This girl confuses me......
- Thread starter BoyNamedSue
- Start date
I think that when that happens, there often is an attraction, just one that isn't being acted on for whatever reason. I don't think you should hold your breath waiting for her to come around, though. She's decided you're a friend. If you like being her friend, fine, but it sounds like you want more and I think that will end up with you hurt. So, back to my original advice -- run away. Or walk away, if you like the less dramatic approach.
Obviously we don't know all the details but on the surface it doesn't seem that confusing. She likes you as a friendly type of person but she's not attracted to you. You're just friends. But, from the sounds of it, she's probably doing you a favor. If she kicks most guys to the curb quickly, that would be you in short order.
As for the "mysterious" reason why women have guy friends that they're not attracted to, not really a mystery. They're often just not physically attracted to them. There's just not that chemistry. There might not be anything wrong with the guy, just a lack of that chemistry. I think that part is pretty easy to figure out.
Mr Awe
As for the "mysterious" reason why women have guy friends that they're not attracted to, not really a mystery. They're often just not physically attracted to them. There's just not that chemistry. There might not be anything wrong with the guy, just a lack of that chemistry. I think that part is pretty easy to figure out.
Mr Awe
Do you have access to Rohypnol? If not, cut her loose.
Ahhh, the dreaded "friend zone". My buddy and I in college talked at length about this subject. We had it boiled down to two archetypes: Luke, and Han. It can be quite a quandry. You see that the "Hans" are getting the dates, but you're a Luke. You might try to overcome that by purposely being a dick, but that fails also.
I think its important to maybe stop focusing on the girl, and focus on you. Some part of you is purposely going for someone who's not interested. Why is that? You don't want this pattern to repeat.
The Luke and Han archetypes are within us all. We're not just one or the other. (Cue Yoda voice). Combine them, you must. Know thyself. Love thyself. Know what you want and why. Then go forth.
You have them inverted. You have Luke on the outside, Han trapped within. Worry not about those "assholes" getting the dates. Find your Han. (No this is not a Madbaggins thread) Embrace him. Have hot buttsex with him in a van. Then, and only then, will you have the Han without, the Luke within, until there is no Han, no Luke. There is only you.
And on a more serious note ~ do be sure you are centered and happy with yourself, and loving yourself, because a lack thereof may well repeatedly hurl you into TFZ.
I think its important to maybe stop focusing on the girl, and focus on you. Some part of you is purposely going for someone who's not interested. Why is that? You don't want this pattern to repeat.
The Luke and Han archetypes are within us all. We're not just one or the other. (Cue Yoda voice). Combine them, you must. Know thyself. Love thyself. Know what you want and why. Then go forth.
You have them inverted. You have Luke on the outside, Han trapped within. Worry not about those "assholes" getting the dates. Find your Han. (No this is not a Madbaggins thread) Embrace him. Have hot buttsex with him in a van. Then, and only then, will you have the Han without, the Luke within, until there is no Han, no Luke. There is only you.
And on a more serious note ~ do be sure you are centered and happy with yourself, and loving yourself, because a lack thereof may well repeatedly hurl you into TFZ.
Well he already asked her out and she said no so as long as he does not have a problem with it being in the friend zone is okay. I have a few friends who I thought at first might be relationships material but either they weren't or were currently dating and we ended up being friends.
If I were you I'd start looking for more people on the website. Time to move on, mate.
All that said, I still can't shake the feeling that there's something off with this girl...
If I were you I'd start looking for more people on the website. Time to move on, mate.
All that said, I still can't shake the feeling that there's something off with this girl...
This post could be a little less raunchy, but it contains much truth.
OP, I don't really know your situation, and I know these things can be confusing. Our generation practically wrote the book on confusing guy/girl relationships. But I can't tell you how good it feels to be entirely up front with your intentions and to have her reciprocate. It's so honest and open and it feels great.
This girl that you're all confused about? I'm sure she's very nice and all, but she just isn't for you. There are a lot of girls who are way in to the country thing. Heck, I'm dating one of them. Take a girl to a honkeytonk and try to do a line dance and she'll be all over you. Anyway, just keep in mind that there are plenty of wonderful young women out there who will be perfectly happy to accept a date, let you pay for everything, and have a totally wonderful time with you. Go for those kind of girls and you'll forget all about this mixed-up girl you're so worried about.
This girl that you're all confused about? I'm sure she's very nice and all, but she just isn't for you. There are a lot of girls who are way in to the country thing. Heck, I'm dating one of them. Take a girl to a honkeytonk and try to do a line dance and she'll be all over you. Anyway, just keep in mind that there are plenty of wonderful young women out there who will be perfectly happy to accept a date, let you pay for everything, and have a totally wonderful time with you. Go for those kind of girls and you'll forget all about this mixed-up girl you're so worried about.
You're in the friend zone. There's no coming back from that. She likes the attention you give her, but doesn't want anything more.
Everything is better with MadBaggins' buttsex.
I think you're right on the money. I was in a similar situation at one point in high school. There was a girl I liked and in the beginning she seemed to feel the same. We went out a few times but it soon turned into a friend-type situation yet she was still leading me on. I could see she was playing games so I stopped talking to her. I moved on and started dating someone else. Several months later, during summer break, I ran into her and embarrassingly enough I had a huge hickey on my neck. I talked to her for a few minutes and she made it a point to ask me about my girlfriend.
Well, wouldn't you know it, she started calling me again after that. I talked to her once and started screening her calls after that. So what I took from my whole experience is that some girls (and guys too I'm sure) will take advantage of you if you are too available. Some use mind-games to boost their ego at other's expense.
My advice to the OP is if you really want the girl to be interested in you don't be so readily available to her and move on and start seeing other people. She may get jealous, you never can tell. However, if it were me, I wouldn't have anything else to do with her. It seems like you are being used.
I dunno, man. This clever analogy implies that only Hans are worthy of getting dates. Doesn't Luke have anything on Han, in his own way?
So to sum up the situation:
You ain't get'n in her pants. Period!
You can either
A) Still hang out, text, talk, whatever... if you value her as a friend; You do this knowing full well it's just you and your hand at the end of the night.
B) Walk away;
My advice would be to suck it up and keep her as a friend. Here's why. First it never hurts to have friends, unless the relationship is destructive. Second she's hot. She probably has hot friends. Once she considers you "inside the circle of trust", she'll start inviting you to go to clubs and such. A straight guy that has hot female friends, for whatever reason, seems to be a "turn-on" to other women.
Just go with it bro.
You ain't get'n in her pants. Period!
You can either
A) Still hang out, text, talk, whatever... if you value her as a friend; You do this knowing full well it's just you and your hand at the end of the night.
B) Walk away;
My advice would be to suck it up and keep her as a friend. Here's why. First it never hurts to have friends, unless the relationship is destructive. Second she's hot. She probably has hot friends. Once she considers you "inside the circle of trust", she'll start inviting you to go to clubs and such. A straight guy that has hot female friends, for whatever reason, seems to be a "turn-on" to other women.
Just go with it bro.
It also doesn't hurt to have a good looking "wing woman" to go out with. It can be a powerful tool to assist you in your endeavors.
No no no, girls don't know what they want. Some girls, maybe many do this stuff all the time. You are just a pillow for her to cry on. To be honest you are allowing this to happen to yourself too. I think you should cut contact with her because nothing is going to happen between you two and she's just going to use you. Find a nice girl who will treat you right, respect you and respect herself.
Actually ignoring her might make her attracted to you because then she'll see you are somebody who has a life besides her. But really, don't waste time with this broad.
I just get so fed up with guys their frat-boy off-hand statements about "crazy chicks," as if a woman on antidepressants is going to start stalking and murdering pets. This is ridiculous. What's more, it's a double standard; these comments are never directed towards men.
Besides, like I said before, anyone who doesn't have issues is either lying or boring. Anyone without baggage hasn't lived.
Very cool of you to say so.
You have to make her jealous, not talk to her as a friend. That is the way to win her if you want her. For instance, invite another girl while you´re on Yahoo. And give the new girl all the attention. You´re probably too available. What´s free has no value.
If you don´t wanna do something like that forget her.
If you don´t wanna do something like that forget her.
Similar threads
