Movie Caption Contest #34: Fixer-upper

[The Cutest of Borg]

"'Let's see what she's got,' said the captain, and I'm gointae find out!"

or

"Just lie still lass! I'll have those sex beads out in no time."

 

[battrekker]

Thank you very much, our faithless and fearful captioner leader.
Let's be random again

"The designer of this tool must be a fan of the Lord of the Rings by the way it's shaped! What a loser, he should get a life!

 

[Candlelight]

"Can I turn around yet, Number One? I'm eager to see the gift you got me from our colony on Acme VII"

 

[Nerys Myk]

After demolishing the stage and finishing half a song Jean-Luc Rotten stormed off the stage.

 

[Outpost4]

Berman could have done a better job of pitching Stewart on Generations, Part II.

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Picard: "Oh well, better get out the old putty knife"

 

[Shatmandu]

Scotty: "Hmm. Uhura has her own brand of condoms ..."

 

[Triskelion]

[Image removed per board rules]
Captain Picard's mid-life crisis was not a pretty sight.

 

[Triskelion]

Bloody hell. I've gone and cracked the chronoton assembly! One a' you steamin' blootered numpties fetch the bloody duct tape!

 

[Outpost4]

"My chair squeaks, he says. Yer fat ass squeaks, I says."

 

[Outpost4]

Picard was glad he had passed on the damage waiver with Hertz Rent-A-Starship.

 

[EliyahuQeoni]

The real reason Scotty could multiply his repair estimates by a factor of four...

 

[Rat Boy]

[Removed per board rules]
Captain Picard's mid-life crisis was not a pretty sight.

Well, maybe if you don't look at the middle of the picture.

 

[Candlelight]

Picard emerged from his house to see he'd accidentally landed on the wicked witch of the west.

 

[cooleddie74]

"This is the last bloody time I rig Sulu's helm panel to get free pay-per-view and basic cable!!"

"Damned Starfleet contractors.

Five weeks...and they still haven't moved my table where I wanted it."

 

[cultcross]

"I can't believe they think I don't know jack about the 24th century, wait till they see my upgrade to their bridge!"

"Mr. SCOTT!!!!"

 

[cooleddie74]

"I knew it.

Bloody knew it.

That Mister Sulu...he got lo mein noodle sauce ALL in the duotronic circuitry housing."

"Did Commander Riker throw a party when I specifically ordered him NOT to?

Dammit.

This is the last time I go on shore leave and leave Will in command!"

 

[CaptainJon]

This is what happens when ships are made by 23rd century monkeys.

This is what happens when the ship is put together by 24th century monkeys.

 

[Candlelight]

Picard just couldn't get enough of his favourite show, Engineers Gone Wild.

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

All that Scotch had to catch up with him sometime...