Starfleet sticks Picard with 30 Klingon Targs and has one year to teach them how to sing Klingon opera or else the Klingons will declare war on the Federation. Picard gets his old comrade Commander Worf to help him do it only Worf is recasted and now played by Linn-Manuel Miranda. Jason
Picard becomes fascinated with one of Gene Wilder's old movie characters and, in appreciation, decides to break into burlesque as The Silver Streaker.
I don't know. He couldn't get that pig Pua to sing in Moana. (I'll cut him some slack on that chicken, though...)
Picard is transferred immediately to another area of the Federation after causing a diplomatic ruckus in his old neighbourhood. He's been in a bit of a fight and Bev got scared. Alternatively, Picard replaces Geoffrey as the Fresh Prince butler. I'm fine with either scenario.
After Mr. Homn was killed during the Dominion War, Jean-Luc is hired as Lwaxana's new butler and servant.
The dumbest Picard show idea I can think of is setting the show in a version of the Star Trek universe where Romulus was destroyed by a supernova.
Don't know if this is dumb or not: Picard and his merry band destroy Section 31 once and for all, as foretold in Trek lit.
romulus being destroyed turns out to have been just one of riker's holodeck programs. picard is seen to laugh that anyone (anyone at all) could think that such a thing actual happen in the real universe.
Picard develops telekinetic powers and is now some kind of Section 31 secret agent. He has to rescue a bunch of female hostages from an old Dominion facility, which he does. In the runabout, he can see that all their clothes have rotted off because they've been in the camp for so long. One of them is bending over, two of them are kissing because they've turned lesbian. The ladies are trying to be discreet, but Picard had seen everything... He's seen it all.
Well, Sir Patrick was involved in the writers room early on... perhaps he did sell that screenplay after all. Michael Chabon: "So it's a comedy?" Sir Patrick: "No..."
I could see him as a itinerant holodeck program critic, wandering from planet to planet eviscerating badly conceived holodeck programs for local entertainment outlets. And not a few of them could be old TNG episodes for thier meta-value. Each episode would have him stepping in at particularly egregions points to offer his stingers and each ep would therefore end with him stating with disgust, "End fucking program!"
Sela makes an appearance, and she somehow still has Tasha in captivity after all these years. We can have Denise Crosby back in two roles!
The Enterprise's top 2 in a dynamic duet - tinwhistle and trombone for Picard & Riker, with special guest appearances by Harry Kim on clarinet. Called "Make It So Fabulous."
Only if it's "funny" Q and not scary Q. (I always hated Q as comic relief. The idea of an omnipotent super-being with Q's level of maturity should always be scary.)