Facts about Uhura

[erebus]

hmm, i think i'm beginning to detect a subtle trend in this thread, in which i'm virtually the only dissenter, for Uhura that tends to neglet her intellect in a rather primitive fashion in favour of her more, admittedly equally superlative, but nevertheless physical attributes.

She is so hot, she just translated all of your big words in 27 different languages.

Aha, yeah thats more like it! But i hope it doesn't kill the thead to talk about her brains and beauty!

 

[theFirebottle]

Uhura picks up languages with such skill and speed they wake up naked in their beds and dehydrated the next day wondering what the hell happened, then they go to the police and file charges. But the charges don't stick because languages aren't legal entities.

 

[theFirebottle]

When Uhura makes a typographical error, English orthography is retconned so that her spelling of the word is not only correct, but always has been.

 

[Phily B]

Uhura is black.

 

[Islander]

Once you go black you never go back?

 

[erebus]

Uhura taught the Vulcans how to play the Vulcan lyre with such skill and grace, and her compositions where so pitch perfect and structured that they ended up basing their whole system of logic on it.

 

[Islander]

When Uhura makes a typographical error, English orthography is retconned so that her spelling of the word is not only correct, but always has been.

Writting was discovered when she accidentally travelled in time. No long after the discovery of fire cuz she soooooo hot!

 

[erebus]

That was no accident: she had built a flux capacitor out of some old duotronic hearing aids with an old soldering iron and used a negligible fraction of the Thermal energy she generated from herself to provide the 2.21 gigawatts to power it.

 

[theFirebottle]

Uhura used her aforementioned phenomenal body heat, her comprehensive knowledge of the genetic-family linguistic relationship between Romulan and Vulcan languages, and sheer awesome to weld together an alliance between the two civilizations. Then she gave every Vulcan a hug and they felt better, even though Vulcans don't usually like hugs.

 

[Islander]

Uhura is the reason Vulcans have Ponn Farr: She goes there every 7 years.

The name comes from what a teethless Vulcan said the first time they saw her.

 

[erebus]

That ones too subtle for me, but i like it.

 

[Islander]

She is so hot, she starred in her own x-rated versions of Star Trek:The search for cocks.

 

[erebus]

ok i get that one

 

[erebus]

When Uhura discovered this thread in the ships historical database, she was wise enough to know that boys will be boys and was quite amused by its length (ahem).

 

[Islander]

When Uhura discovered this thread in the ships historical database, she was wise enough to know that boys will be boys and was quite amused by its length (ahem).

But she got pissed when she noticed Robau's page being 113 pages. Boy is she hot when she's pissed...

 

[apenpaap]

When Uhura discovered this thread in the ships historical database, she was wise enough to know that boys will be boys and was quite amused by its length (ahem).

Especially when she compared it to Captain Robau's thread length (ahem).

 

[erebus]

Uhura used her aforementioned phenomenal body heat, her comprehensive knowledge of the genetic-family linguistic relationship between Romulan and Vulcan languages, and sheer awesome to weld together an alliance between the two civilizations. Then she gave every Vulcan a hug and they felt better, even though Vulcans don't usually like hugs.

And Spock slapped his double-raised brow thinking 'Ah Sehlat doo doo, now why didn't i think of that' and remembered Vulcan was a matriarchy and the council made Uhura the highest matriarch. And the Romulans made her Empress Uhura the Magnificent as well.

 

[erebus]

When Uhura discovered this thread in the ships historical database, she was wise enough to know that boys will be boys and was quite amused by its length (ahem).

Especially when she compared it to Captain Robau's thread length (ahem).

oh oh, don't want to go there

 

[Mereope]

Uhura is so hot that during her final exams in marine mammal languages, she entered San Francisco Bay to translate the language of the humpback whale -causing the water to immediately boil, steam clouds to envelope the city and Starfleet Academy, and several species of rare marine animals to become extinct.

Which she then had served to her as Fruits de Mer by her favorite Vulcan cabana boy.

 

[erebus]

with some flava beans and a nice cianti