Star Trek XI Caption Contest #2: ... Lest Ye Be Judged

Spock: "I'm sorry, I was looking for Traffic Court 5A. I must be in the wrong.... saaayyyyy those are some sweet bowl cuts you guys are sporting!"


.

 

S'KUP: Good one, sir.

SRACIST: I haven't said anything yet!

 

SRACIST: I said, "No refunds without a receipt!"[/QUOTE]


SRACIST: I hereby banish you to the Forbidden Zone.

SPOCK: You're no Marlon Brando and this is not Krypton... although it does look like it... and you do suffer the same fate... and...

 

SPOCK: The Forbidden Zone is from Planet of the Apes. The PHantom Zone is from Superman.

S'KUP: Shall I strike him sir?

SRACIST: repeatedly

 

SPOCK: Everybody likes a little black ass (I do), but nobody likes a smartass.

[Good catch! I need a research assistant.]

 

Makeup guy: Wow. Ya know, I've done makeup for lots of actors. But I never thought I'd get to work on a doctor.

Nimoy: For the last time, I'm the other Spock.

 

Sracist: "'Jungle fever'? That's your only defense?"




Sarek: "It is not entirely my son's fault, Minister. I'm afraid this kind of thing runs in our family. My wife Amanda is very fond of young black girls, too."

 

Took me a while to figure out what this reminded me of ...




Speter Smarshall: "Circle gets the square! And the win!"
Spock, to Sarek: "You are not my father."






Makeup Guy: "My mother was an extra on Mission:Impossible ... dad."
Nimoy: "Son?"
Makeup Guy, weeping: "PAPA!"
<They embrace.>







Scotty: "This way, ye sweater-vested wanker."

 

SAREK: T'Paul Lynd for the block.

SPETER SMARSHALL: Thats the Secret Square!

T'PAUL: Thats not my only secret Sarry.

 

Nimoy: "Sirtis said my penises are bigger than yours."

Frakes: "Just when I thought my life and career couldn't suck any more."

 

^^^ I had no idea. "Ralph Pierre LaCock"? That's fucked up.

And I think I can say without a doubt that no one on the planet in the history of man has ever put Vulcan ears on Peter Marshall.




Spock: "Eat shit, LaCock. You're no John Davidson. And your head's way to goddamned big, too."






Sukup: "Ever since he punched me at school, I new he'd fail."




Speter Smarshall: "Circle gets the square and the win! Sorry, Sarek."
Sukup: "I hope you like Rice-A-Roni, bitch."

 

S'racist: "Would you like fries with that?"

Spock: "Yes, and a hot apple pie."

 

Nimoy (thinking): Shit, even when filming a behind the scenes documentary Abrams can't keep the camera level.

 

Sracist: "Can you show me on the doll where Ambassador Archer touched you?"




Makeup Man: "All your wrinkles remind me: I need to get my baby circumcised."

 

MAKEUP: This guy gives me an idea for an alien in the bar scene.

 

S'racist: "..and you say that the return on our initial investment of over 500% is guaranteed?"

Spock: "Indeed. He has given me a list of satisfied customers; however, we must hurry as he needs the money before the close of the day so as to secure our place."

T'lefty: "It sounds.....logical."

T'Righty: "Indeed."

 

Sracist: "A black girl, eh? Logic dictates I ask if she has an available mother or perhaps auntie ... <wiggles eyebrows>"




Sracist: "A black girl, eh? I prefer Greek women. For the excess body hair. And the anal."
Sarek: "I whipped out my IDIC on a few Puerto Rican ladies, before I met your mother. SPICY! <all laugh> The sex was great, but having my nose broken really sucked."
Sukup: "Uh, I, uh, once asked out a Jewish woman."
Sracist: "Shut up, you."

 

MAKEUP GUY: "Why the long face?"

 

FIRST MINISTER:"...and even though you did not successfully complete the Kolinahr, we hope you will be satisfied with a compensation prize on behalf of this entire governing council...

A year's suppy of Rice-a-Roni, the Starfleet Headquarters Treat!"