Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets
- Thread starter Rincewiend
- Start date
I was trying to put my finger on Dale Dehaan and I think it's Keanu Reeves + Grant Gustin.
I was thinking that they had decent brother/sister chemistry but lousy romantic chemistry.
Maybe it will hold up better on repeat viewing at home but I found myself getting listless watching it in the theater. I really like The Fifth Element but this seems to be missing the spark and life of that one.
Ironically, I rather enjoyed the movie. And I especially enjoyed the political overtones of the plot. My only real complain is that the sequence featuring Ethan Hawke and Rhianna was unnecessary and grounded the plot to a halt until it ended, for it had nothing to do with the main narrative.
Well, it was an adaptation.....
I just saw it - had a lot of fun, and couldn't disagree more with the criticism of Cara Delevigne. She did carry basically that entire movie on her back (mostly because Dane DeHaan sadly didn't pull his weight and the villain didn't really do much) and she did it with an infectiously charming smile. I would sign up for an Agent Laureline spinoff in a heartbeat.
I also loved the opening sequence, and the bazaar chase - those were easily the best parts of the script, I think. Everything that came afterwards was beautiful, funny, sometimes interesting, but way, way too straightforward. Someone complained about how the audience doesn't know what's going on until the end. I don't know what audience that could possibly be, because it was blatantly obvious where everything was going even before the actual mission started, and then the movie just kept throwing out even more obvious clues to solve the 'mystery' that was never mysterious to begin with. This movie could definitely have used a little more complication.
Also, sadly, the action started great at the bazaar and just got less exciting with every sequence. For the climax to hinge on an almost stationary firefight with no sense of dynamic and no villains except big, ugly robots that were billed as scary through the whole movie, yet all die incredibly easily... that was sad. Also it was sad that Bubbles died with no warning or purpose. I think the movie would've been better served to keep her around for the ending.
I agree overall the Fifth Element was the better movie for having both Jovovich and Willis, whereas Valerian really only has Delevigne (and a merciful lack of Chris Tucker), but I did love this world, the gorgeous visuals and Agent Laureline herself. Overall I'd call it a C+, probably.
I also loved the opening sequence, and the bazaar chase - those were easily the best parts of the script, I think. Everything that came afterwards was beautiful, funny, sometimes interesting, but way, way too straightforward. Someone complained about how the audience doesn't know what's going on until the end. I don't know what audience that could possibly be, because it was blatantly obvious where everything was going even before the actual mission started, and then the movie just kept throwing out even more obvious clues to solve the 'mystery' that was never mysterious to begin with. This movie could definitely have used a little more complication.
Also, sadly, the action started great at the bazaar and just got less exciting with every sequence. For the climax to hinge on an almost stationary firefight with no sense of dynamic and no villains except big, ugly robots that were billed as scary through the whole movie, yet all die incredibly easily... that was sad. Also it was sad that Bubbles died with no warning or purpose. I think the movie would've been better served to keep her around for the ending.
I agree overall the Fifth Element was the better movie for having both Jovovich and Willis, whereas Valerian really only has Delevigne (and a merciful lack of Chris Tucker), but I did love this world, the gorgeous visuals and Agent Laureline herself. Overall I'd call it a C+, probably.
Indeed, while I (finally) went into the theatre thinking "this is gonna be pretty, but it ain't gonna be Valerian&Laureline", I walked out thinking... Well, halfway differently.
The movie is jarringly different, and I can see how some would dislike the jarring bit. I enjoyed every split second of it, exactly because the movie broke every rule in The Book, 2017 edition. The pacing was all wrong, the character chemistry was all wrong, the story was all wrong from ordering of elements to editing of elements to themes to overall plot to details of dialogue. Gloriously wrong. Excitingly wrong.
Consequently, this was Valerian&Laureline, just as created by M&C. Don't get confused by the introducing of the lead characters as important and skilled government agents (or even as lead characters). The former is supposed to be the dullest guy in the universe, an ugly simpleton only ever warranting motherly or sisterly love, despite his self-delusions. The latter is supposed to be the adult of the team albeit in a kid's body, with histrionics to match the latter when it suits her purposes. The team is supposed to sort of wander through an overwhelming universe they have zero hope of ever comprehending, a universe that only exists in order to be a commentary, while the adventure or mission chiefly involves them staying true to themselves.
The non-Hollywood pacing with super-long intervals between scene changes (remember the 20th century?) is so good it hurts. The gentle spelling out of the simple plot towards the end is unnecessary for the audience as such, but exactly what one would expect the poor thick-headed Valerian needs (in addition to another cosh in said head, as usual).
The "segues into side missions" thing is the one jarring bit that jars me wrong, but only because I can so plainly see what's going wrong there. Each and every of those segues was part of a linear whole in the original L'Ambassadeur des Ombres, with Laureline struggling through one humiliating alien ordeal after another in a monomaniacal quest to track down the helpless Valerian - it's she who dons the jellyfish, but also she who enlists the help of the shapeshifting prostitute etc. As adapted for the movie, the ordeals don't pile up into a martyring mountain, which was the very point of the original.
What would have killed the movie for me would have been the employing of a charismatic male lead. What I'd have liked more of is the inner workings of Alpha/Point Central, with more appearances by the three little informants and more agency to the nonhumans in general. What I regret is that we'll never get a sequel...
I probably wasn't as awake through the movie as I should have been. What Hollywood homages are there besides the Jessica Rabbit bit? What cameos besides the guy who gets thrown out of the brothel?
Timo Saloniemi
The movie is jarringly different, and I can see how some would dislike the jarring bit. I enjoyed every split second of it, exactly because the movie broke every rule in The Book, 2017 edition. The pacing was all wrong, the character chemistry was all wrong, the story was all wrong from ordering of elements to editing of elements to themes to overall plot to details of dialogue. Gloriously wrong. Excitingly wrong.
Consequently, this was Valerian&Laureline, just as created by M&C. Don't get confused by the introducing of the lead characters as important and skilled government agents (or even as lead characters). The former is supposed to be the dullest guy in the universe, an ugly simpleton only ever warranting motherly or sisterly love, despite his self-delusions. The latter is supposed to be the adult of the team albeit in a kid's body, with histrionics to match the latter when it suits her purposes. The team is supposed to sort of wander through an overwhelming universe they have zero hope of ever comprehending, a universe that only exists in order to be a commentary, while the adventure or mission chiefly involves them staying true to themselves.
The non-Hollywood pacing with super-long intervals between scene changes (remember the 20th century?) is so good it hurts. The gentle spelling out of the simple plot towards the end is unnecessary for the audience as such, but exactly what one would expect the poor thick-headed Valerian needs (in addition to another cosh in said head, as usual).
The "segues into side missions" thing is the one jarring bit that jars me wrong, but only because I can so plainly see what's going wrong there. Each and every of those segues was part of a linear whole in the original L'Ambassadeur des Ombres, with Laureline struggling through one humiliating alien ordeal after another in a monomaniacal quest to track down the helpless Valerian - it's she who dons the jellyfish, but also she who enlists the help of the shapeshifting prostitute etc. As adapted for the movie, the ordeals don't pile up into a martyring mountain, which was the very point of the original.
What would have killed the movie for me would have been the employing of a charismatic male lead. What I'd have liked more of is the inner workings of Alpha/Point Central, with more appearances by the three little informants and more agency to the nonhumans in general. What I regret is that we'll never get a sequel...
I probably wasn't as awake through the movie as I should have been. What Hollywood homages are there besides the Jessica Rabbit bit? What cameos besides the guy who gets thrown out of the brothel?
Timo Saloniemi
It broke the rules in the book that deserve to be rules. It's like the world's most expensive MST3K-grade movie outside of Battlefield Earth. If that floats your boat, then fine, but on top of it all, I found long stretches to be just plain boring, simply because I cared not a whiff for our pouty Vogue model leads.
