Like me, Ghislaine, you like to get it all out, in the open - not being one to keep anything bottled up, inside. I like how you organised them, here, for easy reference. And I will do my utmost to answer them. One ... by ... one ...
When it comes to Janeway being a competent starship Captain, and a woman of integrity and all of that, you're preaching to the choir, here - I assure you. However, I suspect that she did, indeed, need a Man's Love. But I'll try to convince you of it, no longer. You win this round!
An author killing Janeway off, to make their shitty-assed novel sell at all, is pretty weak stuff. And yes, her job is very important to her and she did it well. I've never posted otherwise. But I do draw the line at holo-lovers. She just needed an adult toy, she never had to resort to taking a leaf out of Harry Kim's book, for momentary satisfaction. There are many toy options, I'm sure, in the 24th century. Some even operate by remote control, that Chakotay could've been revving up, by pushing buttons in his own quarters. "Let's see how she likes ... THIS!!!"
Whirr... buzz! BUZZ! ... Whirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr ...
Kathryn did reject Chakotay, soundly. I've conceded this fact, myself - on many occasions. And he should've just let go of his fantasies about her, I know. But she was there, every day. He worked closely with her. She was always in close proximity and these were the days when women were scarce, in the Delta Quadrant. I know you feel there were plenty of women onboard for him to select from, but ... once their situation was firmly established, women made damn sure that they wouldn't have to do without. They used all of their feminine whiles to attract every available Man on the ship, save for Vorik and Harry Kim. And Chakotay wasn't in his 20's, so he wasn't on their radar, as it were. That left him with his fantasies of Kathryn and whatever he could net from the Delta Quadrant, from time to time. But his haul was often nothing more than the continued hope of finding someone, down the line. Out of desperation, he's even had 2 Borg women, on the show, you know? But I have to hand it to him, when he scored Kellin, She was the only woman he got with who was actually hot. I thought, "Finally! Chakotay's about to get his just desserts." Oh, well ... at least he got right back in the saddle.
None of the other Captains were inaccessible, though. Kirk was in and out of alien women, like a Time Square pick-pocket. Picard had several lovers, despite his Advanced Years. Sisko got laid. Archer got women. I know you like how Captain Janeway was chaste on her long voyage, but ... she's the only Captain who ever was. Granted, she was not in her twenties and I would not want to see her in sex scene after sex scene. But, really, she made the Delta Quadrant much harder on herself than it had to be. And that's for certain!