ARCHER: Could you help? We need some decon gel on us. T'POL: I will not touch your smelly, hairy... SATO: I've got a black belt in Aikido. ARCHER: Oh... I see. [T'POL: The stench would last for weeks.]
ARCHER: Porthos needs one of you to rub some decon gel on his crank. HOSHI: I fell for that with YOU, sir. I've learned my lesson.
Archer: (Over comm) What is it Malcolm? Reed: Not sure, but it's got writing on it "Notice of Visit By Starfleet Census Bureau." Hoshi: Do we really have to bathe each other in front of you? Archer: Don't forget the cameras. Phlox said that it's a classic canine healing technique. Also most people were underwhelmed by our visit to Risa, now get to it! Captains Starlog Supplemental, we had to make a return to the planet we had recently investigated. T'Pol made the mistake of leaving her tree samples out in the open on my dog walking route with Porthos.
Archer: "Word around the ship is that you two have been selling something called a 'deluxe decon with full release' for 400 credits each. Care to explain that?"
Reed: "Every time I rub the end of this projection, it extends out a little farther." T'Pol (on radio): "That seems familiar to me..." Trip: "Ahem!" T'Pol (embarrassed): "Oh...right..."
Reed to Captain Archer... Sir, this gumball machine prize is IMPOSSIBLE to crack. We'll never get the bloody temporary tattoos and gum out of the thing.
HOSHI: How long is it? ARCHER: That's a rather personal question... HOSHI: No, I mean how long have we been in here. ARCHER: I don't know, maybe a month. T'POL: It's been 26 days. HOSHI: Wow, someone should end this caption contest.
Alrik (os/rl): "I know, I know, son's graduation a reception last weekend. Been kinda burried." Hoshi: "You know...excuses are like assholes......everyone's got one." Alrik (os/rl): "Touche` . I'll swap it out this week."
Hoshi: Captain, it's been a month and we've only been allowed to wear these clothes. We demand you put a Nordstrom in here!