I really need to change
- Thread starter Trekker4747
- Start date
Actually, that's a good suggestion, too.
Trekker: Even though I don't know you very well, I do consider you an awesome poster on this board! What I like about you is that you're witty, smart, and intelligent and you don't seem to give a damn about what others think of your opinions about Trek and other things. Why would you worry about what others think of you now? I'm sorry you're going through a lot of stress..so have I. I've been doing lots of things for other people these past few weeks and have done little just for myself, like to go shopping or anything cause at the moment $ is tight for me just to do that. So I do know and understand how things can get in real life.
I also sometimes need this place as well as starscapebbs to vent. Even though I hate doing that, when I do do it I feel less threatened and much better about things cause I know I'm not the only one that has been going through some nasty shit these past few weeks. I also start to feel guilty cause there are others who are going through even worse things than I am going through and it makes my stress level lower a bit.
I wouldn't worry about it though. The only thing I would worry about is if you got a warning on TBBS and got banned for a while..THEN I'd worry!
I also sometimes need this place as well as starscapebbs to vent. Even though I hate doing that, when I do do it I feel less threatened and much better about things cause I know I'm not the only one that has been going through some nasty shit these past few weeks. I also start to feel guilty cause there are others who are going through even worse things than I am going through and it makes my stress level lower a bit.
I wouldn't worry about it though. The only thing I would worry about is if you got a warning on TBBS and got banned for a while..THEN I'd worry!
If you think the problem is that people perceive you as whiny, wouldn't a thread like this be counter-intuitive? It seems the solution is simple. Just relax and post for fun. Don't worry about what other people think. But, at the same time, if you start a thread, think about what kind of discussion will follow. Think if it could evolve into a big discussion or is it limited to comments on whatever observation was in your original post.
A
Amaris
Guest
Another problem I run into is because of the way I talk. I express my ideas differently and people sometimes don't "get it" and think I am trying to be an asshole about it and that is what frustrates me. I'm a very friendly person, easy to talk to, easy to make friends with yet people can still have a perception of me that is 100% untrue.
It would blow some people away how friendly and down to earth I am. I don't have a big head or sit on a high horse. I am just brutally honest and some people can't handle it and take it as something else. It's irritating when people pass a judgement on someone and it isn't fair that it happens. I have a lot of friends who thought differently about me when they first met me but they now "get me" and ended up really liking the way I am because they understand it. If someone doesn't understand it, they will take it all the wrong way.
It happens to the BEST of us. 
It is unfortunate that people are misunderstood; perhaps they're giving off the wrong cues, verbal or otherwise. Don't let strangers' negative opinions bother you. Those who really matter don't mind, and those who mind never matter anyway.
It is unfortunate that people are misunderstood; perhaps they're giving off the wrong cues, verbal or otherwise. Don't let strangers' negative opinions bother you. Those who really matter don't mind, and those who mind never matter anyway.
I always think of Trekker as the Misc mascot. You laugh with him, you laugh at him, maybe toss a couple of tomatoes at him, but in the end it wouldn't be the same without him and you wouldn't want to miss him.
Yes. Sometimes I wonder if he and Jayson are related ...
I've only been on this board for just over a year and i have to agree with this it wouldnt quite be the same here with out Trekker or jayson.
they certainly make for some of the more wierder threads.
Well there's two reasons for this
Gentlemen-- and I use the term sarcastically-- your restraining order has arrived. No more comments like this. Thank you.
This much is true. Misc is not a Lounge or a Blog.And see, people have ranted at me to get a blog.Like Misc is some hallowed ground of great discussion.
And see, people have ranted at me to get a blog.
I know I do it a lot, but what can I say, I'm a tense person with a need to vent.
I've seen more than one instance of people telling you off for "venting" about some incident in your life and then starting a new thread where they... wait for it... vent about some incident in their lives.
The best arguments ones usually come from people who complain that they "can't find" some other thread because your thread is directly responsible for another being pushed down to page 2.
As far as I am concerned, you should be able to post whatever you want as long as you keep within the rules as you normally do.
And see, people have ranted at me to get a blog.
It's not, but I don't think setting our expectations slightly above ingrown taint hair and vomiting/pissing in the shower topics is terribly unreasonable.
Ok, since no one wants to say it, Tough Love time:
Trekker, i agree with you, you DO need to change. Your posting habits aren't really the big problem, though, just a symptom of it. We can talk about your many whine or rant threads, but it's really not the issue.
Really, you just seem generally unhappy. You don't seem to be going anywhere or doing anything, and are just in a huge rut. Biggest problem with all this is that things aren't really THAT bad. If things were going badly, it would force you to change. Right now, though, you seem "comfortable" with the situation, but you don't like it. Don't seem to like the job, but it pays you enough to get by, so no motivation there. Don't like where you live (or your neighbors), but moving is hard, and it's decent enough. Besides, where would you move to? Want a different career, but you're already employed at this one without risking anything for education or startup cost, so no motivation there. Sick of being alone, but never able to man up enough to talk to the many girls you crush on, instead just thinking back over a failed relationship from a decade ago, and erasing the bad parts until all you see was an idealized version of the relationship, when in actuality, it wasn't a very long relationship, and she cheated on you.
You say you want to change things up, but as things aren't quite bad enough for you, you stay in the comfortable mediocrity you've got going on. Positive change has been replaced by anti-depressants, when finding something to be excited about would be a bigger improvment.
As a result of all of this, you've become the 70 year old guy on the bench (or its virtual equivalent) bitching about the weather, bad drivers, and the damned kids and their rap music next door.
Honestly, you are starting to remind me very much of a guy I used to work with, back in high school, when i worked in a family-run grocery store. The guy worked there when HE was in high school, and then got drafted into Vietnam. Afterwards, he came back home for a while, and took his old job back while he figured out what he wanted to do. 45 years later, he still works there. Was married briefly, and had a kid, but is long divorced now. Lives alone, pretty much hates his job and his whole situation, but is trapped at this point. Nice guy, smart as hell, just settled for a little too long, and got stuck...
So yeah, it's not really your posting style that's the problem (IMO), but your life in general at the moment. You seem bored, depressed, and stuck in a rut, which leads to all these threads just complaining about inconsequential things, and general apathy.
Sorry for being blunt, but hopefully I'm not too far off base, and it helps with some re-evaluating. Don't let this be another thread where you talk about wanting to do something, and then chicken out, deciding to play it safe; figure out what you really want and DO IT. You're smart enough, not nearly as bad looking as you seem to think, and young enough to still make a change, if you really want it.
I agree to some level, but change is not always easy (or possible) for some people. I'm a creature of comfort, but I definitely don't see myself stuck in a rut. Sure, things could be a lot better in life, such as $1 million in my bank account or a nice mansion with an oceanview. BUT what matters is how you look at things ... Remember the serenity prayer (even if you're not religious or a Christian).
^only point I was trying to make was that he doesn't really seem all that happy with where things are at the moment, but they aren't quite bad enough to motivate him to change them, so we just see the unhappy complaining here, and it spills over into his interactions with others, making things worse, and reinforcing their image of him
Being unhappy and complaining are not necessarily one and the same. There are people who lead miserable lives, but you don't hear them complaining. There are also people who just want to "vent" occasionally (I'm one of those), but that's not to say they're unhappy with their lives.
Seeing as how most of the complaints (over several years) have been about how he's unhappy, I guess I don't see the connection you're trying to make. Then again, "unhappy" isn't quite right, but maybe "bored" is closer? Like I said, 'comfortable' enough to not force a change, but not happy, either...
Similar threads
