TOS Caption Contest #132 - esrevinU rorriM

[Rat Boy]

Scotty: "They soured the milk!"

Scotty: "And I thought it was McCoy who had the uncontrollable diarrhea."

 

[Shatmandu]

Spock: "Mr. Scott, item number one on our list was to fill the tank with water."

 

[cooleddie74]

SCOTTY:"Hold bloody STILL, sir!!!

Ye're not gonna impregnate any more of our yeomans!!! The admirals back at headquarters are askin' too many questions!!!"

 

[cooleddie74]

SCOTTY: "Ye were right, Mr. Spock.

The stuff in that hypo?

GREAT SHIT.

I'm bloody wasted!"

 

[Cakes488]

With McCoy on leave, it fell to Spock and Scotty to put down the pets left at the ship's pound.

The first pet to go was the one that caused the most trouble: Kirk's one eyed snake named Lefty. The poor thing could barely see but he put up the good fight... Scotty got a handle on him and jerked him.... so he soon "came" around.

 

[cooleddie74]

SCOTTY:"Aye, lad...

There's a TON of styrofoam peanuts in this bloody box."

 

[The Squire of Gothos]

Chekov: Guess vat I have under my hand.
Sulu: Yellow button.
Chekov: Ha! Correct. Guess vat I have under my hand now.
Sulu: Your agoniser Mr Chekov.
Chekov: Ha! Wrong, I win... oh.

 

[Cakes488]

Spock and Scotty were making the Laser Floyd show a weekly event and with good reason.......

Scott: Aye ere it is, just where I left it! Me scotch !!

Spock: I'd care to partake in imbibing of your spirits Mr. Scott and in turn I shall be glad to shotgun you from my marijuana smoking receptacle.

 

[Shatmandu]

Scotty: "I dunna mind helping the Captain with his meds, but does it really have t'be injected into his taint?"
Spock: "Just hold up the scrotum, Engineer."

 

[highlander]

Chekov: "Is it wrong that I get a massive boner every time I get tossed in the agonizer?"

 

[Shatmandu]

Chekov: "Next man to stinkpalm me gets an agonizer up the ass."
Sulu: "Deal."

Scotty: "After this thing dies, I'll be making meself a new kilt."

 

[highlander]

Scotty: "Do we have ta kill it Mr. Spock?"
Spock: "Yes Mr. Scott the Captain needs the fur to make a new toupee."

 

[Shatmandu]

Spock: "Mister Scott will remain alive because he never mocked my race. You, on the other hand ... <leans down, injects the person>"
Scotty, whispering through tears: "I'm sorry, Cap'n."

 

[Nerys Myk]

SPOCK: The Moon is full and he still hasn't turned into a werewolf.

SCOTTY: Aye, I might have been mistaken. It could have been a pomeranian that bit him, not a wolf.

 

[Shatmandu]

Scotty: "When are these bleedin 'snipes' supposed to arrive?"
Spock: "Doctor McCoy said any moment now."

 

[Mistral]

Chekov: "What the hell is on my console?"

Sulu: "I dunno-wait, Uhura was sitting there just before you started your shift."

 

[Mistral]

Nimoy and Doohan had a brief stint on Irwin Allen's Land of the Giants just prior to doing Star Trek.

 

[Mistral]

Mr. Scott: "When we're done skinnin' this cat can we go pull the wings off of some flys?"

 

[Gertch]

"Okay Mr Spock, I've got our dick in a box. Hit 'em with the hypo."

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Mr. Spock and Mr. Scott were found of playing Jerk the Kirk.