Caption Contest 20: @#$%&* Coworkers!

[Triskelion]

Well give the guy a break from getting all his buttons pushed. This week's contest went two weeks, I blame the holidays. Hope everyone had a great holiday season and will have a great new year! So getting right to it, here are:

The First Image:
A tie:

Archer: "Captain to the bridge. What is going on? ... Bridge? ... T'Pol? ... Anyone? ... Someone answer me...."

T'Pol tells Merriweather: "It is your turn to go remind the captain to release the button so he can hear us reply."

"Etch-a-Sketch 1 calling Etch-a-Sketch 2.

Send me an image of square boobies. Over."

The Second Image:

ARCHER: No keyboard. No mouse. Not even a touch screen. Henry Starling was an idiot!!!!

The Third Image:

On a ship like Enterprise in the 22nd Century, where planets are few and far between, C Deck Section 5 was the only place to unburden one's self, hence its nickname: "the Fart Corner."

Photoshop Award/ Multicap Award:
The same entry won both categories in what was not an easy competition!Nice going, jongredic!

Archer: Archer to T'Pol... I've got a bit of a problem here.
T'Pol: I'm busy.

Archer: AHA! Found it... stop... drop and... I can't quite make out this last bit. Archer to T'Pol...
T'Pol: No.

Archer: AAAAHHHHHHHHHHH. Thank God for that, I was a bit worried there. I think I just figured out why they called it "Launch Bay Two"...

Congrats to the winners Cooleddie74, SFRabid, Nerys Myk, Rat Boy, and jongredic! Welcome back to the winner's circle each of you!

I would like to give an honorable mention to Mistral and Piper this contest, yours very nearly won too ! (But no Rice-a-Roni for you)!


The Grand Prize:

Your very own NX-01 panel button set! Play along with Captain Archer at home!



Our next contest is a collection of pics from Fallen Hero, Oasis and Fusion, in a tribute to one of the unfortunate realities of life, even in the 22nd century: annoying coworkers:

_______________________________________________________

Do it! Do it now!

 

[Rat Boy]

Mayweather: "Do I lean over your shoulder and tell you how to captain?"

When Phlox was out sick, Tucker jumped at the chance to handle T'Pol's physical.

T'Pol: "Me? Join your crew? But you are all emotional."

Tolaris: "Yes, but we have free dental coverage. Have a look."

 

[Captain Zog]

Archer: "What the frick is the point of this handrail?"
Mayweather: "Captain, the Klingons are attacking. Remember?"

Trip: "I'm detecting an alien presence growing beneath your shirt - and it's growing fast. I think you'd better take it off and let me investigate further."

Star Trek director (dressed as Vulcan) to Jolene Blalock: "You know, we woundn't need to do this if you'd just learned your lines before we started filming!"

 

[jgdst]

YAY! Thanks for the win

Mayweather: I've finished the helm upgrade, sir! You like?
Archer: I do... I especially like how you've got T'Pol's monitor to act as a chest-level camera. Good work! Hoshi, put me on shipwide. Archer to all hands: Ensign Mayweather has arrived!
T'Pol: *sigh*

T'Pol: Mr Tucker, is that an X-ray flashlight
Trip: Ummm... No?
T'Pol: *sigh*

Tolaris: I'll just hand you this padd... OHHH, oops! Whammy!
T'Pol: You're trying to touch my breast aren't you?
Tolaris: What can I say? I like the way you're put together.
T'Pol: *sigh*

One more try:

Archer: No, Helmsman, NO! You're doing it wrong. Just look at these navigation logs... who the hell is this "Mayweather" anyway?! That's such a made up name!
Mayweather: Yeah, you'd better hold on! See how you cope with an EMERGENCY STOP!
*screeeeech*

 

[Gertch]

Archer: "I dub this the Riker stance. I don't know why, I just am."

Trip: "Your headlights are bigger but mine is brighter."

 

[Nerys Myk]

Thanks for the win

ARCHER: So when is that helmsman supposed to get here? We need to get underway.

MAYWEATHER: I'm sitting right here sir!

TUCKER: Flashlight. Headlights. (snicker)

T'POL: Humans

TOLARIS: Just a little document relieving me of any responsibility if something goes wrong during the meld. No big deal. Standard stuff

 

[Skywalker]

Archer: "Here, Travis, let me show you how to--"
Mayweather: "I will knock you the **** out."

Trip: "Hey there, good-lookin'. Come here often?"
T'Pol: "Actually, this is my first time aboard a Kantare vessel."
Trip: "Why do you always have to ruin my fun?"

Tolaris: "I have something I'd like you to read."
T'Pol: "The Kama Sutra?"
Tolaris: "Cooleddie loaned it to me."

 

[cooleddie74]

TRAVIS:"No, sir.

The ship doesn't have a clutch. Now can you please go?"

TRIP:"Nice rack.

No ghost would be flashin' THOSE sweater puppies."

"They're called MAD LIBS, Subcommander.

The Earthmen swear by them."

 

[cooleddie74]

ARCHER:"You always asked why this helm console has a safety grip?

You're about to find out. Flood it!!!"

 

[SFRabid]

Archer: "Don't look now but two women are checking us out at 9 o'clock."
Merriweather: "They are waiting or your orders."

Trip: "Notice how the light reflects up at a perfect 90 degree angle when I point the flashlight at your chest. That means the top of your breast have a 45 degree slope."

T'Pol: "My friends told me not to date an engineer."

Tolaris: "Why do you keep lookiing away when I talk to you?"

T'Pold: "It might have something to do with the garlic bread you ate for lunch."

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Archer: Man, this is the coolest pose ever. I can't believe I invented this.

Riker: "Computer, end program.

... bitch."

Tucker: "Pew pew."

Nintendo of Vulcan Salesman: "Perhaps it is time you upgraded to a DS?"

 

[Rat Boy]

Tolaris: "Assholes at table three only left a ten percent tip."

 

[Gertch]

Tolaris: "Let us not get distracted by the technical aspects and simply start the breast meld process now."

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Mayweather: Something smells like teen spirit.
Archer: That's my crotch with a little bit of that reporter girlfriend of yours mixed in.

Trip: Wanna play hide the Warp 5 engine?

Vulcan Dude: As you can see by my calculations, your left breast is point-eight millimeters smaller than the right.

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Mayweather: "If you don't put some pants that cover your junk on right now, I will get some screentime. Of my fist connecting to your face."

 

[Piper]

Thanks for the mention Triskelion!

Here are mine for this one:

Mayweather (thinking): ... Hmm. I never noticed before what a handsome man the Captain is. Look at him there, so strong, so forceful, in control, always knowing just what to do. I wonder if he'd mind if I just gave him a quick peck on the cheek?

Trip tries to impress T'Pol with the size of his lightsaber.

Tolaris: I drew a picture of a sehlat for you. Do you like it?

 

[Turd Ferguson]

"Travis, if you EVER mouth off like that to me again... well, have you ever seen what happens to a pair of testicles caught in an airlock going from full stop to warp factor 4.6?"

"One of the perks of being a senior officer, Sub-Commander, is having access to all the turn-ons of ships personnel."

"For a more stimulating experience during my upcoming pon farr, I have assembled some reading you may find most pleasing. You'll find a schematic for the Voyager 6 probe, a highly analytical look into the teachings of Surak, and a copy of War and Peace."

 

[Alyssa]

Trip: Gigiti gigiti gigiti oh yeah!!!!!

 

[Nerys Myk]

TRIP TUCKERS NO FAIL PICK UP LINES

#32 "So what color are your nacelle caps?"

 

[Triskelion]

After warp two, raise her to warp three. After that, increase it to four. Nice and easy. Watch out for that star. Good. Good.
Sir, do I come to the pool and knock the balls out of your hands?

- I'm not touching you. Since you're Vulcan you can't be annoyed. See? Not touching you. Not the left one. Not the right one. Not touching you. Left. Right. Right. Left.
- Logical, Commander. However I will be bribing a Maco to beat the shit out of you.