Contest: ENTER Voyager Caption Contest #250: The One with the AI enhanced WMD

[Orac]

Welcome to the 250th Star Trek Voyager Caption Contest!

This contest will feature pictures from the 5th season episode of Star Trek Voyager: Warhead

But first here're th' winners of the last contest:

The highly prestigious award for Best Fart Joke goes to @tharpdevenport with:

Ready to lift a buttcheek up at moment's notice, Janeway waited patiently for Tuvok to fart, knowing it would be her chance to get away with it and he'd surely be to blame.


@Leviathan wins third prize with:

Janeway: Yes, it's a tribble on my head....I'm a Delta Quadrant trend-setter.


@Laura Cynthia Chambers wins second prize with:

"I think something's wrong with the channel changer..."


And the winner is @Nerys Myk with:

Oh, I see you checking out my bun.


Congratulations to the winners!



Here're th'new pictures:

Bonus Picture:

 

[Leviathan]

Thanks for the award!

EMH: The device calls itself the "Probe-u-lator"...

 

[tharpdevenport]

"I suppose I could re-program myself so it'll fit in..."

Tom: "Look -- how are we supposed to have a Tuvok fart joke if Tuvok isn't in any of the photos?"

 

[Nerys Myk]

PARIS: She said you two were on a break!!!

EMH: Why does it keep asking if we'd like fries with that?

 

[tharpdevenport]

Tom: "Harry, I'm trying to tell you, you just bend over, he'll do this with his hand, and you cough."

Harry: "I'm going to wait for the Doctor to be fixed, thanks."

 

[Oddish]

Congratulations to the winners, and thanks to @Orac for getting us to 250 contests and counting.

We're starting with a continuation of last contest's gruesome display. I've taken the liberty of importing it, so you can see the whole story.

JANEWAY: "I'm in the mood for an exotic breakfast to go with my coffee... I think I'm going to eat roasted heart of Harry Kim."

EMH: "Neelix, you absolute nincompoop! When the captain said she wanted heart of Harry Kim for breakfast, she didn't mean it literally!"
NEELIX: "But I roasted it in a nice delicate lemon-mint sauce."

TUVOK: "Lieutenant Commander Tuvok's personal log. Despite the tragic fate of Ensign Kim, the captain has decided that she cannot punish Mr. Neelix for the dubious dish he cooked. She did, after all, request it of him. A memorial service for the unfortunate ensign is scheduled for 1930 hours this evening."

TOM: "I still can't believe it. You killed my best friend, roasted his heart like a leg of lamb, and served it to the captain. What kind of man does that?"
NEELIX: "The kind who follows his captain's orders! The captain wanted roasted heart of Harry Kim, so that's what I gave her!"

HARRY (enters): "Oh, hey you guys. I heard you arguing. What's wrong?"
TOM: "H-h-harry?!"
HARRY: "Yeah."
TOM: "What... what are you doing here?!"
NEELIX: "Yeah, really! You died! I carved out your heart myself!"
HARRY: "Oh, that. The captain just opened up a portal to an alternate timeline and grabbed another version of me. I guess I die so often, she needs a way to replace me. She says that in theory, I should have an unlimited number of potential replacements."
TOM: "You do know that this is seriously weird, right?"
HARRY: "We're Starfleet officers, Tom. Weird is part of the job."

 

[Orac]

I've posted 50 of these contests now..

Does anyone here know how many my predecessor @Catarina did before retiring?

Search results only go back a decade to contest #146 in 2016 for me. --> link

In space no one can hear your ennui.

 

[Leviathan]

Starfleet Fun fact: The notorious arms dealer "Cowboy" was in fact Dr. Zimmerman's great great great great great great great great grandfather.

 

[Leviathan]

Harry: ...the warhead is incredibly destructive...it contains all of Tuvoks farts.

 

[tharpdevenport]

Doctor: "Did you just set it to vibrate and enter the coordinates to your quarters for the transporter?"

 

[Leviathan]

Kim: It says it will detonate unless the person withe tricorder is immediately promoted to commander.

 

[Orac]

Tiny cock rocket: Are you my mother?

 

[tharpdevenport]

Tiny cock rocket: Are you my mother?

Big Cock Rocket: "Whyt, yes I am."

Tiny Cock Rocket: "Then who is my father?"

Doctor: .....

 

[Oddish]

EMH: "I'm a doctor, not a Jedi master."

 

[Laura Cynthia Chambers]

Doctor: "Which is bad, Harry? Red sky at night or morning?"
Kim: "Ugh! Thanks a lot, Doc, now I have to input the deactivation sequence all over again!"

 

[tharpdevenport]

"Look -- I don't even know why we even talk to you anymore. Number one: you're leaving the ship. And good riddance. Number two: you've been voted one of the Top 5 annoying characters in Star Trek."

 

[Laura Cynthia Chambers]

"Uhhh....guys, maybe right next to the warp core isn't the best place to defuse a bomb....just saying..."

 

[tharpdevenport]

doctor: "did you just ask the rocket 'Why can't I quit you?'?"