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Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #518: Minor Malfunctions

Which episode should be featured in the next Caption Contest?

  • Gambit

    Votes: 1 8.3%
  • Phantasms

    Votes: 3 25.0%
  • The Pegasus

    Votes: 4 33.3%
  • Genesis

    Votes: 4 33.3%
  • Emergence

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Preemptive Strike

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    12
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Riker: Mister Worf, try removing the denim filter.

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Riker: With this fog, we're going to have to rely on you and your VISOR, Geordi.
LaForge: Talk about the blind leading the blind.

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Captain's Log: We have encountered the Dog Aliens. In order to show no hostile intentions, we're not looking them in the eye.

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Wesley: Ha! Missed me!

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Worf: We can't shift it. Wait, are you pushing? I'm pulling!
 
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Picard: Which one of you opened the sun roof again?

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After being ordered to repair the ship, Wesley contemplates taddling to his mom about Riker putting him in dangerous situations

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Worf: Ewww, yuck, some of his bowels are coming out of the wound.

Romulan: Aww man... Why'd you tell me that? I can never unsee that right there

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Frakes: Has Paramount or CBS tried remastering it yet?


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Data: I believe we inadvertently have walked into a toxic gas cloud commander?

Geordi: It's understandable though. Data is unaffected by it. My VISOR didn't pick it up... & you've been sleep walking for almost an hour.................. Commander?
 
TFTW LH!


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Picard: Hmm, only me and Data out of the regulars on duty... This won't be important then. Nothing ever happens when non-speaking extras are doing most of the jobs.


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Finally Prime Minister May unveiled what a Red White and Blue Brexit actually looks like.


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Security Officer's Personal Log: All this effort to try and get the emails, and the targ's son then goes and just tweets them after we get back!


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Wesley: It's a message from DS9 and Voyager, begging us to help them get remastered in HD in the same way we were.

Picard: Sucks to be them.


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Riker: No wonder they have problems, this is the worst operation I've ever seen! No helmets, pick axes, little carts on tracks... How are they ever going to get any coal or diamonds out of here?

Data: MINOR malfunctions Sir.
 
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Wesley: "Riker, get Worf outside to fix the antenna. You know how hard it is to get FOX on clearly and 'In Living Color' is starting and I don't want to miss it."

Picard: "Normally I'd tell you to shut up except it's my favorite show, too. Don't tell Riker."

Riker: "Captain, um, I'm standing right here. Mr. Worf, do what the boy said."

Wesley: "Worf would have obeyed me if I was an adult."

Everybody: "SHUT UP WESLEY!!"

(BTW: You win the internet, yours was a nice use of denim to simulate signal distortion!)

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Riker: "Geordi, where did this fog come fr--"

Data (interrupting): "I am sorry sir, Geordi gave me what is known as 'Jaegerbomb' for breakfast and my synthetic intestines are producing a typical humanoid reaction."


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Picard: "Why did the lights go out?"
Helm: "What lights?"
Picard: "The four lights in the ceiling."
Data: "How many starfleet officers does it take to replace light bulbs?"
Security dude standing in for Worf: "Well how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie-- never mind."

TNGCaption339b.jpg


Wesley: "The Captain is not going to want to hear about this."
(invading party of Romulans appear)
Lead Romulan: "Too late Wesley, Picard told me to tell you to shut up before I told him I am your father’s brother’s nephew’s cousin’s former roommate."
Wesley: "So what does that make me?"
Romulan (stammering): "Beetlejuice. Just Shut up Wesley and don't say it three times."

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Worf: "That was a silent Jaegerbomb. Hope nobody notices."
(Six Romulans on the bridge promptly collapse and fall *thud* onto the floor)

(( note to self: Hope people have seen this running "gag" over from the TOS caption page... ))
 
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WES: I should tell someone about this. Though every time I try to say something they say " Shut up Wesley!". Screw it. They're on their own. I'm out of here!
 
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Captain's Log: So far, Barclay hasn't got on that we've been faking subspace interference. I'm putting a block to Kathryn Janeway and whoever her crew is so they won't be able to read this and have no idea how annoying hie is.
 
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Picard: I see they're still using the old crotchcam technology.
Riker: Mister Worf, get your shorty-shorts.
 
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Geordi: Actin' funny, but I don't know why. Excuse me while I kiss this guy.
 
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