VOY Caption This 92; Mutiny!!!

[Ln X]

The weekend starts here! And now...

The Go-EMH! award goes to:

EMH: "What do you mean she's not real? We had sex last night!"

The violated crewmen award goes to;

...and then that's when Janeway - whipped it out.

<Chakotay Spit Take>

The Tuvok's flogging award goes to:

Tuvok: Shall I flog them as well?
Janeway: You mean you haven't already? Bend over and assume the position Mr Tuvok. I'll flog you myself!

The diverse genitalia award goes to:

Whispering N.D: Go for the crotch shot, captain. One swift kick between the legs. Mean, but effective.
Janeway: Not everyone keeps their genitals in the same place, lieutenant.

The wake-up-dead-character! award goes to;

EMH: Chakotay is dead!

Janeway: But he's still breathing!

EMH: I meant his character development.

///

And now the special award:

Tuvok: Captain, I regret to report that more of this 'fanfiction' has been reported over the communications relays.

Janeway: Are they?

Tuvok: I'm afraid so...

Janeway: *groans* Make sure that Harry never finds out.

///


Here are the next bunch of pictures to be captioned, the theme this week is ... mutiny!

Next caption contest 7th of December. Have fun!

 

[Ln X]

Chakotay: Coffee dispenser machine be gone!

Seska: We're going to play a game of Simon says. Simon says to do the Mexican wave... And the cha-cha...

<Kim does the cha-cha>

Seska: Sorry Kim, but you are out! (fires phaser)

Janeway: Requesting assistance, will accept any help from friend or foe to quash commander Chakotay's mutiny!

Neelix was the first person to go in the mutiny...

Chakotay: By betraying your captain Tuvok you have just committed an act of utter barbarity!!! ... Well done!

 

[Nerys Myk]

The shared dream of 90% of the Voyager crew.

JANEWAY: Who the hell encrypted the thermostat controls?!!

 

[Deranged Nasat]

"Science mocked my theories, that various pieces of decomposing human and hedgehog could be treated with essence of leola root and succesfully reanimated. But look here, Igor - it lives!"

 

[Triskelion]

JANEWAY: Who the hell encrypted the thermostat controls?!!

Crap it's already won and done!

 

[Triskelion]

Bye bye, Ensign Larry. Budget cuts, my ass.

Seska: Let me show you what we do to last-season shark-jumping new cast cutie-honeys in the Cardassian Union.

B'Elanna: Beta side!

Come out to the Delta Quadrant, we'll get together, have a few laughs. Last time I RSVP a Borg Christmas party.

Neelix: She was...five...Ocampan...years!
Universe: Oh, my bad.

From now on call me by my casino name: Chako Two-Drinks.

<Tuvok rips IDIC medallion off neck.>

 

[R. Star]

Thanks for the win!

Tuvok(off screen): This cannot be Commander Chakotay. This individual has a functioning pair of testicles, it must be a holographic ruse.

Seska: Remember us? We're the Maquis! We were around for all of three episodes of Voyager.

Janeway: Who encrypted the coffee replicator sequence file? There shall be blood!

Janeway: Tell me I can't have any coffee again!

Chakotay: Seska was working for the Cardassians, you were working for the Federation, was anyone on that ship working for me?
Tuvok: In reality the Maquis was actually a variety of intelligence organizations all spying on each other.

 

[Triskelion]

Nobody expects the Maquis Insurrection!

Chako Two-Drinks: Seska was working for the Cardassians, you were working for the Federation, was anyone on that ship working for me?

Tuvok: Wally.

Chako Two-Drinks: Figures. F*cking Wally.

 

[Turd Ferguson]

Venkman: Sorry.

Spengler: Sorry.

Stantz: I'm sorry.

Venkman: We thought you were someone else. Wait. No. We were right.

 

[Finn]

Sam Wildman: I'm sorry. I hadn't realize Naomi had transfeered the ogre of fire from the holodecks to the ship's holoemitters.

 

[Triskelion]

I gotta get rid of these pay toilets.

Vulcans are stronger than humans.
Undoubtedly.
You live longer, too.
Indubitably.
You have greater tolerance for temperature extremes.
Unquestionably.
How are you at wearing vests?
<Tuvok shuts up.>

 

[jespah]

Chako Two-Drinks: Seska was working for the Cardassians, you were working for the Federation, was anyone on that ship working for me?

Tuvok: Wally.

Chako Two-Drinks: Figures. F*cking Wally.

Wall-E? A Hello Dolly-loving trash-compacting robot from a semi-dystopic future is working for me???!! Cripes, no wonder we're lost.

 

[Mistral]

Janeway: "When they took my uniforms-I was ok with that. When they burned me with radiation-I was ok with that. But now they've stolen the coffee..."

 

[Triskelion]

What is that?
It's my tattoo.
You should have just done a "Z."
Obviously, Ensign. But I'm committed now.

Chakotay: The odds of successfully navigating an asteroid field -
B'Elanna: Shut up!
Seska: Never tell me the odds!
Chakotay: Rowwwwwrrrrrrrrrrrr!

Criticize my cooking, will you Chakotay?
Let's see how you like the taste of Night Sweat Souffle.

Neelix died as he had lived: improving crew morale.

What do Vulcans take to increase their sex drives?
Seven years.

\

Why did the Vulcan cross the road?
To get some poontang.

How many Vulcans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One.

What do you get when you cross a Vulcan and a Talaxian?
Raging crotch itch.

How do you piss off a Vulcan?
You stand on his shoulders, pull down your fly and relieve yourself.

What is the difference between a Vulcan and a Mugato?
A mugato will not drink his own urine.

 

[Nerys Myk]

CHAKOTAY: So, come here often?

 

[Bry_Sinclair]

[Neelix steps onto the Bridge]
Chakotay: Rat! Kill it! Kill it now!!!!

Charlie couldn't entice Seven to be an Angel, so he had to settle for Chakotay.

Crew of Voyager: YEAH!! WOO-HOO!!!!!! About time!!!!!

 

[Nerys Myk]

SESKA: Die!!!! Die!!!! Kill them all!!!! Bwaahahahahaha!!!!

CHAKOTAY: Something tells me you might not be a good fit for Starfleet.

 

[Triskelion]

Shortly after the massacre Janeway banned surprise parties for Maquis crewmembers.

 

[Triskelion]

Ensign: This fifteen deck walkup is a charming fixer-upper.
Chakotay: Sure. If you like space roaches.

 

[R. Star]

Ensign: This fifteen deck walkup is a charming fixer-upper.
Chakotay: Sure. If you like space roaches.

Tuvok(OS): While the space roach infestation continues unchecked, I am pleased to report the hedgehog traps have been successful.