TOS Caption Contest #104 - This Time, Blue Shirts Die

[Shatmandu]

Spock: "I will not go after you, Mister Boma."

Chekov: "I just found out I'm the only vohn Doctor McCoy makes do de nude jumping jacks during de physicals."

 

[Rat Boy]

Spock: "She claims to represent the Lollipop Guild."

Chekov: "Vhy did I do it? Vhy did I try to shove my thumbs up my nose?"

Sulu: "Moron."

 

[Outpost4]

Koenig: George, I play an ensign, not an idiot! "Vit' his outdated veapon, if he shoots at me, I vill just step out of t' vay." What are they thinking, George?

 

[Gertch]

Chekov: "I just found out I'm the only vohn Doctor McCoy makes do de nude jumping jacks during de physicals."

 

[Triskelion]

Chekov: So when the Keptin kept worrying we were weering into the wrong wector, I gawe him a wanilla wafer and he put it in his west pocket, and said Wasco da Gamma needs a waccination!

Sulu: The Captain said what??

Chekov: Werbatim! He said he had so much wertigo he needed a wacuum bag! He was totally willified!

Sulu: He was villified?

Chekov: No, willified. You know. Captain Kirk.

McCoy: The Ensign for romancin' begs the Doctor's examination.
Boman: The Yeoman with Mr Boman in the red will be bedded.
Scotty: The Birdie in the girdie drives me shuttle up the middle.
Spock: No gentlemen. The Vulcan with his oilcan lubes the lassie's underchassis.
Yeoman: Boys, boys! You can boldly come where everyone's come before!

 

[Shatmandu]

Chekov: "'Breath deeply, Chekov. Blood sample, Chekov. Marrow sample, Chekov. Skeen sample, Chekov.'"
Sulu: "How about a 'Shut the fuck up and navigate this bitch' sample, Chekov?"

Spock: "Boma, you go on foot patrol with Yeoman Loveshead."
Boma: "... I'm torn ..."

 

[Rat Boy]

Guess the quote time:

Chekov: "Not moose; cow."

 

[John Picard]

Checkov: "I do not undestand vy you geegle ewery time I say, "Moose und squarrel".

Sulu: *snicker*

 

[Maurice]

CHEKOV: I theenk somevun slipped somesing in my dreenk last night. Vun of those little pills...

SULU: Roofies. How's your ass?

CHEKOV: Sore. Vhy?

SPOCK: Yes, Mr. Boma, getting on your knees before my awesomeness *is* logical.

 

[Diesel Micky Dolenz]

Chekov: "Give us some blood, Chekov. Pee in this cup, Chekov. Bend over Chekov. Squeal like a pig, Checkov.... Actually that last demand sounded like it was coming from you, Sulu."

Sulu: "You don't say."

Spock: "Technically, gentlemen, it's five on one."

 

[Nerys Myk]

SPOCK: Mister Boma, I do not care if your great great grandfather was President of the United States! I'm still in charge!

 

[cooleddie74]

SPOCK:"You first, Mister Boma."

BOMA:"I'm not defecating into that access hatch with a white woman watching, Spock!!"

SCOTTY:"Beginner."

"Tings just haven't been de same since Mike, Peter and Mickey left de ship to do dere own solo missions."

 

[cooleddie74]

"Are one of you guys gonna drop your trousers and do me or NOT?

My knees are getting blisters."

 

[highlander]

Sulu: "Hey Pavel, what's got two thumbs and wants to come back to my quarters for some hot boy on boy action?"

 

[highlander]

Mr Boma felt the peer pressure to give in, but midget blow jobs were just wrong in his book.

 

[cooleddie74]

SPOCK:"What are you balking for, Mister Boma?

The good Yeoman DID say she would snowball for us."

"Here's de Orthodox church...here's de steeple...open de pneumatic doors...here's de people!"

 

[Rat Boy]

Spock: "Indeed, Lieutenant, this is where all the white women are at."

 

[cooleddie74]

SPOCK:"What the Yeoman is incapable of swallowing, she will spit into the access hatch to lubricate the fuel lines for takeoff."

 

[ManOnTheWave]

``Here is the church, and here is the steep ... the steeple. Here is the ... the steeple ... how does anyone do this, anyway?''

Sulu: I have no idea.

 

[Nerys Myk]

SCOTTY: Would ya be needing the gloves?