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Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #550: Q? Q!

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encyclopedia salesman?
 
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PICARD: Lieutenant? Status.
LAFORGE: It seemed to make a visual survey of the engine core, sir, then it moved in here.
Q: Interesting, isn't it? Not a he, not a she. Not like anything you've ever seen. An enhanced humanoid.
PICARD: What is it you want? We mean you no harm. Do you understand me?
Q: Understand you? You're nothing to him. He's not interested in your life form. He's just a scout, the first of many. He's here to analyse your technology. He may attempt to gain control of the ship. I wouldn't let him.
PICARD: Hold on, let me try something
Q: Ah, the Patty Cake gambit.
 
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Picard: Dress down Friday has gone too far.


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Q: So what's the first thing you think of when I mention Counsellor Troi?


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Picard: What I really want is a dune buggy.


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Picard: What's that in the corner?

Q: I'm human now and you put me in a cell without a toilet.


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Picard: I did no inhale.
 
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Picard: "What is it with you and your trust issues?"
Q: "I could ask you the same thing about cheating at Scrabble. By the way, "jzqxkyv" isn't a word."
Picard: "You did that on purpose!"
 
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Q: Oh, by the way. I walked through the stables on the way here.
PICARD: Damn it Q! That desk is an antique!
 
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Picard: "Q -- what are you reading?"

Q: "The long history of the Picard. It's really quite fascinating, actually. From the Picard who stood up to oppression, fought in war, died for what was right, to the Picard's who sat around and made wine and then all burned to death in a fire because they shunned basic technology like a fire technology and water sprinklers. It putters out around the end with you telling your most trusted friend to 'Shut up' during a wedding. That knife through the heart when you were younger is looking more like the high-point of your life now that I think about it."
 
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PICARD: Q! What are you up to?
Q: Just looking through your Yearbook. Drama club. Who knew?
PICARD: Drama club...Oh, god. no!
 
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