TOS Caption Contest #133 - Alternate Universe

[Gary7]

Jones: "Now, if we can just get Elton John as the captain..."

Elton: "To heck with being a rocketman. I'm a starship captain!"

 

[Nerys Myk]

Now replace Uhura with Tina Turner

 

[Nerys Myk]

KIRK: Much better. I had a hard time seeing the viewscreen through Micky's fro.

 

[Gary7]

To boldly go, where no music has gone before.

 

[Nerys Myk]

ELTON: Status report.

TINA: Big wheel keep on turning Proud mary keep on burning

 

[Shatmandu]

*God power sound*
<Davey Jones' head bursts, and the others defecate on his corpse.>

 

[Diesel Micky Dolenz]

Kirk: Damn Starfleet Command, I asked for the one with the hat!

 

[Outpost4]

Elton: Lt. Billy Joel, heading 134 mark 8.
Jones: Noooo!
< crash! >
* God power sound *
Mitchell: Fucking overnight crew...

 

[Rat Boy]

Elton John always wanted to get back at Shatner for "Rocket Man," but after Bill's latest album contained covers of "Last Train to Clarksville" and "What's Love Got To Do With It?," he quickly found co-conspirators.

 

[Gary7]

A moment of life aboard Pop Trek

Tina Turner: "Elton baby, I can't get through to Starfleet command. Gettin' nothin' but static-static-static, whooo!"

Elton John: "Oh, that's terrible Tina. I guess that means no orders and we've got the stars to ourselves. Jones, turn 'em on, turn 'em on, turn on those warp engines and let's go way out."

Davy Jones: "Hey, whadda you say we take a break and jam a song or two?"

Elton John: "Davy baby, sorry to say, but you're a make believe singer and way out of our league. Right, Tina?"

Tina Turner: "You said it, sugah!"

 

[Rat Boy]

Not pictured: Science Officer Bob Dylan, Chief Engineer Ozzie Osbourne, Chief Medical Officer Garth Brooks, and Helmsman Mike Shinoda.

 

[cooleddie74]

CAPTAIN JOHN:"You have the conn, Davy. I'll be in my quarters snogging Commander Michael."

 

[cooleddie74]

DAVY:"See, blokes?

I can both sing AND operate complicated equipment!

When do I actually start writing?




Guys?



Hello?"

 

[Shatmandu]

Kirk: "Bring us about to four-two-three-mark-nine."
Jones: "Hang on, luv: I've got to have a session musician push me buttons."

 

[cooleddie74]

KIRK:"Lay in a course for obscurity and VH-1. Warp Six."

 

[Rat Boy]

Jones: "A little more to the left, Uhura. Yeah, that's the stuff!"

Uhura: "Uh, I'm over here."

Jones: "Then who...?"

Sulu: "Oh, my!"

 

[cooleddie74]

DAVY:"Captain! I'm picking up signs of 'Where Are They Now?' activity in this sector...strong indications of old bands being reuinited for one night only!"

 

[Shatmandu]

Davy: "Remember when you went to that planet and grew all old?"
Kirk: "Yes."
Davy: "I know I'll never end up a paunchy, old, bald jerkoff like that."

 

[Cakes488]

Sulu was absolutely THRILLED with the new captain!

 

[Cakes488]

McCoy: Mitchell if you don't vacate the captains chair immediately you're going to force me to do my armpit fart routine....and you don't want that!