Contest: ENTER Voyager Caption Contest #246: The Nuclear Waste Disposal Allegory

[Spirit of Christmas Futur]

Tuvok: Coffee breath to the left of me, Smokers breath to the right of me...

 

[tharpdevenport]

SMALL SHUTTLE SHAPED LIKE A SHOPPING CART COMES WANDERING OVER

Tuvok: "Captain, we are receiving a hail."

Janeway: "On screen."

Intersteller Panhandler: "Can you spare any credits?"

 

[Adventerprise]

The Doctor (offscreen): "I don't get too many cases of freezer burn coming through sickbay."

 

[tharpdevenport]

Torres in a shower with extra high levels of Scrubbing Bubbles after having watched the shuttle security cam footage of Janeway and Paris during their warp 10 ... event...

Torres: "Scrub harder you fucking bubbles!"

 

[Adventerprise]

The Doctor (offscreen): "I warned you there might be some mild side effects..."

 

[The Hanuk Kai]

Picardo: Let me guess: you didn't learn your lines again?
Beltran: No, I didn't.
Picardo: Was it Kate?
Beltran: No.
Picardo: Jeri?
Beltran: No.
Picardo: Roxann?
Beltran: No.
Picardo: Who did this to you?
Beltran: Garrett.
Picardo: You let Garrett Wang beat the crap out of you?
Beltran: Yes.
Picardo: You're luck they let Jennifer go, or else we wouldn't be having this conversation.

Mulgrew: TIm, what's all this fog?
Russ: You know that Irish holodek episode?
Mulgrew: I can't wait for it. I've rehearsed all week. "Delete the wife!" "Delete the wife!"
Russ: It's being replaced. Instead of Ireland, we are doing a Brigadoon inspired episode.
Mulgrew: Not Meridian!

 

[Santa Kang]

Chakotay: And when I woke up I was covered in dirt...
EMH: Sorry, that's on me. You were so stiff and lifeless, I pronounced you dead.

 

[tharpdevenport]

Chakotay: And when I woke up I was covered in dirt...
EMH: Sorry, that's on me. You were so stiff and lifeless, I pronounced you dead.

Woodcotay: "I get that alot."

 

[Leviathan]

Doctor: EMH To Captain, I'm afraid I'll have to euthanize this tree.

 

[Leviathan]

Torres: (Thinking) Why doesn't the transporter biofilter clean this off?

 

[Leviathan]

Tuvok: Is it safe to stand this close to the irradiated patient?
Doctor: Not at all, it induces permanent and uncontrollable flatulence.

 

[Leviathan]

Malon: So, your transporter can undo the Tuvix thing but fixing THIS is a bit too much?

 

[Eagan]

How many times do I have to tell you, Captain? You can't do a mind-meld on yourself!

 

[tharpdevenport]

How many times do I have to tell you, Captain? You can't do a mind-meld on yourself!

"Especially not with those worn out old lady fingers..."

 

[Crazy 4 Xmas Lights]

HARRY: "So the captain yanked out Seven's central nervous system, ripped off Chakotay's arm, and impaled you with a self-sealing stembolt... just because you all made remarks about her fingers."
TUVOK: "Indeed. And I assure you, it was quite painful."

 

[Spirit of Christmas Futur]

Tuvok: Captain, where did the cheese go?

 

[tharpdevenport]

Taking turns trying to figure out just who will administer the enema anally.

 

[Crazy 4 Xmas Lights]

Are there other ways to administer an enema?

 

[tharpdevenport]

When you don't shut up about you promotion and pip, Mistress Janeway shoves it down your throat.

 

[tharpdevenport]

When you've finally saved up enough energy rations to replicate cookies for the crew, but a certain Ensign Kim still manages to burn them with 24th and-a-half century technology.