Star Trek 2009 is my favorite star trek movie. Funny thing, I watched it with low expectations thinking I'd like it just because I'm biased about Trek, but it surprised me. For a movie that is often belittled as having no depth and being just about action, it honestly made me feel more emotions that other movies in the genre. The opening scene for one, everything about Spock (including the final moment with Sarek) , the characters, the interpersonal relationships.. not a flawless movie but one I could watch forever.
Nero is my fav villain (and the most convincing) of the trilogy. I feel that guy, you want to hate him for what he did but also hope there will be a kelvin version of him somewhere that will get another chance and happier life.
At any rate, we're shown that they were clearly well-acquainted--perhaps even friends to the extent that Spock's characteristic reserve would make such an arrangement possible--but we really see nothing which suggests that a romantic relationship of any kind existed (or could exist) prior to the turbolift scene.
Whether or not the possibility of anything beyond friendship had ever consciously occurred to Uhura before might be debated, but what we see could also be simply her attempt to comfort someone she considers a friend, who has within a short span of time been dealt a series of heavy blows which have driven him to the point of emotional compromise. Uhura might not fully comprehend what it meant, but she would know enough to understand that the combination of events represented a serious shock to a Vulcan, and as a friend she would offer such support as she was able to muster on the spot.
This, too, would not be at odds with what we were shown in TOS.
To me, the movie strongly hints they have a relationship already since the Farragut scene (the script characterizes their relationship as a secret that the turbolift scene reveals to us), and that's
WHY Uhura kisses him in the turbolift and
HE kisses her back.
The intimacy between them is such that it would be a stretch even for common friends to act like that, but with
Spock it becomes even more unlikely they'd act with each other that way
unless there is something already (also see his body language on the transport pad. That's a man who hugged and kissed his girlfriend many times)
No one who knows the vulcans, let alone Uhura, would touch and kiss them that way unless they were their mate. Especially not in that moment. She does that because it's appropriate to their relationship, because they had done that before. Because she knows he'd be comfortable with her doing that.
Tptb put more than a hint they are a couple and they tried to be as explicit as they could get without being too over the top with it. The fact they knew each other at the Academy and worked together there is, if anything, a good set up for their romance providing a context where it might have happened.
I don't see the issue with them simply being a couple before the destruction of vulcan.
Frankly, the fact they have a relationship, thus interact that way with each other because of mutual romantic feelings, is more respectful to the characters for me and has more integrity from a writing perspective for tptb. If you want to give Spock a real romance (unlike the usual Chapel) you gotta commit to it.. and it would be too 'safe' to use the excuse he only gets with her because he's emotionally compromised. I'm sure tos purists would love it but JJ&Co didn't want to be safe, they (commentary) declared that putting them into an intimate relationship and saying that they are in love was 'the gutsiest thing they did even before destroying vulcan'.
I think the point is this Spock is simply having his own story and agency that differs from that of tos Spock a bit resulting in him making different choices, including that of having a relationship with a human (perhaps because he fell in love while tos Spock never did with his love interest). It's a Spock who is more embracing of his human side before the destruction of vulcan. This is not tos where big emotional moments are blamed on external influences because that's how the 60s developed 'the alien'. And Uhura isn't a Chapel or Leila Kalomi (or any of the disposable love interests from tos, tbh)
