Who invited you?

[Maestro]

There's a reason I said another story....

I doubt I would include an option for a widowed friend to bring a +1, unless I knew s/he was actively seeing someone, actively interested in seeing someone, or had been widowed many years ago. If the person in question were widowed with in the last six months, I absolutely would omit the option for a +1, unless, again, they were seeing someone.

Certainly if I omitted it and the RSVP indicated a +1, I wouldn't blink.

The point is, at least from where I sit, that some sensitivity would be required from me, and I would have to gauge the situation accordingly.

My paternal grandfather has been dead for over 25 years. When my grandmother gets a wedding invitation, it upsets her to have the option of a +1. People who really know her simply invite her. People who know her very well address the letter to Mrs. <My Grandfather's name.>

Emily Post may allow such a thing, but kindness and compassion overrule EP in this case.

As I don't know Thena's Dad's situation, it would be impossible to speculate on whether or not an option for a +1 would or should be included.

Which is why I didn't really want to get into this in the first place.

 

[Thena]

The invitation was addressed to "The Thena Family" which makes it all more confusing. And my dad as well as the bride's parents come from a culture where inviting the family means that you bring the grandparents, kids and even a cousin or two.

When I get married, it's going to be in Las Vegas and I'm not inviting anyone. Much, much easier that way.

 

[Kestra]

Everyone should elope!

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

I eloped, so to speak (kind of hard to literally do it when it takes a month to get a marriage license.) I got married at the airport. I was completely free of wedding brouhaha.

 

[Kestra]

I enjoyed the brouhaha, but so many don't.

 

[Maestro]

The brouhaha can be very fun if everyone involved can keep their focus on the purpose for it instead of becoming a _______zilla.

When I got married, I handled arrangements for the ceremony and music. My wife handled the menu and entertainment for the reception. My mother-in-law handled decorations and desserts. Our wedding was exceptionally low stress, beautiful, and elegant.

Being a music teacher, handling the music was a snap. I hired my college trumpet professor, had him hire the organist (the best of those he enjoyed working with), hired two singers from my church choir, gave them the playlist months in advance, and then just enjoyed at the ceremony.

 

[Thena]

And I have an update!

Still haven't heard back from the bride, but I managed to talk to her parents. The boyfriend did get a wedding invitation after all. Still doesn't mean that I'm thrilled to have him crashing at my place, but what else can I do? Much of our extended family seem to think that my sister is going to marry the guy, so I guess I should try to get along with him.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

The brouhaha can be very fun if everyone involved can keep their focus on the purpose for it instead of becoming a _______zilla.

When I got married, I handled arrangements for the ceremony and music. My wife handled the menu and entertainment for the reception. My mother-in-law handled decorations and desserts.

I don't care for ceremony, menu, entertainment, reception, decoration or desserts. Music is okay I guess.

 

[Australis]

See? Told you talking to the mother was a good idea!

You're welcome!

<staggers off into the night amazed he got something right...>

 

[Kestra]

And I have an update!

Still haven't heard back from the bride, but I managed to talk to her parents. The boyfriend did get a wedding invitation after all. Still doesn't mean that I'm thrilled to have him crashing at my place, but what else can I do? Much of our extended family seem to think that my sister is going to marry the guy, so I guess I should try to get along with him.

Glad to hear you got it sorted out.

 

[Maestro]

And I have an update!

Still haven't heard back from the bride, but I managed to talk to her parents. The boyfriend did get a wedding invitation after all. Still doesn't mean that I'm thrilled to have him crashing at my place, but what else can I do? Much of our extended family seem to think that my sister is going to marry the guy, so I guess I should try to get along with him.

Sorry to hear that Emily Post ended up screwing you over.

 

[Thena]

^Emily Post did nothing wrong. It's the sister and boyfriend who screwed up by making the assumption that they can save money by crashing with me!