Tell your best clean Star Trek joke

[Laura Cynthia Chambers]

Slightly OT, but with a joke: we think we heard Avery Brooks narrating the Bible on a radio show that was playing a recorded dramatic reading of the Bible.

It was the book of Daniel - he can't stay away from prophets.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

To view this content we will need your consent to set third party cookies.
For more detailed information, see our cookies page.

Accept third party cookies

 

[Kevin Thomas Riley]

I can't take credit for any of these, but I had them saved on my harddrive:

Q: Why did the Klingon cross the road?
A: To conquer the other side.

Q: Do you know what they call a Klingon with half a brain?
A: Gifted!

Q: What is the longest four years of a Klingon's life?
A: Third Grade.

Q: How do you get a one-armed Klingon out of a tree?
A: Wave to him.

Q: How many Klingons does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: NONE: Klingons aren't afraid of the dark.

 

[alensatemybuick1]

The light bulb jokes reminded me of this one I read many years ago in "The Final Reflection" by John M. Ford:

Q: How many Romulans does it take to change a transtator?

A: One to change the 'stator and 150 to blow up the ship out of shame..

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

How many Pakleds does it take to change a light bulb?

One. He looks for things, to make us bright.

 

[VulcanMindBlown]

GEORDIE La Forge:

"Alreet! I can get Warp Factor 9 for yas like! Why aye man!"

Where was the punchline?

I can't take credit for any of these, but I had them saved on my harddrive:

Q: What is the longest four years of a Klingon's life?
A: Third Grade.

Q: How do you get a one-armed Klingon out of a tree?
A: Wave to him.

1. I am assuming that the first one was a rank structure joke.
2. For the second joke, I am guessing that you are saying that he would lose balance and fall by waving in a tree.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Where was the punchline?

Once you know what a Geordie is, you'll understand.

 

[retroenzo]

How do you wipe out the entire crew of a Klingon Bird-of-Prey?

Knock on the airlock.

 

[B.J.]

 

[Vorpal_Blade]

Q: what powers the Enterprise?
A: Spock-plugs!
LOL! I'll laugh at my own joke.

 

[DrCorby]

Once you know what a Geordie is, you'll understand.

I only got it because I've been watching reruns of Inspector Lewis...

 

[Velocity]

What does a Romulan frog use for camouflage? A croaking device.

 

[tharpdevenport]

In today's news: the stardrive section and saucer announced a divorce. Citing that if they stayed together it would be explosive, the two have already seperated and gone their seperate ways.

 

[Laura Cynthia Chambers]

Q:Where do Enterprise-D crew members sun themselves?
A:Tan Forward.

(We really need a badum-CHING! emoji...)

 

[Nyotarules]

1. Question - What did T'Pau say when T'Pring and Spock showed up late for their wedding?
Answer - 'Well it was Amok time Thee showed up'....

2. Question - Why doesn't Odo play poker?
Answer - Because he might lose an arm and a leg

3. Question - Why do Klingons smell in the daytime?
Answer - Because they like to bat' leth

 

[B.J.]

(We really need a badum-CHING! emoji...)

 

[Laura Cynthia Chambers]

Right now, I just do this:

 

[tharpdevenport]

Q: What did the man think of his new helmet-wearing neighbor's lush lawn?

A: The grass is always Breener on the other side.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Q: What does Senator Vreenak like to eat for dessert?

A: Just a CAAAAAAAAAAAKE!

 

[The Old Mixer]

(We really need a badum-CHING! emoji...)

I use this:

To view this content we will need your consent to set third party cookies.
For more detailed information, see our cookies page.

Accept third party cookies