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TNG Caption This! #448: Conflicts

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Data: Go away kid, ya bother me.


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Wesley: Why were you kissing and grinding against one of the ship's bulkheads?

Data: I like big women.
 
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Marina: "Roddenberry's idea for a "film noir" episode is stupid.
Patrick: "You dames are cute when mad.
.
 
TFTW

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Picard: Heeeee is an Englishman

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Data: Do you expect me to talk?

Crusher: No, Mr. Data, I expect you to die.

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Data: Which one should we kill?

Picard: We'll let O'Brien choose.

Keiko: Oh shit!


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Wesley: So you don't have one? Then what do you play with under the desk all day?

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Troi: I'm sick of sensing shit. I wanna tricorder like this one.

Picard: That's a phaser.

Troi: See, I'm useless without a tricorder.
 
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Troi: I'm warning you, I know how to use this."
Picard: "You're holding it up-side down."
.
 
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Riker: Make sure you destroy every memory chip that's got his cat poetry.


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[buzzer sound. Data's nose lights up.]

Crusher, passing Riker the laser scalpel: Your turn Will.

[Riker picks up a card]

Riker, reading card: Remove wrenched back.
 
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Riker: Not only did you void the warranty - you bricked him!
Crusher: Sure, he's not running on Android and I'm the asshole.
 
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Picard: No Number One! only Doctor Crusher is allowed to join me for croissant.


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Riker: Are you qualified to do that?

Crusher: More than I am to operate on people if I'm being honest.


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Picard: Are we boring you Keiko?

Keiko: Well... yes.


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Data: So having checked all Star Fleet regulations, it turns out there's no such rank as "Acting Ensign".


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Leadhead Troi: Oh, the last picture was too dark for you last week was it? Well is this better? IS IT???!!!!!!!!!!????
 
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Picard: Writing a holonovel about Beverly telling me that Wesley was my son, and beaming me into the holodeck while I was asleep....I'm not amused.

Riker: What do you mean? It was the real Beverly as well
 
^ Nah....
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Picard: There are FOUR pips!

Les Landau: CUT! I hate that!. Let's redo the entire two parter. Instead of four pips. Too lame. Let's go with...*sees the lights of the soundstage* four lights! Let's take a break and come back at 1900 hours and redo the scenes where Patrick said four pips...
 
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PICARD: For the last time, stop checking your hair in my head!

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BEVERLY: That's it. I finally deleted the U2 album.
DATA: Now I truly understand pain.

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ALIEN POSSESSING DATA: If he mentions honor one more time, I will shoot him.

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WESLEY: Data, why don't people like it when I'm smarter than the grownups?
DATA: While this is an area of humanity I do not completely understand, it kind of pisses me off too.

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TROI: I am too an empath! You're feeling anger! See!
PICARD: Yes. That's obvious from my body language. Everybody can tell I'm angry.
TROI: But I sensed it! Shut up!
 
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Troi: Take your pants off!
Picard: Ohh?
Troi: And put on this "unisex" skant.
Picard: Aww.


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Troi: Got any emergency lights?
Picard: There are -
Troi: SAY IT AND I'LL BLOW YOUR HEAD OFF!
Picard: There are, erm, some back in spacedock along with our cargo containers of security cameras, seatbelts and oxygen masks.
Troi: You are such a galactic cheapskate. <walks off>
Picard <muttering>: Too bad I couldn't tell you about the four emergency lights I keep for just such an occasion.
 
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