Caption Contest 12: Up a Creek

[Triskelion]

Put down your dumbbells and wipe the green stuff from your chin, it's time to announce the winners!

The first image:

Archer: "You know, your dad looks a little like Kermit the Frog. Only bigger. And more pissed off. And carrying a twelve gauge."

The second image:

Over in the corner there Howie Mandel tries to get himself in shape for the Orions by eating corn chips and watching the Buccaneers game.

Photoshop Award of Excellence:

BAKULA: What? We were just running our lines!

The Multicap Award:

Dr Navaar: And the bottom line?
Archer: P... ampersand? .... The symbol for the Artist formerly known as Prince ...
Dr Navaar: Wrong, wrong, WRONG
Archer: I guess it really does make you blind...

Director: Aaaaand... CUT!
Keating: Wow, for a minute there, I thought you were going to over-act that scene...
Montgomery: I've got ONE line this season, back off!

And a special award I've created just for this occasion, the Zig Award:

Orion: BITCH!
Archer: You just not just call my 1st officer a bitch...
T'Pol: I show you a bitch [jumps her]
Archer: [steps back] No,no Malcolm you know we don't stop cat fights here.

Congratulations to our ever-entertaining winners Bat Boy, Nebusj, Nearly Dead, jongredic, and T'Lin! And congratulations to all who played.

Your prize:

Your very own Rascals episode! Replicate some crayons and get coloring!
(Great for the office, especially if you use red and go waaay outside the lines)!

And bonus LOLRicky!

Our next contest takes us up Carbon Creek without a paddle. See the first, yes the first Vulcans to visit Earth! Moe, Lucy and McFly!

___________________________
Live long and vegetate!

 

[Rat Boy]

Mestral: "Ricearoni?"

T'Mir: "It is the San Francisco treat."

Stron: "I do not understand. Why doesn't the Beaver simply neck pinch the older boys?"

T'Mir: "Will you stop whining about stone knives and bearskins?"

Man (thinking): I'd like to give her a shine on Track 29.

 

[Nerys Myk]

MESTRAL: Dang, I fergot muh chaw.

T'MIR: Don't get lost in the part.

MAN: Hurmf. I thought those people rode in seperate cars.

 

[Nerys Myk]

Look at the one called "Moe". Is it possible that Vulcans have been here before?

 

[Turd Ferguson]

"That dirty bitch didn't take that coupon off our Malt-O-Meal Apple Zings."

"We must warn the Vulcan mothership that somehow Earth has acquired the capability for constructing cybernetic lifeforms. And that its name is... Howdy Doody."

"Oh, just so you know... your meatloaf was overcooked by 1.2 degrees celsius. You may be a first rate science officer, but your cooking sucks. As does your ability to make mop water."

"Well!!! According to this magazine, Elvis' music is known to cause kids to behave in deviant ways and worship Satan!"

 

[Triskelion]

Mestral: Oh boy! Sears catalog. We don't have anything like these babes on Vulcan.

T'Mir, please give me all our money. I wish to send it to this evangelist. What spectacular hair!

Mestral: This is the worst attempt at constructing a mnemonic memory circuit I have ever seen. Where did you ever learn to design circuits this badly?
Stron: I learned it from you, Dad! I learned it from watching you! <throws down broom and runs out crying>

T'Mir (thinking): I am completely befuddled by human staring contest technique.

 

[E-Blonde]

Mestral: Why did that clerk start acting odd when I asked her what puppy chow tasted like?

 

[Shatmandu]

T'Mir: "I purchased two containers of corn-based cooking oil. One for food preparation, and one for our ... personal use ..."

T'Mir: "I do not 'Like Ike.' I prefer the other, more Vulcan-like, Stevenson."

 

[Rat Boy]

Stron: "Incredible! The whole fist!"

T'Mir: "Meh."

 

[jgdst]

Yay, thanks for the win

Mestral: I remember when your left hand used to cup me like that...

Stron: Doing that OCD page turning thing with your left hand again? I remember when you used to do that to Mestral instead of that book...

Mestral: Lucky plate, I remember when that left hand used to do that to me...

T'Mir: I wonder where Mestral is. Oh well, more left hand for ME! ohh yeah

 

[cooleddie74]

MESTRAL:"Uh-oh.

The merchant forgot my S & H Green Stamps."

"Just ignore her, dear.

THOSE types get off at the next stop."

 

[cooleddie74]

MESTRAL:"Curious.

Why doesn't this Lucy woman simply kill her immigrant husband for his nightclub insurance money?"

 

[cooleddie74]

MESTRAL:"Be careful cleaning that up.

Before I regurgitated, I had eaten quite a large quantity of Earth peanuts."

 

[Nerys Myk]

MESTRAL:Curious. They call him "Uncle Milty" yet he dresses as a female.

 

[Nebusj]

The second image:

Over in the corner there Howie Mandel tries to get himself in shape for the Orions by eating corn chips and watching the Buccaneers game.

Ah, thank you.

``I hope you are satisfied with the scene you made in the store, Mestral. I told you this era and location were inappropriate to performing your otherwise excellent pirate routine.''

``Can you imagine how different the humans' lives will be when someday they invent a primary color?''

Suddenly, an Arthur T'Miller plot broke out!

``I'm not an alien from space.''
``Oh, that's lovely. We're not a pair of strangers thrown together on a desperate cross-country trek to Mount Rushmore to foil another nation's spies.''
``It's pleasant not to meet you in that case.''
``Likewise.''

 

[Triskelion]

Mestral: He squeezed every tomato vegetable and broke the chicken fetus containment units.
T'Mir: Next time wait to see which deity THEY follow before guessing. And for the record, babaganoosh was NOT the correct response.
Mestral: No it was not.

Stron: Don't look now - Mrs Kravitz is looking in the window. Assume the normal human recreational position.
T'Mir: I hope you are praying correctly to the worship unit.
Stron: Yes, I'm quite certain this is the correct display of spiritual devotion. However I think humans are monolibrilectors.
T'Mir: That is not a word.

T'Mir: Stron, did you mutilate the grass blades like I asked you to?
Stron: That machine was not efficient, and it produced toxic levels of noxious gases. I used a mind meld instead, to convince the grass to retain its current height.
Mestral: I hope no one saw you melding with the lawn, young man.
Mrs Kravitz: Abner! I saw that devil boy molesting the yard! Abner!

T'Mir: Could I interest you in some literature about the Surakian philosophy of logic?
Man: Oh, one of these.

 

[Rat Boy]

Mestral: "Another day in this shithole called Grover's Corners."

 

[Gil T.Azell]

Mestral: "T'Mir, what are all these 'D' size batteries for, you're not approaching Pon farr are you? These will not power that device!"

 

[Hopeful Romantic]

Mestral: He squeezed every tomato vegetable and broke the chicken fetus containment units.
T'Mir: Next time wait to see which deity THEY follow before guessing. And for the record, babaganoosh was NOT the correct response.
Mestral: No it was not.

T'Mir: Stron, did you mutilate the grass blades like I asked you to?
Stron: That machine was not efficient, and it produced toxic levels of noxious gases. I used a mind meld instead, to convince the grass to retain its current height.
Mestral: I hope no one saw you melding with the lawn, young man.
Mrs Kravitz: Abner! I saw that devil boy molesting the yard! Abner!

"chicken fetus containment units"
"Stron, did you mutilate the grass blades like I asked you to?"
"I hope no one saw you melding with the lawn, young man."

Stop it yer killing me

 

[Nerys Myk]

JOHN: That's not your Grandfather.

BEATLES: Hey lady! Can we have our hairstyle back?