Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #549: Meetings!

Data: "Sir, I believe I have found something for you..."




(thanks to Cutie McWhiskers for putting the images together!)

(that's from an Angry Video Game Nerd game review; I made that gif and posted it in the previous Thread Bombs thread)

 

Picard: Mister Data, is this yours?

 

Geordi: "Uh....Captain....we requested a voice over, not a face over. Although, that is a 'topological anomaly' if ever I've seen one!"

Data: "You have completely ruined and disrespected the elaborate graphic that I devoted so much time and energy into producing. My emotion chip is not happy with you right now!"

Picard: "How many times do I have to say that these parallel universes that keep cropping up are not my fault!"

 

PICARD: So when I was away, Captain Jelico changed the dress code?
RIKER: Yeah, shall we change it back?
PICARD: No, then it would be too obvious why I did it. *Sigh* End of an era.



PICARD: So you slingshot the birds at the giant structures? Ingenious.



LT FLY: They don't know I'm in here. Do I let them know I'm here and have just heard lots of classified information or do I wait here and stay quiet until the meeting is over?



GEORDI: They're still firing torpedoes. Shall we raise shields?
RIKER: Not yet. First we need to sit down and discuss whether to raise shields.
GEORDI: Good call.



DATA: Sensors show we are trapped in a suggestively shaped anomaly.
GEORDI: To escape, we have to surround the ship in beta verteron particles.
DATA: These particles will act as the proverbial lube, allowing us to...
GEORDI: Umm, Data, inappropriate metaphor for the Captain.
DATA: Explain.

 

Picard: Will....
Riker: Sir...?
Picard: Would you quit it with the laser pointer....



Riker: Tasha?
PIcard: Merde! No wonder she could run across that battlefield.

 

First Officer's Personal Log: An unexpected side effect of how Data got us out of that time loop is that his three pips message has effected other crew members. Now every time the Captain looks at my rank, he just agrees with me.

Sweet.




Picard: Mr. Data has not gotten the hand of dick pics yet I see.




The cameraman went to all the effort of suggesting and setting up this shot, only to be thwarted by Marina Sirtis sitting on the wrong side of the table.




Geordi: Crusher, we saw you grab the gold ships of the wall. Trying to sneak out with them shoved up your coat won't fool us.




Data: So it turns out a magic eye picture can kill all Borg.

 

Geordi: "Podcasts really don't seem to go well for us."

Data: "Leopards really can change their spots, if they become extremely nauseous."

Picard: "I feel like I've been boiled with my own pudding."

 

Data's first attempt at doing a Lightwave wireframe drawing of chalice impressed nobody.

 

Data: "You must choose....but choose Wesley."

Geordi: "Something isn't quite right here...."

Picard: "Merde..."

 

Data: This is the result of saying "forty-seven" to the replicator forty-seven times.

 

Per starfleet protocol #11657, Data turned in his card and walked out having quickly achieved "Meeting BullShit BINGO".

 

Potted Plant: I will have my revenge...soon....soon...

 

Riker: Sir, are you sure it is a good idea to allow Worf to play the Klingon version of "Duck, Duck, Goose" with us?

Worf: "jajlo' Qa', jajlo' Qa', po Ha'DIbaH" is a test of a warrior's resolve!



Picard: Data? This says you've got "the runs." How can an android have the runs?

Data: Sir, I do not have time for my whole, "prick us, do we not bleed" speech. Suffice to say, you never know where you'll be when diarrhea hits you.



Patrick Stewart: Who do we have directing this episode?

Jonathan Frakes: Rian Johnson.

LeVar Burton: The Last Jedi guy?

Brent Spiner: I believe he also did the Breaking Bad episode, "Fly."

Patrick Stewart: Oh, well, that explains things.



Riker: Captain, are you sure a fan dance will be necessary for this mission?

Data: Sir, I am confused as to the reason why you would perform the dance here.

Picard: No one appreciates art anymore!



This week on Shark Tank: The Next Generation

Data: It is a hearing aid receiving dish that fits behind your ear so you can hear better.

Picard: I see, have you put a lot of time into this?

Geordi: We've been working on this on and off for the past 4 years.

Data: We realize there are significant design and function problems with it, however, we have had limited time to devote to it. Therefore, we are hoping, in addition to financing, you would reduce our shifts until the product is ready.

Picard: You two are not entrepreneurs; you're a want-repreneurs!

 

Picard: This is the 24th Century. We don't use money.

 

PICARD: Data, get that damn cat off the ceiling.

 

Geordi: Then what is he doing here? *points to Quark*

Quark: You may not use money, but the Ferengi and most of the other races do! Do you think moons are free?

 

Data: As Donald Sutherland correctly pointed out, SHE stole the cookie from the cookie jar.

Geordi: Look! My VISOR is also a laser pointer!

 

New Contest!

 

I know this one won't count (too late) but I had to do it anyway


Riker: .....when she told me to..
Data: Walk this way
LaForge: Walk this way
Data: Walk this way
LaForge: Walk this way
Picard: Ah, just give me a kiss, like this

 

I'm wondering, what kind of panel decides the winners?