"I was in a really, really bad movie about an Earthman mutated by gamma rays into a superhero...but THAT was another life!!"
Trek XI Caption Contest #20: Are You Thinking What I'm Thinking?
- Thread starter Rat Boy
- Start date
"I was in a really, really bad movie about an Earthman mutated by gamma rays into a superhero...but THAT was another life!!"
Spock: "I do not see the logic in calling myself 'Luke', yourself, 'Bo', and the Enterprise, 'The General Lee'".
Uncomfortable sexual tension by the heat lamp.
It was all Starfleet regulations let them have.
"The eczema cream and skin moisturizer...
NOW, Human Pig-Dog!!!"
"No, I didn't get enough screen time in BLACK HAWK DOWN...and don't you ever say I did, dammit!!!"
"Perhaps you put too much lighter fluid on the flame, Captain.
The automatic fire suppression system is about to cut on if they were installed correctly."
I fought Somalian warlords once, but that was another lifetime,
I turned green with anger once, but that was another lifetime,
I fought Brad Pitt once, but that was another lifetime,
I hunted down Palestinian terrorists once, but that was another lifetime...
What am I a cat - Can I please keep a lifetime? Maybe one where I win an Oscar?
"Dammit, I have cake icing all over my face and it's only getting harder and crustier!
WHERE are your vessel's Wet Naps?!"
KIRK:"Okay, then.
Plan B.
You strip nude. I'll have Sulu lather you down with mayonnaise. Then the two of you wrestle in front of Nero.
It won't really solve anything, but it'll make him question his heterosexuality. And that's always good for a cheap laugh."
Kirk: "I get the hot one. You get ... the ... other ... one."
Spock, peeking over: "Why do I always get the overweight female?"
Kirk: "Was that an emotional response?"
Spock: "Oh, fine, fine, I'll entertain the overweight one. Jeez, you always play the 'emotion' card ..."
Kirk: "Is that self-pitying I hear?"
Spock: "See!"
Kirk: "Anger."
Spock: "EAT SHIT! <kicks Kirk in nuts> HOW'S THAT FOR 'ANGER,' BITCH?"
Kirk: "I was...gonna tell you...they're...identical...twins..."
Kirk: "I get the hot one. You get ... the ... other ... one."
Spock, peeking over: "Why do I always get the overweight female?"
Kirk: "Was that an emotional response?"
Spock: "Oh, fine, fine, I'll entertain the overweight one. Jeez, you always play the 'emotion' card ..."
Kirk: "Is that self-pitying I hear?"
Spock: "See!"
Kirk: "Anger."
Spock: "EAT SHIT! <kicks Kirk in nuts> HOW'S THAT FOR 'ANGER,' BITCH?"
Spock: "Oh. Well, aren't I embarrassed."
Kirk: "Aha!"
Spock: "Shut up!"
Spock: "You did remember to fill up on deuterium back at the starbase, right?"
Kirk: "Uhh-"
(Alert klaxons go off)
Nero: Oh, for the love of Remus, Kirk... did yah have to let one go?
Kirk (below camera): Sorry. I had the chili for lunch.