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Movie Caption Contest #113: Schooled

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Saavik: "I don't know which I hate worse: his toupe or his bell bottoms."
 
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Pine (thinking): "I gotta say, I'm lovin' this role so far! I think I've really got that 'Shatner touch' down pat. It feels like the glory days of TOS are happening all over again! Why, John Cho is even going around telling anyone who will listen what an asshole I am."
 
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A face that everyone, including his own mother, wants to punch.


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Shatner: This set would be more convincing if it was finished.


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Kirk: Mr. Saavik, are you part Timelord?

Saavik: No, Admiral. Why do you ask?

Kirk: Because in the next two movies you look like a completely different person.
 
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Random Admiral: So we are to believe that above all others who have worked hard all these years Captain Pike selected YOU to be in command. And then after you where stranded on a ice moon you managed to get back to the ship where you proceeded to outsmart a VULCAN in order to regain command where you then saved the galaxy?!?

Kirk: ... Yes ... I am THAT good :D


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Thanks to her Vulcan disciplines Savik was the only one of the crew not to be distracted by the captains impromtu performance of Rocket Man
 
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Huh... that green chick's got an adam's apple.


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Kirk: What the hell, we already know what the Klingons look like. Ladies and gentlemen, the shortcut to the latrine is now open.
Uhura: I've been waiting fifteen years for this.
Saavik: Are all these toilet cams necessary?
 
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Young Kirk (thinking): Shit, I hope that years down the line I don't have to do what this Vulcan prick's doing to me.


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Older Kirk (thinking): Fuck. All those years ago, I jinxed myself. Now I gotta do to this Vulcan broad what that Vulcan prick--um, Spock--did to me.
 
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Shatner: "Sorry I'm late, everyone. Hope you guys didn't get too bored waiting. Um...what's Kirstie staring at on the screen over there?"

Nichols: "She's been watching old 'Cheers' episodes all morning."

Alley (thinking): "I could so blow Shelley Long off the screen!"
 
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KIRK:"Your daddy didn't let you play with your logic blocks when you were a baby...did he?"

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KIRK:"Alright...simulation's over!

The REAL test begins! Everyone...get naked!"
 
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"So...Captain Pike DOESN'T make beeping sounds to communicate?

Then why the hell did you tell me...

Oh, screw it. Never MIND."
 
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"Why did it have to be red... I hate red..."

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Saavik: "No Admiral... *sigh* I don't want a little Admiral in me..."
 

Kirk: "I really should pay attention, this is my court-martial, fer Christ's sake, but I dunno, maybe afterwards Bones and I can grab a beer and-Focus! Stay focused! Damn, what were the charges again? With this stupid look on my face they probably think I'm being arrogant but I haven't really been listening and I'm not sure how to react. Mom always said to pay more attention, I really should have listened."
 
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KIRK: (thinkng) If I get my ass kicked one more time, I'll have beaten Archer's record! And I haven't even graduated!!!!!
 
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"What the eyes? Oh this guy outside just appeared, said his name was Lucifer and that I was his vessel. I just said 'sure pal', expecting it to be another Chekov joke, but next thing I know I got these"
"More black eyes?"
"SHUT UP!"
 
Crossover
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KIRK: (whispering) Like I said, I got a line on a prime Vulcan brain for your controller. Show some patience.
 
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The crew (except Saavik) rushes to their positions for the daily nude jumping jacks routine, whilst Kirk decides to supervise.
 
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Pike: "As part of your final exam, we will be beamed down to a hostile world."

Spock: "Captain Pike will be wearing gold."

Pike: "Mister Spock will be wearing blue."

Spock: "The rest of you will be wearing cadet red."

Kirk: "Ah man, why are you talking to me?"."
 
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