Trek XI Caption Contest #17: Tough Crowds
- Thread starter Rat Boy
- Start date
SPEAKER:"...and the final spot for tonight's Cosmic Bingofest '54 is...
E-2!!!"
CADET:"I won!!!!"
NERO:"Just wondering...
Anyone over there got a Wet-Nap I can use?
Don't...don't ask."
The Stepford Cadets
The love their service.
Nero: "I've been waiting for you, Starfox!"
SPOCK:"Give the transmission another minute, Captain.
The sound card wasn't installed until Tuesday."
ADMIRAL:"I'll now take a few questions...yes? You there?"
CADET:"Sir, is it true Paul McCartney was in another group before Wings? Or is that just an old urban legend?"
Although the chances were one in a million, every single Trekkie came to the premiere dressed as a redshirt. The Star Wars fans sat at the end of the rows and wore the Imperial Grey officers uniforms.
Nero: "James T. Kirk was a great man, but that was another life!"
Kirk: "Oh yeah, prove it."
Nero: "Your best friend turned into a god and you had to kill him."
Kirk: "Bones? Well, he got super drunk once and I had to punch him to keep from jumping off the top of the dorm."
Nero: "Well then, you made up a fake substance to bluff a powerful alien into not destroying your ship."
Kirk: "Corbomite? I told that Orion I had corbomite poisoning to get out of a second date."
Nero: "Oh yeah, well, you caught a space pimp selling sub-standard prostitutes."
Kirk: "You mean Carl?"
Nero: "Damn, this is harder than I thought..."
*a couple hours later*
Nero: "All right, what about the time you stole a Romulan cloaking device while Spock was putting the moves on the commander?"
Kirk: "Spock getting the girl? No way, buddy."
Nero: "Or the time you switched bodies with a woman?"
Kirk: "All I did was wear a wig and a bra for a fraternity hazing."
*Spock inches away slowly*
Naturally, graduation day HAD to happen on a morning when all the Academy's laundrettes were out of commission.
NERO:"I won't destroy you or your ship IF...and only if...you can correctly guess the object I'm currently holding in my left hand!"
SPOCK:"Your genitals?"
NERO:"ARRRRGGGGGGH...fine. You win. You can leave."
Spock: I think we struck a pedestrian, Jim.
Kirk: So it is a window...
Adama: Whaddaya hear, Starbuck?
Kara: Nothing but the rain, Sir.
Spock: Captain, are you crying?
Kirk: Shutup Spock, I got something in my eye is all. Now stifle it, I'm frakking watching the show!
McCoy: Damnit Jim I'm a doctor not a visitor!
New Okudagram Label for a New Film:
CAUTION:
OBJECTS ON THE FRONT BRIDGE VIEWSCREEN MAY BE BALDER THAN THEY APPEAR
The Class of '54 was known most for its ability to blend in with the henchmen of supervillains with underground volcano lairs.
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