vodka.
PICARD: You know, I think I will assimilate this deck... Resistance is futile.
Worf quietly ponders why six of them are crammed into half the table space, while the rest is empty
PICARD: I think we'd all like an explanation why you posted the full script for Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker one week before its release in theatres...
PICARD: "What's that, are you writing a holo novel?"
BEVERLY: "Yes, it's loosely based on our own adventures, but with all the names changed, and with more relationship humor added so it's more fun."
TROI: "Why 'The Orville'?"
BEVERLY: "It's what I originally wanted to name Wesley, but Jack overruled me."
PICARD: How am I "Mercer"??? Will's the Mercer!!!!!
PICARD: "What's that, are you writing a holo novel?"
BEVERLY: "Yes, it's loosely based on our own adventures, but with all the names changed, and with more relationship humor added so it's more fun."
TROI: "Why 'The Orville'?"
BEVERLY: "It's what I originally wanted to name Wesley, but Jack overruled me."
When you show up to a staff meeting and everybody's practicing their poker faces.
Picard: "Now that we're all here, let's discuss the script we had to belch out last season."
Worf: "Which one, many of them sucked."
Data: "There were twenty six of them, of which two were amalgamated into one story. Each page in a script encompasses roughly one minute of screen time and generally pictures are not allowed as that form of padding is usele-- "
K'ehylr: "Mister Data, how many other ways to bore people to sleep are you capable of?"
Data: "Numerous ways, of course. I am programmed in multiple techniques, eight million six hundred seventy five thousand three hundred nine to be precise, a broad variety of sleep inducing protocols for organic life forms, all of which which appear to annoy Doctor Crusher because she prefers just to pump people full of relaxants regardless of their side-eff--"
Troi: "Captain, I sense he's being subtle in saying it's well past Wesley's bedtime. Ours too."
Captain: "That's obvious. Stop doing that." (turns to Data) "You too. Be glad Dr Crusher isn't here right now or I'd tell her to grasp your off switch."
Picard: "Now that we're all here, let's discuss the script we had to belch out last season."
Worf: "Which one, many of them sucked."
Data: "There were twenty six of them, of which two were amalgamated into one story. Each page in a script encompasses roughly one minute of screen time and generally pictures are not allowed as that form of padding is usele-- "
K'ehylr: "Mister Data, how many other ways to bore people to sleep are you capable of?"
Data: "Numerous ways, of course. I am programmed in multiple techniques, eight million six hundred seventy five thousand three hundred nine to be precise, a broad variety of sleep inducing protocols for organic life forms, all of which which appear to annoy Doctor Crusher because she prefers just to pump people full of relaxants regardless of their side-eff--"
Troi: "Captain, I sense he's being subtle in saying it's well past Wesley's bedtime. Ours too."
Captain: "That's obvious. Stop doing that." (turns to Data) "You too. Be glad Dr Crusher isn't here right now or I'd tell her to grasp your off switch."
Data: "Captain, that is not the 'Off switch' she has been grasping, though I do quickly fall asleep after said grasping."
Data: "The round is over. Captain, you must now recite a poem."
Picard: "But I beat all of you. Why should I pay the forfeit?"
Riker: "You may have to speak, but we have to listen...*winces* did I just say that out loud?"
La Forge: "'Fraid so."
Data: "The round is over. Captain, you must now recite a poem."
Picard: "But I beat all of you. Why should I pay the forfeit?"
Riker: "You may have to speak, but we have to listen...*winces* did I just say that out loud?"
La Forge: "'Fraid so."
Data: "Should this be the same poem I recited to you from 'The Naked N'--"
Picard: "No! Nobody in this room mention that scene from that story ever again."
Yar: "That's my line."
Geordi: "I can see you."
Yar: "That's because you have the Force, I mean the VISOR."
Yoda: "Intuitive, she is--"
Kenner Been Oh Buy-One: "From a certain point of view, yes."
OK, time to put a cork in this bottle ‘til he of the leaden cranium can get to it.
Thanks to Timewalker for the suggestion. Having heard nothing from the good Leadhead in 6 months, I want to offer the opportunity to start a new Caption Contest string. It is an effort that needs constant attention so someone would need to be devoted to the task. Please PM me if you’re interested.
Best wishes to the master, Leadhead, wherever he may be.
Best wishes to the master, Leadhead, wherever he may be.
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