TOS Caption Contest #206: Holiday Free-For-All

[Gary7]

Verne: "You double crosser, Balok. I go to the bathroom for just a few minutes and you make the moves on my girlfriend. Now, get out of my chair!"

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Atoz: Welcome to Horn & Hardart, Captain Kirk.

 

[Nerys Myk]

MCCOY: Hey, baby....I still love ya. Sorry about the "all she left me was my bones" crap and stuff
Who's that in the background? You seeing someone? YOU CHEATING WHORE!!!!!!!

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Early termination fees are disease and danger wrapped in darkness and silence.

 

[Gary7]

Kirk: "Odd... looks like an eclectic collection of props left over from some long defunct science fiction television show."

 

[alte]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #206: Holiday Drink-For-All

 

[Captain Crow]

Kirk: Last time we let Sulu pick the bar.

McCoy: The fact it was called "The Blue Oyster" bar should have been a clue.

Bailey: And when they started to play "El Bimbo" should have been another.

Bele: It all started because they got their chocolate in our peanut butter.

Lokai: No it didn't. It all started because they got their peanut butter in our chocolate.

[Uhura rolls her eyes]

Kirk: Oh for fucks sake.

Kirk: This sucks. We get assigned to transport some stupid wheat with a goofy name, while the Constellation gets assigned to an all nude planet in system L-374. The lucky bastards are probably having the time of their lives.

 

[Gary7]

Kirk (OS): "Bones! What have they done to you?"

McCoy: "It's alright, Jim. I kind of feel like I had another brain booster. The unsavory looks don't really bother me. Only, I seem to have this peculiar craving for eggs."

 

[Nerys Myk]

CHEKOV: How vas I to know it vas a Caitian mating ritual?

MCCOY: At least you didn't wake up from a week long bender on Wrigley's Pleasure Planet married to these two.

 

[Gary7]

Tang. The drink of Starfleet officers.

 

[Gary7]

Kirk: "Is that the new transporter technician?"

McCoy: "The one on her knees facing away from us?"

Bailey: "Yeah, she came aboard last week. She does nice... work."

 

[Nerys Myk]

SPOCK: What is it?

SCOTTY: Its orange.

 

[Captain Crow]

Tang. The drink of Starfleet officers.

McCoy: The poon flavor tastes better than the orange.

 

[Jonas Grumby]

McCoy: "Alright, Ensign Barrows, come on down to sickbay; I can give you an injection of antibiotics that will clear it up. But I have to say I'm very disappointed in you, Tonia. I mean, my God, girl, with a Gorn?! I ought to just let you itch for a week!"

 

[tharpdevenport]

http://img140.imageshack.us/img140/1189/penisrock.png
(possibly not work safe)



Carl Spock couldn't be present today, as he wasn't in the picture...

 

[Isis]

Atoz: "If you brought any books or videos in here, I'm afraid you'll have to buy them."

 

[Isis]

Kyle (OS): "You're all out. I didn't say 'Simon says'."

 

[Alrik]

Scotty: "Here's to ya."

McCoy: "Cheers."

Spock: "I was correct. This is a mimosa...and it is just 8:30 in the morning. How do you two propose to get any work done today?"

Scotty: "Up yer shaft.......Nancy."

 

[LeadHead]

Harry Mudd throwing the electric guitar across the room was very loud. And expensive.

 

[Rat Boy]

Captain Mason: "All right, Commander Cortez, Dr. Gertch, and Lieutenant Tavas; you three will go over that ridge over there. Kristen and I will be in that cave to the south."

Tavas: "Doing what, sir?"

Cortez: *whisper*

Tavas: "Oh."