DS9 Caption Contest #44: Jadzia Dax, Destined for [Spoiler Alert]

[LeadHead]

Good evening everyone! Thanks for a lot of great captions, lets get to business!

First up to the plate, we have "The Wrath of Kai" Award, going to:

Sisko: "The Kai just arrived. Please tell me that you found missing Orb."
Odo: "I'm sorry, sir, but the Orb is..."
O'Brien: "Right here in my hands! It's... err..."
Worf: "..Cloaked?"
O'Brien: "Yes, yes. That's it. The Prophets cloaked it... for some reason."
Sisko: "Sigh. Cloaked. Could I hold it, then?"
O'Brien: "Umm... well..."
Odo: "It's phase cloaked, sir. You can't hold it. It would fall through your hands."
Sisko: "Mm-hm. How are you holding it, Chief?"
O'Brien: "..."
Sisko: "Anyone?"
Odo & Worf: "..."
O'Brien: "I'm going to go with tachyons, sir."
Sisko: "Sigh."

Next, we have the "Dangerous Hairstyles" Award, going to:

Guard: Your perm is an offense to our culture.

Next, we have the "Historical Inaccuracies" Award, going to:

O'Brien: "Julian, I don't recall any tanks at the Battle of the Alamo."

Bashir: "You're right, Chief."

Quark: "Morn has 50 strips of latinum on the Mexicans. I just wanted to tip the odds a bit..."

Next, we have the "Well, that answers that" Award, going to:

Bashir: Do you see the light?
O'Brien: (thinking) What light?

Next, we have the "I'm not an officer, don't call me Sir" Award, going to:

Worf: "Sir, I don't think that method will be an effective solution for the station's cockroach problem."

I couldn't decide between these two photoshops, so they're both winners!

O'Brien: "Yep, that's the one. Click on it."
Sisko: "OK, clicked... and... what the? I can't believe it. I've been Rick Rolled."

And...

O'BRIEN: It's was my turn to watch the kid, you try telling Keiko I couldn't!

Cop: "The viewers were asked which character should get a beating. They chose you. That's all there is to it".

O'Brien: "The other candidates were an elderly nun, a six-year-old girl and a puppy with its leg in a splint!"

Cop: "Your point?"

Thanks to all of our participants and congratulations to our winners! Continuing on in our Characters Caption Contest, Jadzia Dax will take the spotlight!

Enjoy!

 

[LeadHead]

Dax hogged Worf's toys all the time.

Odo: Please Ladies, don't fight over me.

Dax: Actually, we were fighting over who gets to make a run for it.

Dax: Romeo, Romeo...

Quark: Oh, Jadzia....

Worf: She's talking to me, Ferengi!

Dax: When I get drunk, I use Federation Glasses! They're great.

Worf: I'm in this commercial under protest.

Odo: According to this, we didn't cover the spread this weekend.

Sisko: Chief, get us an extension on our credit line.

 

[boco]

Dax: Made in Cina. ...WHAT??

 

[Finn]

Dax: Made in Cina. ...WHAT??

Worf: Russia..the legendary Admirak Chekov said all things began in Russia. And Minsk

Dax: *thinking* here he goes, babbling about how great Minsk is

 

[boco]

Odo: The people on the space station compained about the klingon opera coming from your quarters on the Defiant, so the captain and I came out with a reasonable solution. Defiant will be stationed at 9.5 light years from the station and you'll have to use runabouts to come and go

Jadzia(thinking): What worf doesn't know is that if he mentions Minsk one more time, I'll kick him in the balls . I swear on the bat leth of Kahless..

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Kor: "Is watching her caress that thing giving you a boner too?"
Worf mumbling: "Kai Winn naked on a cold day, Kai Winn naked on a cold day, Kai Winn naked on a cold day... Damn it!"

Dax: "Will you two hurry it up."
Kira: "We're finally talking here."
Dax: "One toilet on the station! There's a queue reaching around the promenade. Can't you talk somewhere else?"

 

[boco]

Dax: "Will you two hurry it up."
Kira: "We're finally talking here."
Dax: "One toilet on the station! There's a queue reaching around the promenade. Can't you talk somewhere else?"

Quark: Jadzia, you must help me with the Sisko.. he's gonna put Odo to arrest me..
Dax: Quark, I'm a starfleet officer, I must follow orders
Quark: But he's your old man, you know him for decades, I'm Sure you could talk him to not..
Dax: Who?me?no.. I can't..odo'd Kira's boyfriend....she'd stop talking to me
Quark: I'll give you all the latinum I owe you from the tongo games we played
Dax: I can't, Odo would put me in the brig too if he finds out..
Quark: Plus 1o% of interests..
Dax: 2o
Quark: 15
Dax: Deal.. that's my favourite ferengi.. that's why I love doing business with you..
Quark: Damn she's good at this..You could rewrite the Rules of aqusition book..
Dax:I know.. Don't flatter me, I won't lower it from 15

 

[Ln X]

Thanks for the win LeadHead! I love these caption competitions!

Kor: (whispering) We wants the sword!
Jadzia: Kor you're not having the sword in a million years! You plotted like a Romulan and you tried to kill my Par'Mach'kai, you are bereft of the honour to carry something so mighty!
Worf: Jadzia is right! The sword should have gone to me!
Jadzia: (thinking) What an idiot...

Jadzia: Well, well, what are you two doing here?
Kira: Talking, that's all...
Jadzia: Really?
Odo: (thinking) There's goes the moment, I was so close to asking Kira out for dinner...

Jadzia: The man I'm thinking of is so handsome, smart, couregeous, sexy, and ooh, he's just worth dying for!
Quark: Jadzia... I didn't realize you felt that way towards me!
Jadzia: Dream on Quark! It's Worf I want not you!
Quark: Oh...

Jadzia: It's a glass you know!
Worf: (thinking) Am I to marry this woman of such low intelligence?

O'Brien: Don't worry Dax, the sensors will eventually find Worf.
Jadzia: Good because he's cheated on me for the last time...

 

[Finn]

Dax: Thank you for the Alamoized Minsk holoprogram, Julian.

 

[Captain Crow]

Dax: If you two don't want to find out how sharp this thing is I suggest you take your hands off my ass.

 

[Nerys Myk]

DAX: Thanks for stopping by. I've been trying for hours and I can't figure out how to get this through the door.

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Dax: "I dunno, guys. I look at this thing, and I just think 'Texas.'"

Dax: "Why, Nerys, that's a very intriguing idea! But...do we really need Odo?"

Dax: "I have always depended on the kindness of strangers."
Quark: "Well...you're barking up the wrong tree here, lady."

Dax: "Worf gave me this big lecture before we got here about not making a fool of myself and embarrassing him tonight. I have to say I found that very condescending and demeaning! As if I would ever embarrass my little Worfy-dorfy! Could you bring me another double scotch, please? And keep 'em comin'!"

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Worf (incredulous): "You used your college loans to pay for this?"

Jadzia: "Yeah, but it's gonna look great on my wall.

Next to my ninja swords and Star Wars posters."

Odo: "What's so funny about a 'caption this' contest?"

Jadzia: "What a guy; oh Quar-"

Quark: "Go on..."

Jadzia: "Quarblian-dorantu Ektfrll. The nicest man with six heads I've ever met."

Quark: "Oh. Yeah. Ok."

Jadzia: "I don't always drink fluids, but when I do, it's usually water with food dye in it.

Or maple syrup."

She is the most interesting woman in the galaxy.

Sisko: "What do you think, Constable?"

Odo: "Too many in-jokes. It's gonna bite us in the butt when we go to HD."

 

[AdmiralGarak]

Worf: "I've installed an old-fashioned Klingon steering device."
Kor: "The spikey bits are for dishonorable pilots that fall asleep as they fly the ship."

Dax: "We got dates with those three cute brothers from Astrometrics, but we need a third girl."
Odo: "Why are you telling me... Oh, no..."

After Dax's seventh attempt to slap her comm badge failed, Quark realized that bringing every member of the crew triple servings of Chief O'Brien's special home brewed coffee might have been a bad idea.

Dax: "I've got the Federation glass! The text on back says, 'to boldly drink what no man has drunk before...'"
Worf: (grumbles) "I wanted the Federation glass. All I got was the Pakled glass. Its text says 'Give us things. Things that make us need to go...'"

Odo: "And if you look at this status report from Bajoran Militia you'll see... Oh, no..."
Dax: "Oops. Sorry, that's our date video."
Sisko: "Check out that hottie with Dax and the Major, Chief. {wolf-whistle}"
Odo: "Oh, shut up."
O'Brien: "Boy, if I wasn't married..."
Odo: "Please, shut up."
Dax: "I heard your date wants to see you again."
Odo: "I can arrest you all, you know."

 

[Nerys Myk]

ODO: Ladies, I can be as much, as little or as many men as you need.

 

[Nerys Myk]

ODO: I got nothing.

SISKO: I dont plan to lose this one, people!!!!

DAX: Drawing a blank, sir.

O'BRIEN: Uh, a Carl Spock shop?


The other three shake their heads and sigh.

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Dax: "Okay, everybody get ready! When Odo triggers the door release, we all rush in and yell, 'Surprise! Happy Birthday!'"
O'Brien: "What if he's masturbating in there?"
* long, silent pause *
Sisko: "Or...we could just send him an e-card..."

 

[Mistral]

Jadzia(thinking) "If I swing this straight back over my head and duck at the same time..."

 

[Mistral]

"...and tonight's Galactic Lotto numbers are..."

 

[Mistral]

ODO: I got nothing.

SISKO: I dont plan to lose this one, people!!!!

DAX: Drawing a blank, sir.

O'BRIEN: Uh, a Carl Spock shop?


The other three shake their heads and sigh.

SISKO: You only like him because you have the same hair.