Movie Caption Contest #150: The FAIL Frontier

[Gorn Captain]

Leonard, you go ahead and make a Star Trek reboot without me someday. It won't change the fact that right now I'm fifty five goddamn years old and I look like I'm in college, and you look like Bea Arthur in a black wig...

 

[BriGuy]

Bartender: So... would you call those clitori?

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Bartender: Go dance on the goddamn pool table — customers keep complaining about furballs in their drinks!

 

[Rat Boy]

Yarna d'al' Gargan: "Screw this. I'm going to go dance at Jabba the Hutt's Palace."

Kirk: "So...did you hear that Sulu only likes to squeeze people's cheeks and beat off?"

Spock: "Why are you talking to me?!"

Chekov: "She has vonderful muscles."

Sulu: "Yeah, but her ass is as flat as the hangar deck."

*Vixis turns, kicks them both in the nuts*

 

[BriGuy]

Come on, Spock, don't get so upset. I was exaggerating when I told the crew that anytime we got into a tough spot, I'd send you to take care of it because if you die we can just bring you back to life. Of course I don't want you to die... again...

 

[BriGuy]

Perhaps explaining the change in attitude from V to VI:

Sulu: Come on, Chekov, give them a chance. Even the captain is willing to try...

Chekov: OK, OK... I will... but I hope they don't have bad table manners... that is one thing I know I and the captain can not stand.

 

[BriGuy]

What's is it Spock? You look like you've just seen a YouTube video of your mother having sex with the Andorian ambassador.

 

[SRFX]

Kirk: "So did you like my movie?"
Spock: "No."

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Chekov: "She's got thighs like Wenus Villiams..."
Sulu: "Shame she hasn't got the balls."

 

[cooleddie74]

NIMOY: Don't speak to me, Bill.


You couldn't direct your way out of a wet paper bag.

 

[cooleddie74]

CHEKOV: I hear her ponytail functions as sort of a sex handle.

SULU: You mean, like Mike's down on Deck 19?

 

[Nerys Myk]

SULU: I think she heard you

 

[LeadHead]

Chekov: She has vonderful muscles, and a terrible Make-up artist.

 

[TeaKirk]

Kirk: Cheer up Birthday Boy

Spock: *Grumbles* I hate you Jim

 

[Isis]

CHEKOV: <lame sexist comment>
SULU: <tired gay joke>

Kirk: <witty joke at Spock's expense with possibly some 20th century reference>
Spock: <mandatory raised eyebrow>

Spock: "So there are formulae for writing these captions. Fascinating."

 

[cooleddie74]

CHEKOV: I heard if you suckle her ponytail REAL Bloodwine comes out. It's like a beer tap.

SULU: I'd be REALLY good at that!

CHEKOV: No kidding.

KIRK: Something wrong? Tell me.

SPOCK: We're in this movie, Jim.

And there's no conceivable way OUT.

 

[Nerys Myk]

KIRK: Oooo, does Mister Plomeek Head have his angry eyes in?

 

[cooleddie74]

KIRK: What's wrong? You look like you've just seen a ghost.

SPOCK: Yes. The early 21st century Earth movie PARANORMAL ACTIVITY.

Ninety minutes of my life I will never get back.

 

[cooleddie74]

CHEKOV: I don't care vat anyone else says.

Lady Gaga's still GOT it.

 

[Isis]

Sulu: "Just be careful if you find yourself in a turbolift with her. The other day she moved over to let someone off and practically knocked my eye out."