Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #452: Leap Day!

[LeadHead]

Hello and apologies to everyone! I'm sorry I didn't get the new contest up and running this weekend. Real life got in the way.

EDIT: Winners are here!

First up to the plate, we have the "Important Conclusions" Award, going to Inflatabledalek for:

Geordi: After an extensive 12 hour level one diagnostic I and my team can confirm the shuttle definitely exploded.



Next, we have the "That probably won't be a critical mistake...." Award, going to Leviathan for:

Tasha <reading fine print>: "To preserve your main character shields, do not open box."



Next, we have the "Foolproof Plans" Award, going to tharpdevenport for:

Geordi: "The shady and suspicious person we took aboard is firing on us!"

Beverly: "Quickly -- hide behind the dangerous containers of unstable substances!"



Next, we have the "A Cargo Space Odyssey" Award, going to Smellincoffee for:

Ferengi: My god, it's full of stars!


Next, we have the "The Search for Spot" Award, going to Vanyel for:

Geordi: No. Spots not in here either.



Our Photoshop Award, goes to Nerys Myk for:

FERENGI: Rings? Are they gold pressed latinum?

Our winner is Finn for:

First Officer's log: Perhaps it was kind of mean telling those two that the cargo we got at Starbase 47 would help them find a woman.

Due to my tardiness, I have brought forth 3 winners of the KBL!

The First KBL goes to Seven of Five for:

Geordi: So my yellow rook takes your blue pawn.
Beverly: We really need a better hobby.


The Second KBL goes to Gep Malakai for:

RIKER: Put it all on eBay. The Trekkies will pay a fortune for it.


And our final KBL goes to Hux for:

Yar: I don't know why Riker thinks I'm a bad security officer. Anyway, what should I do with this bomb?



Many thanks to everyone who participated and congrats to our winners! Now, since this is leap day and it only comes once every four years, lets have our heroes take a leap! (or get thrown)

Enjoy!

 

[LeadHead]

It's always a struggle to tell your siblings when it's time for them to leave.

Ro: I know that you're not supposed t do that to a superior officer, but Data, you're my hero.

Worf: Great job throwing Riker across the room. How bout a handshak- HEY!

O'Brien was off his game today...

Riker: Data, no! I said Tasha is throwing herself at you, not "Throw Tasha!"

 

[jep]

"Dude, this is the 8th take of this scene, and you've grabbed my junk in every one of them."

.

 

[Captain April]

*music* and I... had the time of my life...
Dammit, Swayze makes this look so easy.

 

[jep]

"Wow, looks like someone had too much of the chili and beans last night..."


.

 

[Nerys Myk]

Even in the 24th Century, Wrestling looked fake.

 

[Nerys Myk]

WORF: Every effing time!

 

[jep]

Not only was Worf out, but for the second year in a row his poor base running skills resulted in the security departments loss in the ships inter-department baseball tournament.


.

 

[Finn]

Second Officer's Log: I had the dream where I had enough of Commander Riker's planting his crotch close to my face, again. What makes it weird is that I think I heard Counselor Troi's mother telling me to be careful or she wouldn't get grandchildren milliseconds before I gained consciousnesses.

 

[JirinPanthosa]

Data and Lore finally bonded over their shared love for ballet.

DATA: Feel my muscle, sir. *flexes* *WAP*

RIKER (Offscreen): My god, they adapt so quickly. They already know to kill the redshirt and injure Worf!

For a few months in 2366, Riker got REALLY into parkour.

Tasha's foray into parkour didn't go quite as well.

 

[Smellincoffee]

Worf, midflight: *sigh*

Riker: Mind if I drop in?
.

Data: Lore, we are both fully mature beings. I see no reason to engage in this violent horseplay common to boyhood.

Worf: That is not flying! That is...falling with style.

 

[shivkala]

Data: This is why I said we should practice our water ballet routine in water.

Lore: For the last time, Data, if we can master it out of the water, we'll definitely nail it in the water!

Data: Oh, I am Data the CONN officer,
I am Data the CONN officer.
I am strong to the finish
Because I eat all of my spinach.
I am Data the CONN officer.

Worf: Security Officer's Log-Okay, think fast Worf, you ran towards the Borg, but were then thrown across the bridge. What can I say is without honor to cover my failure this time? The Borg? Eh, I feel like that's too easy. Unruly guests? Too "Sitcom Neighbor-y." Ah, I got it, forcefields! Forcefields are without honor!

Like Arthur Dent before him, Riker was about to learn the secret of flying is to throw yourself at the ground and miss. Luckily for him, he had many a memory of a loose alien woman to distract him at that key moment.

Denise Crosby: And they wonder why I'm quitting the show!

 

[LeadHead]

Winners have been posted in the first post of the contest!

 

[Nerys Myk]

TROY: Will, mother's here. Will? Will?

 

[tharpdevenport]

"Lore, now is not the time to practice our ballet routine."

Riker: "OW! My stinknuts!"

 

[Triskelion]

Borg: WE ARE BORG.
Another Borg: YOU WILL BECOME ONE WITH THE BORG.
HR officer: Well, which is it? "Borg" or "The Borg"? I don't want my report to sound racist.
Borg: It is" Borg".
Borg2: It is "The Borg".
Borg: It is" Borg".
Borg2: It is "The Borg".
Borg: It is" Borg".
Borg2: It is "The Borg".
<Borg cube explodes>
HR Officer: That's right, bitches. Klingon Kung Fu my EOE compliance report-filing ass.

Data: Wait - Is that Ensign Ro's sports bra?
Riker: Data, you used a contraction.
Ro: Yes he did, Will.
Data: He did will what? That is an egregious error of tense usage.
Ro: It never was. And just say "use" for Feklar's sake.
Data: Adverb of frequency for a single point reference? I don't think so.
Ro: There, you did it again!
Data: My optolythic Data rod I did.
Riker: Yes you did, you said "I don't think so." Admit it!
Ro: And was that optolythic data rod with a capital D? Cause it kinda sounded like it was a capital D.
Data: I said 'optolythic data rod' and before that I said, 'I donut think so.'
Ro: What the flux is that supposed to mean?!
Data: I am considering a nickname, Donut.
Ro: No, you just made that up. Admit you used a contraction.
Data: I will not.
Ro: Yes you will!
Data: No, he Will, you Ro, and me Donut.
Picard: Object pronouns sans verbs? What is this, the paleolithic era?
Data: It is era, not ear-a. And while we're on the subject, it's schedule not shedule, and hey, how about a please once in a while Mister Make It So??
Picard: That's Captain Make-It-So, Lieutenant Donut. And you just used another contraction! You said 'it's'!
Data: No, I, Donut, think you heard me correctly. I said 'its' the possessive form as in, 'The word schedule, which belongs to the English language'!
Ro: Federation Standard.
Data: Are you still here??! Go put your head in a replicator and hit 'recycle' again.
Wesley: Technically? You don't 'recycle again', you just recycle. It's a fact.
All: SHUT UP WESLEY!
Picard: Oh let's be on our way. PRETTY PLEASE WITH SUGAR ON TOP?? OH I'M SORRY - WITH A COMPLEX POLYSACCHARIDE-CARBON DIOXIDE REACTION ON TOP?? LIEUTENANT COMMANDER DONUT?
Riker: Set course for that spatial eddie.
Data: <Thwack> It is Donut, not 'Special Eddie'. You majestic douchebag.
Riker: I...didn't...call you...'Special Eddie'!
Data: Yes, you did!
Picard: No, he Will! Make it so!
.
.
.
Ro: I want my sports bra back.

Lore: Don't hit me with your Data stream this time. And yes, I used a capital D.

Riker: Those hedges need pruning.

 

[Seven of Five]

Thanks for the win LeadHead.

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

You haven't performed the Kama Sutra until you've read it in the original Positronic Hexcode...

Data: "For the last time, will you get those damned stinknuts out of my face... Sir!"

Security Officer's Log: Got my ass pwned by a Borg drone today. Just have to get whooped by a Kazon and a Talaxian, and I'll have completed my Delta Quadrant bonus card.

First Officer's Log: Discovered today that Edoite women take 'tossed off' literally. Also discovered that they are surprising strong. On the plus side, Worf has ticked another race off his Beta Quadrant pwned card.

Security Officer's Log: A kick to the nuts, an elbow to the face, and then I finished him off with a flying bodyslam. That Worf is some kind of masochist. What I don't get is that he asked to borrow a pen afterwards.

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Not only was Worf out, but for the second year in a row his poor base running skills resulted in the security departments loss in the ships inter-department baseball tournament.


.

Sisko os "'Death to the opposition' my ass!"

 

[jep]

Tasha's night job.... because the shirts may not be red anymore, but the pay still stinks.

.