Facts About Captain Robau

Robau gets women pregnant by coming within 2 parsecs of them.

 

If Robau fell in the forest, and no one was watching, it would sound like Beethoven's Ninth. If he fell in the forest, and someone was watching, he would beat that guy to a bloody pulp. But the screams of agony would still sound like Beethoven's Ninth.

 

If Robau fell in the forest, he would grow back even stronger.

 

When Robau was a little boy, his father told him he was going to get a spanking for bad behavior. Just before he spanked him, his Dad said, "Son, this is going to hurt me alot more than it hurts you." Robau's Dad was right.

 

Robau once killed a man in his underwear. Never wear Robau's underwear.

 

Robau hates playing 'Rock Paper Scissors' because he doesn't believe anything could beat rock. He always chooses rock, and when someone throws paper, he says,"I win." If someone is foolish enough to dispute this, he takes his clenched fist and punches them in the face, then says, "I thought your paper would protect you."

 

"It isn't wise to upset Robau"

"But Sir, no-one worries about upsetting us Trek BBS posters"

"That's because Trek BBS posters don't rip people's arms out of their sockets if they lose. Robau is known to do that."

 

He's also known to hunt down and inflict inhuman amount of pain to posters that just ripoff facts from Star Wars, as if we wouldn't notice.

 

I wouldn't want Robau hunting me. He looks strong enough to pull the ears off a Gundark.

 

When Robau alters the deal, you pray he doesn't alter it any further.

 

Do not be alerted to Robau's presence. He will deal with you himself.

 

When Robau says he feels like he could take on the whole Empire by himself today, he's not using hyperbole.

 

Robau would also be delighted if we would join him.

 

Do not underestimate the power of Robau. Consume you, he will.

 

Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to ROBAU!

 

If Robau did what Jim did in American Pie, he'd get the pie pregnant.

 

The term CILF was coined in reference to Robau.

 

Robau invented the moonwalk without even noticing he'd done it.

 

if you can somehow manage to cut the head off of Robau, two Robaus will grow back...yet another mreason why nobody tries the hurt Robau

 

So this is what they were referring to, in Highlander's "There can be only one!"