If I go back far enough maybe I'll get to Kirk!!
What If: Captain Riker of the USS Voyager
- Thread starter Emperor Norton
- Start date
The common denominator of shtupping.
Good. I will succeed, I just have to keep schtupping to the source.
Unless you're planning on living another 250 years to meet Kirk in his prime and shtup him, or if you are somehow obliged to mount acertain 85 year old north Amrican male... The best you can hope for is that someone you've shtupped, will shtup someone, who'll shtup someone, who'll shtup Kirk.
And that's how an eskimo sister pays it forward.
And that's how an eskimo sister pays it forward.
I've resigned myself to never having his baby.
Because David Marcus was a loser?
NO!!!
That was his mother's doing. She kept her son from the god like influence of his father and her own genes unfortunately had a heyday because Kirk's genes were dormant, unable to be activated because they were never in the presence of Kirk.
Lucky for me MY genes are all lazy slobs so even if the baby didn't get to meet Kirk due to unfortunate temporal issues I feel confidant that Kirk's genes would prevail and the child would not be a loser OR have that horrible hair.
That was his mother's doing. She kept her son from the god like influence of his father and her own genes unfortunately had a heyday because Kirk's genes were dormant, unable to be activated because they were never in the presence of Kirk.
Lucky for me MY genes are all lazy slobs so even if the baby didn't get to meet Kirk due to unfortunate temporal issues I feel confidant that Kirk's genes would prevail and the child would not be a loser OR have that horrible hair.
You'd never disown a daughter for having bad hair?
IN the future there are sonic hair straighteners.
But I don't have that hair and Kirk doesn't have that hair so I have every confidence our baby would have been beautiful
But I don't have that hair and Kirk doesn't have that hair so I have every confidence our baby would have been beautiful
So much regret.
You should have humped your TV Set when you had the chance.
You can't knock up reruns.
You should have humped your TV Set when you had the chance.
You can't knock up reruns.
And a good thing too, or you are going to be one very busy woman at this stage of life.
Didn't you promise to have Kristen Beyer's baby if she resurrected Janeway?
I swore to have her baby but she never took me up on it! Despite delivering the goods!
Really came out ahead there
Really came out ahead there
Not saying it wouldn't have been successful, but Kate really nailed the part. I can't imagine Voyager without Kate.
How powerful are these Kirk Genes™ of which you speak? Does Baby cry in a strangely halting manner? Can Baby do a Flying Kirk Kick™? Does Baby's onesie have a habit of getting strategically ripped?
Yes, while still in the womb.
His father was the God of Thunder.
Gamora?
That movie isn't even out yet.
Meanwhile I've been watching Kyle Reese take Terminators apart since I was nine years old.
That movie isn't even out yet.
Meanwhile I've been watching Kyle Reese take Terminators apart since I was nine years old.
Hey, Thor came out after 2009's Star Trek yet you can call Kirk his son. I should be able to reference a character in a later movie too.
Now that I think about it, I'm starting to dislike NuKirk, he helped Khan kill Robocop.
