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Trek Lit Limericks

There once was a Terran named Alice
Used a photon torp for a phallus.
They found her vagina
On New Carolina
And part of her arsehole on Shmallis.

SicOne, one warning for...
 
A certain young Russian named Pavel
Sat there contemplating his navel
Lo! What did he find?
Some vegetables, tinned,
And a magistrate pounding a gavel.

(Well, navel doesn't come close to rhyming with Pavel, and depending who's saying it Pavel doesn't necessarily rhyme with gavel, so why have any rhymes at all?)
 
:lol: Because it's a limerick? Jeez, fellas...there's no such thing as a blank verse limerick, is there? But Sic did start it with his Pavel/navel "rhyme."

Oh, well - it's more important that it be funny than that it rhyme, anyway, and Pavel/navel/find/tinned/gavel is pretty darn funny.
 
I actually KNEW someone would try rhyming "navel" with "Pavel" when I started it.

The next one:

When McCoy first encountered the rabbit
He resisted the urge to just grab it.
 
When McCoy first encountered the rabbit
He resisted the urge just to grab it,
He pulled out a gun
And shot dead a nun
And said, "Got you, you wascally habit!"
 
Janeway and Chakotay
Seemed to be getting on okay
(when off the the cube
went admiral noob
and swiftly was blown away)
 
Tonia Barrows went on shore leave with Bones,
Where she wore sexy torn tunics and hats shaped like cones.
 
A legion of limericks I read
When really, I should be in bed
but oh how I wriggled,
with pleasure I giggled,
Many thanks offered to Ted.

(and everyone else that's contributed.)

I just read 25 pages of these blasted things... Don't think I've ever had more fun on these boards.

Anyway...

Tonia Barrows went on shore leave with Bones,
Where she wore sexy torn tunics and hats shaped like cones.
Don Juan came a lusting
 
Last edited:
Hey, this isn't gonna get me in trouble, is it?

OK, one more, just because you asked.

Ezri Dax offered her honor
Julian honored her offer
And all the night long
Well into the dawn
It was nothing but honor and offer.

OK, that's all I got.
 
There once was a woman named Yar
Whose Starfleet career did not get far
She got very much hurt
And died a la redshirt
By a guy all dressed up in black tar.
 
There was a Ferengi named Daev
Who kept a dead whore in a cave
He said, "What the hell."
"I'll get used to the smell."
"Just thank of all the latinum I'll save!"

Dabo girl Leeta's got game.
What I'd do to her'sa damn shame.
If those aren't D cups,
I'll shut the f&#* up.
Sexist, but hey, me can you blame?

There once was a chief named O'Brien
Who said, "Hey there, folks, why you cryin'?"
He had such bad gas
That when he blew ass
The whole damn bridge crew was just dyin'

Worf had a fearsome reputation
From crew who needed motivation.
"My orders you'll mind"
"Or yourself you will find"
"On the harsh end of the doggie position!"

Counselor Troi's getting old.
She once had a rack that was bold.
But how will they be
When age and gravity
Inevitably claim their hold?

Thank you very much, good night!
 
Ohhhhh-kaaaayyyy...Back to what I think is the active limerick, though I'm all confused now:
Tonia Barrows went on shore leave with Bones,
Where she wore sexy torn tunics and hats shaped like cones.
Don Juan came a-lusting

Then the knight came a-thrusting
 
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