Archer: "What's the matter? You don't think you could fill my shoes?" T'Pol: "In the context of assuming command of your ship, I surely could. However, in your context of a 'two girls/one cup' variation, forget it!!"
Archer: "Well, we're gonna be in here for a while. What can we do to kill the time? Hey, you guys ever watch 'Sesame Street'? Why don't we play our own little version of 'One of These Things Is Not Like the Others'?"
Archer: "Man, this contest has been going on a long time! I'd have been long gone by now if Hoshi didn't look so yummy in her skivvies." T'Pol: "Hey! What am I - chopped liver?!" Archer: "No offense, T'Pol. It's just that I've got a bad case of that Yellow Fever, ya know what I mean?" Hoshi: "Congratulations, Captain. You just struck out with both of us."
HOSHI: This contest's been going on for so long I think the alien bacteria on our skins died of old age.
Bakula: How long have we been in here? Blalock: Over a month now. Park: I know UPN wanted us to spend more time in here but this is ridiculous!
I'm starting to learn how Tour Guide Barbie feels. All of this smiling does take its toll on your cheek muscles!
Due to a terrible miscalculation of scale, the GALACTIC EMPIRE's newest Death Star was destroyed by a hapless armory officer. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy states that this sort of thing happens all the time.
ARCHER: T'Pol, please tell me that Alrik guy is showing up on your scans. T'POL: Negative, Captain TRIP: Sonnavabitch
Archer: (over comm) Malcolm, you've been working on defusing that mine for over a month now. What's the holdup? Reed: One part of the defusing process is that there needs to be a Photoshopped entry into the Caption Contest. Archer: (over comm) Is that what Alrik is waiting for too?
Hoshi: "Alrik? We're still here because you're waiting for Alrik? Alrik tried to stiff us on paying for his 'deluxe decon with full release' last week." T'Pol: "You won't be seeing Alrik around here any more."
Archer: "Ah, the female form is truly a thing of beauty!" T'Pol: "Yes, Hoshi and I think so, too." Hoshi: "Get the picture, loser?"