Movie Caption Contest #104: Buddy Movies
- Thread starter Rat Boy
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Kirk: Damn. Now I'll have to snuggle up with Bones on those cold winter nights.
Data: Give this to Grignak and tell him I love him.
Where will you be when your diarrhea comes back?
"Dammit, Spock!!!
Fine time to fall asleep...I need to GET IN THERE AND DROP A DEUCE, man!!!"
"Here, sir.
I found it in a box of Reman Cracker Jack. You blow into it and it makes a comical whistling noise...then a guard shoots you."
Data: "You take it, Captain."
Picard, shaking head: "Data, I ..."
Data: "Fine. <sticks it to own chest> Holla! <beams away, waving>"
Data: "Tell Deanna I appreciated her letting me run through my Perv Database on her ... <slaps tech to Picard's chest, he beams away>"
"Here, sir...in case I do not return to the Enterprise.
It is a positronic memory chip containing details of my entire life and career...including the time I Dirty Sanchezed Tasha."
"It's an emergency transporter sir, it allows a single person to escape"
"Did you bring two?"
"I knew you'd say that you french-english prick. Enjoy your 'procedure'"
*slaps on own chest, beams away*
"Take this, sir.
It's a wireless uplink to Commander Riker and Counselor Troi's wedding night sex footage."
SPOCK: "Still looking into your future, Jim?"
KIRK: "Yep."
SPOCK: "Does it look any more appealing yet?"
KIRK: "Can't say that it does... hey, what the..? Crushed by a bridge?! Are you fuckin' kidding me?!"
KIRK: "No... he was the greatest friend I ever had. Well, he'll get a traditional Vulcan funeral -- that's what he would've wanted. I'll take him back to Vulcan... even though it is in the wrong direction from where we're headed. And then I'll carry his body up the steps to Mount Seleya... all the way up... by myself. Then I'll have to stay for the week-long mourning period... And damn, it's gonna be awkward explaining how this happened to his parents... Aw, the hell with it, I'll just shoot him out a torpedo tube."
DATA (displaying a Federation credit chip): “What is the most you ever lost on a credit toss?”
PICARD: “Data?”
DATA: “The most. You ever lost. On a credit toss.”
PICARD: “I don't know. I couldn't say.”
(Data flips the credit chip and covers it with his hand.)
DATA: “Call it.”
PICARD: “Call it?”
DATA: “Yes.”
PICARD: “For what?”
DATA: “Just call it.”
PICARD: “Well, we need to know what we're calling it for here.”
DATA: “You need to call it. I cannot call it for you. It would not be fair.”
PICARD: “I haven’t put anything up.”
DATA: “Yes, you did. You have been putting it up your whole life, you just did not know it. You know what stardate is on this credit chip?”
PICARD: “No.”
DATA: “34793.2. It has been traveling twenty-two years to get here. And now it is here. And it is either heads or tails. And you have to say. Call it.”
PICARD: “Look, I need to know what I stand to win.”
DATA: “Everything.”
PICARD: “How's that?”
DATA: “You stand to win everything. Call it.”
(A slight pause.)
PICARD: “Mr. Data, has your programming been affected by the holodeck again?”
Spock: "Betcha I can hold my breath for longer on the other side of that glass"
Kirk: "You're on"
Kirk: "OK you win............. Spock?"
Over Intercom: And ayeeeeeeeeee will always love youuuuuu! I will always love youuuuuuu!
Kirk: Never let go, Jack. Never let go.
Spock: Since Nero has altered the course of our lives, I doubt I will die in a warp reactor accident as predicted by my older counterpart.
Kirk: Still happened. Should've listened to his older shelf.
"I've always known I'll die with a bald Frenchman from the future on a shitty backwater planet by a guy with a bad Sting haircut. So we should be good."
"That guy over there... he looks a bit like you"
"I do not see the resemblance-"
"Do you have a brother, or maybe a half-brother?"
"No"
"You sure? Maybe you went via Star Fleet while he went all religious and tried to find God-"
"SHUT UP"
He was going to tell me the secret of Bigfoot and the Loch Ness monster. Now the world will never know!
I'm telling you sir. Just drop this into Dr Crusher's aperitif and she'll be all over you like a Ferengi on a gold-plated donut.
It's a bit large...won't she notice it?
She didn't notice a hole in a warp bubble universe, a trill with a bulging gut, a shot crewman on the holodeck, or her son being a flaming liberal dropout. Why would she care about what she puts in her mouth?
Good point. Let's have it.
Excuse me Mr Nero, would you be willing to buy a magazine subscription to help the Vulcans Without Lips Foundation?
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