I was thinking the other day Disney could have made something a many times cooler
and more affordable with the money and space it's squandered on this nonsense: namely, the opportunity to star in a 15-20 minute
Star Wars short film.
Consider the
Star Trek Adventure, which ran at Universal Studios Florida from '91 to '96, and which, using only a blue screen and some rudimentary props and costumes, let people star in
a short flick featuring the TOS cast:
Now imagine doing something like that with
today's technology. Instead of a fuzzy VHS with primitive and obvious compositing, you'd get a razor-sharp HD image, a personalized Blu-ray and case, and a code that lets you and your friends stream your story from the Disney+ app worldwide.
Imagine how easily digital doubles, paired with deepfakery, could insert you into action sequences, augmented with a few minutes' worth of reaction shots filmed in person. Picture how smaller versions of the LED sets used in
The Mandalorian could produce cinema-quality lighting effects for that scene on the alien planet. You could read your lines off strategically placed Teleprompters, or be a badass and memorize them beforehand in order to give your best possible performance. AI-powered rotoscoping would let you wield lightsabers that look nearly as good as those ones in the movies, and immersive game engine technology in the studio would give you tangible visual cues that make you a natural action performer during the battle sequences. (When you drove the flight stick portside, the starfield moved in perfect unison.)
Large parts of the filming process (reaction shots, expressions, voice-over, etc.) would be automated, thereby reducing costs, but some bits (the more dialogue-heavy stuff) would be overseen by in-person guides. For, say, $300 or so, you could spend 4-5 hours shooting a handful of scenes, and customize the story: do you escape by the skin of your teeth? Go down in flames as a heroic martyr, as your comrades vow to never forget you? Sell out your cause, and live in shameful luxury? Or perhaps discover a conscience, and suddenly throw your lot in with what's right, as your peers become enemies?
Over time, if the attraction is a hit, digital sets featuring fresh environments would make for an ever-improving and diversifiable experience. New locations and storylines would be introduced, and older ones would be phased out. Across multiple visits, you could reprise your role for a sequel or prequel. Spend a few minutes filming extra material, and you might cameo in a friend's movie, even if they film their story at a park continents away and years later, either reprising your own character, or as a whole new one. Maybe you brought a significant other to the park? Include them, too. (Due to war-themed content, however, all performers must be 21 and over, with exceptions for service members.) For those with physical/health limitations, moreover, as much action stuff as necessary could be deepfaked.
Once you've done your time in the studio and are back at the hotel, if you so choose (no pressure), you can review and choose your own best line deliveries in the comfort of your room. (Alternatively, the guides can do this for you.) Customize your character's starship's design (or maybe you did that days ago), and let the rendering/assembly complete overnight. For a truly memorable finish to your time in the spotlight, book a time to screen your movie for family and friends at the hotel, or even in a corner of Galaxy's Edge itself, in a specially built theater with cinema-quality projection and sound. (And if you ever go on a Disney cruise, your adventure is automatically brought along, for similar screenings at sea.)
Of course, before turning in after that hard day's work, you took a nice, hot bath... but you couldn't help wondering just what that "hair-raising mishap on Razell" your character mentioned was about. So, you make a quick selection on the datapad before bed, and the next morning, an astromech droid delivers a freshly printed paperback telling the whole thrilling story, with your character's unique name, physical description, etc, for the trip home. Did your character make a sudden change of side in the movie? Or maybe another character noted how your character is particularly known for their recklessness or caution? Well, with this novella, it all makes sense.
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Now, tell me that those few hours of admittedly pricey but still affordable activity wouldn't be far more memorable and enjoyable than an awkward 2+ days of LARPing that, rather than being as cinematic as the movies and shows, was heavily sanitized (because Galactic Starcruise is a family-friendly
war experience, after all), and
didn't let you take a nice swim and explore the rest of the parks the day after, as this one does. Go on,
try.
