Trek Lit Limericks
- Thread starter TGTheodore
- Start date
When Sulu first got a command,
Don't do that ... it's like ending a line with "trucked".
When Sulu first got a command
He abducted Janice Rand.
But Janice escaped
And since it all had been taped
Hikaru got a slap on his hand.
Whew ...
A dwarf people called Alexander
When Sulu first got a command
He abducted Janice Rand.
But Janice escaped
And since it all had been taped
Hikaru got a slap on his hand.
Whew ...
A dwarf people called Alexander
When Sulu first got a command
He absconded with Janice Rand.
They drank up some sake.
He performed bukkake.
She had to clean her face with sand.
See, folks, a good limerick has the same number of syllables in the first, second, and fifth lines, and the same number albeit smaller in the third and fourth. I had to change the second line to make it even, and replace the last line to make it even, and I thought, why, just redo the thing.
There, much better.
Now don't go be hatin' on me
'Cause I calls it just likes I see.
We all make mistakes
But them's are the breaks
When watchin' Star Trek on TV.
Now "ohhhhh-kaaaaayyyyy" THAT!
Here, see how easy it is. I'll start a new one...
He absconded with Janice Rand.
They drank up some sake.
He performed bukkake.
She had to clean her face with sand.
See, folks, a good limerick has the same number of syllables in the first, second, and fifth lines, and the same number albeit smaller in the third and fourth. I had to change the second line to make it even, and replace the last line to make it even, and I thought, why, just redo the thing.
There, much better.
Now don't go be hatin' on me
'Cause I calls it just likes I see.
We all make mistakes
But them's are the breaks
When watchin' Star Trek on TV.
Now "ohhhhh-kaaaaayyyyy" THAT!
Here, see how easy it is. I'll start a new one...
It isn't just the syllables, it's the meter, and the three longer lines in your example don't have the same rhythm.
Steve beat me to it.
And now ...
"Kira and Leeta were both scissorin'
In the finest Bajoran tradition."
Er ... Lesson Two: Rhyme. See what rap has done to a generation?
--Ted
And now ...
"Kira and Leeta were both scissorin'
In the finest Bajoran tradition."
Er ... Lesson Two: Rhyme. See what rap has done to a generation?
--Ted
I don't know what to do with scissorin'/tradition - plus, call me a chicken, but I just don't even want to guess what "scissorin'" means here. TG started a limerick that got lost somewhere or other - among some misplaced stressed syllables, maybe? So I'll go with his beginning. Maybe one of our many talented limerick doctors can figure out how to heal SicOne's contribution.
A dwarf people called Alexander
Just yearned for an orbital sander.
(Yes, I know lots of things rhyme with "Alexander" besides "orbital sander." But I don't care.
)
So I'll go with his beginning. Maybe one of our many talented limerick doctors can figure out how to heal SicOne's contribution.A dwarf people called Alexander
Just yearned for an orbital sander.
(Yes, I know lots of things rhyme with "Alexander" besides "orbital sander." But I don't care.
)
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"Scissoring" is slang for tribadism.
Fictitiously yours, Trent Roman
Fictitiously yours, Trent Roman
Kira and Leeta were both scissorin'
In the finest Bajoran tradition.
When caught on camera
This strange chimera
In the finest Bajoran tradition.
When caught on camera
This strange chimera
Kira and Leeta were both scissorin'
In the finest Bajoran tradition.
They told all the vedeks
That they both had headaches
But soon let young Dax join their position!
No, wait, wait!
Kira and Leeta were both scissorin'
In the finest Bajoran tradition.
By doing tribadism
There is no mess or jism.
A most amenable position!
In the finest Bajoran tradition.
They told all the vedeks
That they both had headaches
But soon let young Dax join their position!
No, wait, wait!
Kira and Leeta were both scissorin'
In the finest Bajoran tradition.
By doing tribadism
There is no mess or jism.
A most amenable position!
Sic...you have officially earned your screen name. Euw. Also the rhymes are, I'm sorry, wretched. ("Vedek" and "headache"? Dude.) But mostly just euw. Euw.
Just to get that out of my head (euw), back to Alexander's limerick:
A dwarf people called Alexander
Just yearned for an orbital sander.
"Maybe Parman would go,
If I could smooth wood just so...
And make him his very own Mars lander."
Just to get that out of my head (euw), back to Alexander's limerick:
A dwarf people called Alexander
Just yearned for an orbital sander.
"Maybe Parman would go,
If I could smooth wood just so...
And make him his very own Mars lander."
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JustKate, if I have well and truly disgusted you...then I have done my job, and done it well.
Yeah, I know, "vedek" and "headache". But that's all I had. Until I found the better one!
But, hey, I'll be back with some new ones later! Stay tuned!
(Kate mutters under her breath, "just ignore him, maybe he'll go away...")
Yeah, I know, "vedek" and "headache". But that's all I had. Until I found the better one!
But, hey, I'll be back with some new ones later! Stay tuned!
(Kate mutters under her breath, "just ignore him, maybe he'll go away...")
