Caption Contest 17: Frontin'

[cooleddie74]

"Observe, Jonathan.

Here is a group of historians witnessing the construction of the Great Pyramid at Giza...over there, one of my own colleagues is in Dallas, Texas on November 22, 1963 to view the assassination of American President John Kennedy.

And this one over here? The green one?

That's the day Britney gave K-Fed the ultimatum to stop freebasing and buy a new pair of underwear."

 

[cooleddie74]

T'Pol could never stand Trip's long-winded ramblings about his sister Lizzy's old boyfriend with the awesome collection of hovercars and nine-inch member.

 

[Alyssa]

Trip: OH MY GOD!! Who programmed the transporter to beam the captain back in ass-less leather chaps and a gimp mask?

 

[cooleddie74]

DANIELS:"See this?"

ARCHER:"Ummm...yeah?"

DANIELS:"This is the moment in Earth history when people finally realized after so many wasted years that going to music concerts expecting only to hear 'the classic stuff' was a counterproductive and tragic philosophy."

 

[cooleddie74]

"WHO opened my last box of Boo Berry, dammit?!"

 

[Nerys Myk]

ARCHER: Iowa?

DANIELS: On the ground.

ARCHER: Iowa. On the ground.

DANIELS: Told you not touch anything!

 

[cooleddie74]

ARCHER:"So...when will I die?"

DANIELS:"There are multiple possibilities ranging anywhere from the next few years all the way up to the year 2245. Two involve a German prostitute and asphyxiation. The others...I'd rather not say."

 

[Alrik]

DAMN IT! Where did my centerfolds go?.........And why is there a picture of Surak there now???

 

[cyph]

DANIELS: Dude

ARCHER: Duuuude!

WIN!!!!!

 

[Nerys Myk]

TRIP: Who assigned Crewman Rand to transporter control?

 

[cooleddie74]

DANIELS:"Right here in the timestream is the moment that Zefram Cochrane got so drunk while constructing his first warp ship that he inadvertently slapped a I (HEART) URANUS bumper sticker on a rear panel."

 

[cooleddie74]

Trip soon regretted gobbling down an entire extra-large bowl of Chef's chili and oyster crackers before jogging to the cargo bay.

 

[Quagmire58]

I think the on switch for the hand dryer is over here.

Trip: Sorry Captain, I didn't know you were in the Sonic Shower.

T'Pol (to self): I didn't know Sonic Showers caused shrinkage.

 

[Nerys Myk]

TRIP: Damn Tokyo is a trashed. Would't wanna clean that up!

T'POL: I think we have bigger problems.

 

[cooleddie74]

DANIELS:"Dude...this stash is so awesome...it's like I can SEE the causes of World War I !!"

TRIP:"WHOA.

That has got to be the biggest turd I have EVER seen anywhere."

T'POL:"Please, Surak. Come down from the afterlife and save me from this moron."

 

[cooleddie74]

"Whatever you do, Jonathan...DON'T touch this avatar here. All I can say is, I don't feel like memorizing a bunch of new Presidents and Emperors when I get home...

and I know you'd rather not glow in the dark with gills."

 

[Gil T.Azell]

"And if you look closely, Jonathan, you'll notice we're about to witness the moment in history when American President Bill Clinton found a most ingenious use for a cigar..."

^ WINNER!!!

 

[Nebusj]

Submitted for a friend to whom I relay some of these threads, a pair of alternatives:

``Look! Not-porn!''

and, alternatively,

``Ted Stevens was right! It is a series of tubes!''

 

[cooleddie74]

"...and right here, Jonathan, is when my colleague Captain Braxton was accidentally thrown back in time via a paradox to 20th century Earth...where he did more drugs than the Manson Family at Ike Turner's place."

 

[cooleddie74]

TV's BLOOPERS AND PRACTICAL JOKES

This week...ENTERPRISE's Jolene Blalock slaps a "Kick Me" sign on co-star Connor Trinneer's back and hilarity ensues!